What did you learn and apply to real life?

thunderstorm

Sat, Jan 28 2017, 8:34 pm

I was just thinking about highschool. I was so studious and did well but I barely remember anything I was taught. Especially in terms of lemudei kodesh. I remember learning about a passuk in Tehillim (that of course I can't remember) but it was thanking Hashem for the bracha of the garbage by the gates of yerushalayim. We asked what kind of bracha is garbage? Two things: one, we will be so blessed with a shefa that there will be overflow and tons of extra garbage. Or we will be blessed with many children which will increase the amount of garbage ex. Dirty diapers. I always keep that in mind when my house is a mess and my garbage cans are overflowing.

What do you remember that you apply to life now. I'm trying to wake up my memory to remember things I've learned 20 years ago.

amother

Floralwhite

Sat, Jan 28 2017, 10:00 pm

Most mamarei chazal that we spent hours memorizing for finals : ). B"H I can reapply them now with deeper understanding. And I feel my depth in understanding increases all the time, as I get older.

The hashkafos and Torah academic knowledge, especially what you memorized, never really left you...it's in there, informing your subconscious every day, aiding you to make good decisions! B"H you were zoche to learn things like Tehillim in your school years!

rachel6543

Sat, Jan 28 2017, 11:03 pm

How about basic math skills - fractions, multiplication, division...etc. My kid in school is learning these now and complains why does he have to learn them.

I've been showing him how I use these important skills every day. When following recipes, fractions are important, esp if you are doubling a recipe or cutting it in half. Or when shopping, the best way to compare product prices is by the unit amount. Math is important for budgeting and paying bills. Just a few daily examples.

Not to mention I work as a financial analyst and basic math skills are important. I use excel for much of my work, but occasionally an excel file can get corrupted or a formula can get messed up. It's important to be able to do basic math to validate the data my excel files spews out and make sure what the file says is correct and accurate.

FranticFrummie

Sun, Jan 29 2017, 12:00 am

I was pretty bad at math, and I still depend on calculators a lot. I figured I didn't need math, because I was going to be an artist! LOL

Well, the joke was on me. I became a jewelry designer. I have to go to wholesalers, and figure out if a gross of beads costs X, how much does each bead cost? If I need Y amount of beads per necklace, plus the cost of stringing materials and a clasp, what is the total cost of the finished piece? How do I calculate labor involved? What is a fair market price for this piece, what kind of markup am I going to get, and what is the total profit after expenses?

Don't forget packing materials, envelopes, stamps, business cards, a little free gift to encourage repeat business...

Now multiply that by EVERY SINGLE bead, clasp, jump ring, thread, focal point, wire, and gemstone I have to buy - and then factor in time and expense of going to gem and jewelry shows, sourcing material online, and filling orders.

Then there's the cost of your website and/or Etsy store, any additional online advertising you do, trade show table fees, flyers, and paying an assistant when needed. Since online commerce changes so fast, there are seminars on business management, too.

And that's just off the top of my head. I'm sure I'm leaving out something really important.

When I get my website up and running again, I'm going to hire DD to manage all of my social media accounts and promotional advertising, and pay her 10% of my sales. Oh look, fractions!

amother

Wheat

Sun, Jan 29 2017, 12:04 am

amother wrote:

Off-topic but I wish my Bais Yaakov education would have left me more equipped to deal with major disappointments in life. All I remember is "If you daven, Hashem will help..." and stuff of that nature.

I find that really only life experience can teach you how to deal with these disappointments (or tragedy, for that matter). My class collectively experienced a lot of large-scale tragedy during high school and I believe that we all came out better equipped to deal with life after that unfortunate time.

5mom

Sun, Jan 29 2017, 12:11 am

In limudei kodesh, I learned how to look up something I didn't know, how to read meforshim, and the historical development of halacha. Most importantly, my teachers wanted to create educated Jews. Almost all of them would say that their greatest joy was having a student ask a great question. Their dedication was inspiring.

A lot of the facts have slipped away, though I'm amazed at what remains, over 30 years later.

amother

Mint

Sun, Jan 29 2017, 12:29 am

amother wrote:

I disagree. Its inevitable that a percentage of graduates will end up with serious problems in their marriages, kids with serious health issues, mental and physical, serious financial issues. I came away feeling that theres nothing to fear, because if you daven, all problems will be helped.

Once you're married and experiencing problems it's too late and much trickier, to prepare for how to deal with them. We were given too rosy a picture of married life.

I don't think we could have learned how to deal with every problem in the world, but general guidelines would have been good.

amother

Silver

Sun, Jan 29 2017, 12:53 am

I remember learning years ago not to count money because then it loses its bracha, or something to that effect. I thought it was stupid at the time.

Life experience has taught me that what this actually means is not to count money out loud where people can hear you. It taught me not to share too much personal information, especially when the information is good.

I realized that whenever I would tell people about something fortunate in my life and share too much detail, it would go wrong shortly after.

For example, if someone told me her baby doesn't sleep through the night and I would share that my baby does sleep through the night, and share some techniques, and feel good about myself that I'm a better parent, for the next three nights in a row my baby would wake up.

If I'd share with someone that I got an unexpected windfall of $500, a few days later I'd have an unexpected expense of $500, almost to the penny.

This happened over and over until I became so careful with what I say. I don't share details of good things going on in my life with acquaintances, only with close friends and family and even then I keep things vague if there's the possibility someone will feel bad or feel jealous.

I'm not sure I believe in the concept of evil eye, or not wanting to jinx a good thing, but maybe there is a system of checks and balances. It seems ludicrous to me but this is one of the little things life has taught me. Don't brag. Not even a little. Don't gloat. Don't be arrogant. Don't take credit for good fortune. Don't say things that might make people jealous. If I do, the wheel turns and I'm on the bottom. If I don't say anything I get to quietly keep my good fortune.

thunderstorm

Sun, Jan 29 2017, 8:01 am

amother wrote:

I believe in not sharing your fortune with people if it may make them jealous.
Yet, I also believe in " refuah lifnei hamakah". I found so many times in life that I received the $500 bonus right before sudden $500 expense occurred. I don't think of it as a loss of the money, but rather Hashem gave me the $ in the nick of time.
But I do agree with the rest of your post. Don't be arrogant, don't gloat.....

amother

Floralwhite

Sun, Jan 29 2017, 8:07 am

amother wrote:

I find this interesting, because I think my Bais Yaakov education really helped with this!

Here is how I feel it worked: in highschool, when most girls have not yet reached great enough maturity to understand major life challenges, suffering, and disappointments, we spent time on the FOUNDATION of our chinuch...a large breadth of knowledge of Tanach, historiah, relevant hashkafos (yes mostly memorized, but most of us were not in the extreme challenges part of life yet)etc....

Then my seminary year was completely saturated in emunah, emunah, emunah, and HOW TO UNDERSTAND CHALLENGES AND SUFFERING, brought out through sefarim that I had not yet encountered in highschool, which I could only understand with my highschool chinuch! (And I went to an extremely mainstream, academic Bais Yaakov seminary.)

And about davening being given as an answer to life's problems - well, I have found through personal experience that this is the BEST advice I have EVER been given! An education in Tefillah, how it works in the process of hashgacha protis...invaluable.

amother

Floralwhite

Sun, Jan 29 2017, 9:13 am

I want to add to my post above:

One thing I feel now that I am a "grown up," is that there seem to be certain "acceptable" challenges, that are discussed in frum schools and in frum communities, and others that were never mentioned (except on imamother!), because they are somehow "unacceptable." (At least that's the implication by never mentioning them...)

Acceptable challenges would be losing a loved one, infertility, sickness, parnassah issues, and not finding a marriage partner quickly. Challenges never discussed would be real machlokes inside families, the possibility that a parent could have a social or emotional disorder and so the normal halacos of kibbud av v'eim require consultation with a rav, abuse (parent to child, between spouses), problems of a sectual nature (molestation, issues inside families, etc), etc, etc.

As a younger person it bothered me that there seemed to be only "acceptable" challenges to apply emunah and Torah hashkafa. Now that I'm an adult, I see Hashem, emunah, and tefillah don't discriminate: we're all flawed humans, and Hashem's love can be felt in the most "unacceptable" challenges.