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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Giving Gifts
amother
Beige
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Tue, May 02 2017, 1:40 am
I've seen a lot of doctors have a "doctor's prayer" on their wall. Is there an equivalent for lawyers, or some relevant inspirational pasuk or quote that I could put into an artwork? It could also be a saying about chessed or doing for others in general.
There is an attorney who has gone way above and beyond for me and I want to show them a lot of appreciation but I don't know how. Chocolates or flowers would be a joke. I think the only way I can do this is for it to be something meaningful.
They are Jewish but not observant so I'm not even sure whether they would want to hang up Jewish artwork but would probably appreciate it somewhere in their home if not in the office. I feel that art is really such a personal taste thing but on the other hand I can't think of anything else that would be meaningful. They worked with me pro bono through an organization and went WAY above and beyond and they probably make more in a day than I do in a month (and due to the nature of the legal work they know this and would not appreciate if I squandered any of it on silly gifts!) so this has to be a meaning thing, it's not like a gift for a teacher or cleaning lady who would appreciate the practical/monetary value of a gift card, you know?
I'm open to any really good suggestion.
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amother
Tan
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Tue, May 02 2017, 7:05 am
I'd avoid something too personal or something that's obvious you want them to hang in public. Not familiar with doctor prayers so can't help. Please skip the cheesy "best ____" mug.
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amother
Brunette
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Tue, May 02 2017, 8:52 am
My attorney relative just did a huge pro bono favor for a community and they gave him a glass desk plaque with white words on it in a nice calligraphy saying thank you, along with a pasuk that those who are busy with communal matters (tzorchei tzibur) should be blessed.
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amother
Brunette
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Tue, May 02 2017, 8:53 am
Another respectable option would be an expensive wine/other alcohol. ($150 range or higher)
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amother
Mint
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Tue, May 02 2017, 9:52 am
If there was a court decision in your case, you could consider having a lucite "tombstone" made of the first page of the decision.
http://www.lucitetombstones.co.....y.htm
These used to be very popular. I haven't seen them in years, but your attorney might like one. Its not as ostentatious as wall art, and can be used as a paperweight or placed on a shelf.
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Amarante
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Tue, May 02 2017, 10:37 am
I would not give a tchotchke because people - especially wealthy people - generally have more than enough tchotchkes.
LOL - Tombstone. I haven't thought of those for years. I never saw them in connection with a litigation matter but when I worked on Wall Street, they were given when a big transaction closed.
As to gifting, what about donation to a cause they support. I think many wealthy people find that kind of thing more meaningful than something material. You could supplement with a nice bottle of wine when you send the notice.
I would be extremely careful about a frum person sending a secular Jew some kind of religious item however well intentioned unless it was a gift in connection with a simcha - I.e. Bah Mitzvah of the person's child or wedding since for these events, even secular Jews generally like to receive traditional items since many do observe Pesach or Rosh Hashanah. But as a gift outside of those events, it might be viewed as some kind of judgment on their standards.
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amother
Sienna
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Tue, May 02 2017, 2:13 pm
My DH is an attorney.
Someone gave him a metal Torah desk thingy that says on it "tzedek, tzedek tirdof " and the stand has his name engraved.
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amother
Sienna
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Tue, May 02 2017, 2:17 pm
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Miri7
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Tue, May 02 2017, 2:24 pm
I think that tzedek tzedek tirdof resonates with most attorneys. Especially those who go above and beyond for a pro bono client. Even non religious attorneys feel that they do holy work when they help someone and further the cause of justice.
I like this piece of art though it's a bit pricey:
https://www.hebrica.com/produc.....t-art
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amother
Beige
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Tue, May 02 2017, 3:16 pm
Art is too personal taste but wine isn't? Ok... but again I'm looking more for meaning rather than value. I didn't qualify for pro bono legal help because I have a $150 wine budget. My thought was that if they don't like the art they don't need to use it, it's the thought that counts here and it's a short term professional relationship, not a relative who will visit and get insulted if their gift is not prominently displayed in your living room.
Unsure about the Jewish thing. They're not totally unaffiliated, they definitely identify as Jewish. I definitely wouldn't give something preachy like a siddur or book. But if I'm looking for a meaningful saying or thought then my first guess is that I'd find it somewhere Jewish. I guess it doesn't have to be, just because that's what I associate as meaningful. Therefore open to any kind of suggestion.
One reason I was thinking maybe art is because I am am amateur artist so there's an option of making something myself rather than paying out cash I don't have for something impersonal. But I'm not yet sure if that's what I'd do because I don't know if I'll have time and since there's always the aspect of taste and they might not like/use it anyway then maybe I shouldn't put that much kishkes into it.
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marina
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Tue, May 02 2017, 4:55 pm
I would love something with tzedek tzedek tirdof on it.
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Miri7
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Tue, May 02 2017, 5:57 pm
marina wrote: | I would love something with tzedek tzedek tirdof on it. |
Me too. I think I may just get myself one since no one has gotten one for me yet.
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mha3484
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Tue, May 02 2017, 5:59 pm
Ruth Bader Ginsburg has a mezuzah case on her office that stays tzedek tzedek. It was in a news story. If she can why not any one else?
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amother
Beige
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Tue, May 02 2017, 6:20 pm
Got it, I will make tzedek tirdof wall art for Marina and Miri7 and use the profit to buy a nice wine for my lawyer
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amother
Coffee
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Wed, May 03 2017, 8:49 am
Speaking from personal experience: It really is the thought that counts. A pro bono client once knit a hat and bootie set for my baby (I was very obviously pregnant at the time) and I was really touched by her efforts even though the set was not at all my taste. (Okay, she also didn't do a great job with the knitting.)
I actually hate Judaica art, and I'm Orthodox. Somehow I would still like something smallish that said "Tzedek, tzedek tirdof" on it. I wouldn't care for a giant wall plaque that looks like a diploma though. Then again, that's just me.
Don't feel badly about not being able to afford an expensive gift. It's generally not appropriate for an attorney to accept an expensive gift from a client anyway. I would not accept one.
Anything that shows your appreciation for the attorney's efforts on your behalf will be great. The card/note that you send with your gift may end up being the most meaningful part.
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