Job discrimination for being overweight

amother

Cerulean

Mon, May 08 2017, 4:45 am

I have had trillions of interviews over the last year or so. I know my CV is good. But I never get that call back telling me that they want to hire me for the job.
I am very over weight. I do look presentable when I go to these interviews. I dont look like a shlump. I am also working on my weight, but it is a long process.
I am convinced that the reason why I am not getting called back is because they get one look at me and they get convinced that a very over weight person cant do the job Crying

Its just not fair. I know that I could do so many of these jobs really well.
This is really just a vent. Nothing any of you can do, it just hurts badly.

amother

Cerulean

Mon, May 08 2017, 7:10 am

happyone wrote:

That's an awful feeling . Weight is a lifetime struggle . I wonder if thats the reason or are you uncomfortable with your weight and it's perceived as lack of self confidence ?

No, I bh come across at interviews with a lot of confidence.

Iymnok

Mon, May 08 2017, 7:26 am

Can you let them know beforehand so that they expect someone of your shape to walk in the door? Or bring it up in passing during the interview to send the message that you are healthy (you won't take lots of sick leave), respectful and a pleasure to be around.
People can be really stupid. You know full well that you are talented and skilled in the area that you are applying for. That's clear in your post. Confident too. And I'm sure you make sure you look great for the interview. So my suggestion is addressing the elephant in the room.
(I'm wondering if they're intimidated by you. I'm a little intimidated by my own friends who are a lot taller than me.)

amother

Cerulean

Mon, May 08 2017, 7:39 am

Iymnok wrote:

lymnok are you serious? I should tell them that I am a very overweight woman? When exactly? When they send an email reply telling me they are interested in meeting me for an interview? When they give me directions in a phone conversation? Im sorry, but do you really think that is appropriate? Or that that will make me feel any better?
And no, there is no way they are intimidated by me. I am 5 ft and lets put it this way, very round. But intimidating is not a word I would ever use for myself. And Im actually surprised to hear someone say that.

simcha2

Mon, May 08 2017, 7:51 am

I am a big believer in following up with a place after not getting a job.

Hi, thank you so much for the chance to interview. In order to develop my skills can you please give me some feedback.

Some places will just say "we found someone more qualified", but some will give you feedback. It may be that there is another issue other than weight. Or they may hum and haw and maybe, just maybe, they'll look at their own prejudices and help the next overweight person.

amother

Chartreuse

Mon, May 08 2017, 9:25 am

I'm in the same boat, op, interview after interview, where I KNOW I'm doing everything right, and that I'm eminently qualified and most of them have gone well (and I know when it hasn't gone that well), and never get the offer. It's making me very depressed. I'm also overweight, I haven't really thought about it but studies have shown that this type of discrimination exists. But who knows.

Simcha2- these days, they'll never tell you why, just "we went in a different direction" or "we decided to pursue a different candidate". To actually give a reason opens up the risk of saying something that can lead to a lawsuit.

simcha2

Mon, May 08 2017, 9:29 am

amother wrote:

Simcha2- these days, they'll never tell you why, just "we went in a different direction" or "we decided to pursue a different candidate". To actually give a reason opens up the risk of saying something that can lead to a lawsuit.

Yes, I agree they would never say, sorry you're too fat/badly annoying/Jewish etc. But as someone who has done a lot of hiring I will give candidates genuine feedback if they ask for it. Your skills are outdated, you could benefit from some training in x area etc.

Also, by being called upon to analyse why I didn't select a certain candidate it forces me to address my own prejudices and preferences and how they affect my hiring.

amother

Chartreuse

Mon, May 08 2017, 9:36 am

simcha2 wrote:

Of course nobody is going to be dumb enough to say outright "you're pregnant/black/over the age of 50" or whatever. However, even something seemingly benign can be used against them. For example, telling someone their skills are outdated could be used as evidence of age discrimination. And other things that could be taken the wrong way even if you don't see it. I stopped asking because the few times I did, I was told that it was company policy not to give a reason, just that they moved on with another candidate. I stopped asking because that's the only answer I've ever gotten.

amother

Cerulean

Mon, May 08 2017, 9:37 am

simcha2 wrote:

And even if they would in fact say why they "went another way", I am more than 100% sure that they are not going to say its because one is over weight. No way would they do that. So its pointless really.

amother

Vermilion

Mon, May 08 2017, 9:50 am

Its impossible to proove discrimination. My mother was a secritary for more than 30 years, the best there was. She was also receptionist most of those jobs. As she aged, she found it harder to get jobs where you have to be the first person that people see when they walk in to a business. She once even tried to hire a lawyer for a discrimination lawsuit when she had proof that she had been fired, and the company brought in a cute young girl to replace her. She couldnt find a lawyer to take her on. You cant win these cases.

Having said that, op, are you so sure your weight is why you arent getting hired? I see on fb all the time people complaining that they cant get dates, jobs, etc and are SO SURE that they are perfect for the job, but blame the other party when in fact their posts make it clear that ts them, not the other party (NOT saying thats true for you).

Have you gone to a job coach for help? What experience do you have?

SixOfWands

Mon, May 08 2017, 9:52 am

amother wrote:

Its just not fair. I know that I could do so many of these jobs really well.
This is really just a vent. Nothing any of you can do, it just hurts badly.

Unfortunately, size-ism is one of the last forms of prejudice deemed acceptable in society. See, eg, http://www.refinery29.com/2015.....-work

Nothing to add. No suggestions. Just wishing you luck.

Mon, May 08 2017, 10:05 am

It's great that you have been getting interviews. That suggests that you have a very strong resume.

Is there any way to counter the negative stereotypes during an interview? For example, find a way to mention that your attendance record is stellar, that you are rarely late and never absent for illness (if that's true). Show examples of your work, demonstrating how neat and thorough it is.

Do you have good references? It may help if someone who knows your work will vouch for you.

FranticFrummie

Mon, May 08 2017, 10:20 am

OP, I believe you. "Fat = lazy = incompetent" in the job world. It's horrible and it sucks big time.

In today's youth culture, with plastic surgery, aggressive beauty marketing, and image obsession, I only see things getting worse.

Welcome to being "Black". The only difference is, theoretically you can lose the weight, but Black people can never stop being Black.

It breaks my heart. All I can do is pray for Moshiach to come and open people's minds. In the meantime, we all need to be more aware of our own biases, and call out others when we can.

{{{{big hugs}}}}

Never forget, you are a person of great value. G-d willing soon, someone will get their head out of their rear end and realize this.

amother

Brown

Mon, May 08 2017, 10:20 am

I am very tiny and I feel I am also discriminated against for my body size. In my case, despite a laundry list of qualifications, the hiring people just subconsciously think I'm a little girl. I am sure if I were a tall male I'd be hired in an instant. (I wrote here before that my right to go to the mikvah was challenged by the mikvah ladies who thought I was a young girl). I wear sophisticated clothes, makeup, etc., and I still look like a 13 year old girl dressing up in her mom's clothes. I am so small I can wear Target little girl's clothes. (But I don't).
It hurts, OP. I'm sorry. You are not alone.

Amarante

Mon, May 08 2017, 10:37 am

Sorry and yes you are not imagining it. Sizism exists just as sexism, agism and racism exists to one degree of another. Just degrees of normal attractivism have been shown to be factors in grades for school children. Height is an indicator of men's earnings statistically.

I don't know if there is anything one can do except lose the weight or at least get it to the point where you are just zaftig.

Since you are not getting hired anyway, can you make losing weight your job/priority for a few months. Losing weight takes a lot of effort in my experience and the more energy and priority you can give to it the more success you will have.

It is very feasible to lose 10 pounds per month and losing 30 or 40 pounds would make a significant dent in whatever your current weight is.