Going to flatbush IY"H for succos

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Mitzvahmom

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 10:56 am

I am so excited Smile

Here's my thing..
There is a shadchan that wants me to go to williamsburg to "show me" around. I have not ever been, and I have a tendency to dress comfortable tznias of course. But I rarely wear button down shirts, just because I never feel comfortable in them. Also it's hard to find ones that I am not allergic too.. If that makes sense to you, I have very sensitive skin.

My friend told me that the way I dress is just not good enough, so what do I do?

Garden

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 11:11 am

As long as what you wear is tznius, I don't see why you should change the way you dress. Be yourself and be comfortable. It is not like you are offending anyone by dressing immodestly c'v. Have a wonderful Y'T!

chocolate moose

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 11:15 am

Don't fool anyone - if a man marries you for your clothes, I don't know WHAT to say......

You just enjoy it !

DefyGravity

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 11:20 am

You don't have to wear button down shirts in order to look nice. Perhaps you can find different shirts that are within the realms of your style that might be slightly different than what you normally wear.

creativemommyto3

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 11:38 am

ask mama bear!

greenfire

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 11:39 am

aren't flatbush and willi 2 dif areas ... wouldn't a willi man be too much for you ... one shouldn't have to change themselves ... ever ...

DefyGravity

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 11:44 am

I don't know how MitzvahMom dresses, so this comment is in no way directed at her.

Sometimes people just don't know how to dress themselves. They don't realize how to dress for their body type, or are simply clueless about what clothing looks good on them.

I have a friend with a gorgeous figure that always looked a little sloppy. One of her friends took her shopping and taught her what to wear. Now she looks incredible. She didn't realize that her clothing was too big and didn't fit her the way it should.

Let's face it - people judge others based on how they look. You can be the nicest person in the world, but a first impression means everything. It's always worthwhile to get a second opinion on clothing and see if you're dressing in a way that best flatters yourself!

Mitzvahmom

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 11:57 am

for those that know me irl...

I do not think I dress untznias, everything is long on me because I am a small person...

I do not have money to get things that fit me, so things are always long on me...

MrsLeo

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 12:10 pm

I dont dress "the chassidish" way. I mean I'm tzenius but I wear tshirts and long denim skirts and a baseball cap with a pony sheitel all the time and wen I go to my husbands family in williamsburg or monroe I dont change the way I dress. so people look at me - thats their problem.

gryp

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 12:13 pm

Mitzvahmom, I think the way you dress now is fine. Be yourself and have a great Yomtov!

DefyGravity

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 12:13 pm

I read your opening post wrong! I thought the woman wanted to take you shopping so you'd be well-dressed for the shadchan. She wants you to dress differently just because you'll be in Williamsburg? Tell her to mind her own business and wear what you want. No need to purchase new clothing just for a quick walk through a neighborhood. I've walked through Williamsburg in much worse.

Mitzvahmom

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 12:18 pm

thanks GR

Plus I have already met with this shadchan before, I think she just wants to show me around as I have never been there before... And she's not met my kids, should be interesting..

shopaholic

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 12:29 pm

I've met you MM & you dress just fine. Very tznius. I go to Willi for the Dr & I wear whatever I usually wear. I think if I would be staying there over Yom Tov, I would choose a more conservative outfit than usual, but for a day visit to look around - be yourself.

chocolate moose

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 12:41 pm

When I go to Willie I dress as much as possible like "them". I don't want to stick out......but MM, you have a real problem - you're so little and cute, everyone is going to want to hug you !!!!!!! You might have to "ugly-up" !!!!!

DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU !!!!!!!!!

Mitzvahmom

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 12:53 pm

hug me?!?!?

I am already thinking of how my kids are going to react...

Mommy everyone is Jewish, it's so neat!

faigie

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 12:57 pm

..willi is very stamar. is that the direction you want to meet/marry?

Mitzvahmom

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 1:04 pm

A. I am lubavitch
B. this shadchan knows all sorts of yidden

Also, so what if he happens to be a different sect of chassidish.. If he is respectful of me, and understanding of what I want in life. Why should I not give him a chance? Even if it's just to go on a meet?

faigie

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 1:19 pm

true, one never knows where their bashert is hanging out!

MrsLeo

Wed, Sep 19 2007, 3:37 pm

I never in my life would've imagined that I would marry a satmar guy from kiryas yoel, but here I am!
you never know!

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