Wake up DH for maariv?

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Forum -> Judaism -> Halachic Questions and Discussions

View latest: 24h 48h 72h

Wake up?

Yes

40%

[ 22 ]

60%

[ 33 ]

Total Votes : 55

Tiredmom3

Thu, Oct 13 2022, 10:45 pm

DH fell asleep after an emotionally draining day. He intended to go to maariv 20 minutes ago. Do I wake him up? I know it's not my job and I tried once but am not sure if I should try again...

funmamma

Thu, Oct 13 2022, 10:47 pm

Absolutely not. No. It's none of your business.

happytobemom

Thu, Oct 13 2022, 10:48 pm

You have to know him. Do you think he'd want you to?

Java

Thu, Oct 13 2022, 10:49 pm

This is so personal lol. My husband I would because he would be really upset to miss maariv, but really you have to know your own husband

BrachaVHatzlocha

Thu, Oct 13 2022, 10:49 pm

I would ask, "do you wanna be woken for maariv?" But then again, my husband is the type who can fall right back asleep easily.

happytobemom

Thu, Oct 13 2022, 10:50 pm

funmamma wrote:

Absolutely not. No. It's none of your business.

It is your business, because he's your husband. But that doesn't mean you should wake him, it means you should think about what's best for him, including what he'd want you to do.
Also, where is he sleeping? Is he on the couch or somewhere else and is anyway going to wake up at some point, and then feel bad that he didn't daven? If that's the case, it may be better to wake him. But if he's in bed, it's very different.

BrachaVHatzlocha

Thu, Oct 13 2022, 10:50 pm

I would ask, "do you wanna be woken for maariv?" But then again, my husband is the type who can fall right back asleep easily.

Tiredmom3

Thu, Oct 13 2022, 10:59 pm

He woke up on his own but will actually have the opportunity to take your advice and ask him if he wants to be woken in general. I feel like I'm a newlywed all over again with this one 😬

Blessing1

Thu, Oct 13 2022, 11:34 pm

I do, because he'd be upset if I didn't wake him.

SG18

Fri, Oct 14 2022, 2:33 am

Good idea to ask, in general. Over Chag, I knew DH wanted to be woken for minyanim, so I would wake him gently, ask if he wanted to wake up, and let him decide. But he can fall back asleep easily.

erm

Sat, Oct 15 2022, 8:37 pm

I would wake my husband up because he would be very upset to have missed davening with a minyan.

hodeez

Sat, Oct 15 2022, 8:42 pm

I wouldn't if he can catch a shomer shabbos minyan. If not lightly tap him and say maariv is in 5 min, don't shake the guy. From there he can make his own decision. Hope he feels better

chanar

Sat, Oct 15 2022, 8:42 pm

If I intended to do something, then fell asleep from exhaustion, and my husband didn’t wake me for it I’d be very upset..

snailmail

Tue, Oct 25 2022, 6:37 pm

It depends if he was expecting to go or is particular to never miss a minyan - did he intentionally go to sleep, or just nodded off on the sofa. Also, I am assuming there is no other minyan than what you would wake him for, its either the last or only minyan in the area.

judyjew

Tue, Oct 25 2022, 7:27 pm

I think that from a halachik stand point a person that's sleeping isn't responsible for anything so it would be possibly fine... of course ask your lor, might be mistaken.

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