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Forum
-> Parenting our children
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amother
Cinnamon
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 Sun, Nov 19 2023, 6:12 pm
| amother Nemesia wrote: | | The problem is not hitting. The problem is hitting out of anger. |
The main problem with hitting is using physical force to control children. As a child ages the parent needs to hit more often and harder to control. The child learns that a little (or a lot) physical pain is a small price to pay and starts misbehaving more and more. It creates a vicious cycle. I'm speaking from personal experience. Very personal. B"H we have managed to raise our children without hitting them. With a lot of love, clear boundaries, hard work, and of course the help of HKB"H it very possible to raise children who want to do the right thing.
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amother
DarkGray
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Sun, Nov 19 2023, 6:38 pm
| amother Cinnamon wrote: | | The main problem with hitting is using physical force to control children. As a child ages the parent needs to hit more often and harder to control. The child learns that a little (or a lot) physical pain is a small price to pay and starts misbehaving more and more. It creates a vicious cycle. I'm speaking from personal experience. Very personal. B"H we have managed to raise our children without hitting them. With a lot of love, clear boundaries, hard work, and of course the help of HKB"H it very possible to raise children who want to do the right thing. |
Just the opposite, as the child grows up you need to potch less bc you can talk to them. In fact I dont think I ever hit past age 9. That is, if you disciplined them when they were younger and testing you.
And it's not using 'physical force', but rather a "wake up, this is not an ok type of thing to do." It's not the end of the world.
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amother
OP
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Sun, Nov 19 2023, 6:42 pm
| amother DarkGray wrote: | Just the opposite, as the child grows up you need to potch less bc you can talk to them. In fact I dont think I ever hit past age 9. That is, if you disciplined them when they were younger and testing you.
And it's not using 'physical force', but rather a "wake up, this is not an ok type of thing to do." It's not the end of the world. |
I’m just so sad thinking about how many mothers are normalizing and excusing hitting. I want to cry thinking about all these children getting hit.
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amother
DarkGray
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Sun, Nov 19 2023, 6:50 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | I’m just so sad thinking about how many mothers are normalizing and excusing hitting. I want to cry thinking about all these children getting hit. |
Don't be so sad. They get a potch once in a blue moon. They get tons more love, care, and attention.
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amother
Dustypink
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Sun, Nov 19 2023, 6:54 pm
| amother OP wrote: | | I’m just so sad thinking about how many mothers are normalizing and excusing hitting. I want to cry thinking about all these children getting hit. |
Save your sadness for real sad situations. I assure you that no one needs your pity or sadness.
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amother
Amaranthus
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Sun, Nov 19 2023, 7:06 pm
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OP can you ask the parents of the last 3 years the Rebbe and Morah were teaching those students. See what was going on in those classes. Don't jump to believe a child at a young age. If the boy is 15 and the boy said ''My Father Slapped me across the face'' then I would find another Rebbe and school.
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