Only makes in diaper

amother

Tue, Dec 19 2023, 7:32 pm

My dd is toilet trained completely with pee but cries and screams to poop in her diaper. I can't force her to make on the toilet. Amy ideas?she's almost 3.5

amother

Oleander

Tue, Dec 19 2023, 7:42 pm

Same here but I’m not concerned. It will come when he is motivated enough. However if it’s bothering you and you want to teach her you can start by having her go in the diaper in the bathroom.

amother

Whitewash

Tue, Dec 19 2023, 8:00 pm

I wouldn't push it. If she learns to hold it in and gets constipated, it'll be a bigger problem on your hands. She will outgrow the diaper eventually.

amother

Tangerine

Tue, Dec 19 2023, 8:02 pm

Cut a hole in the diaper and put her on the toilet with the diaper on. Then make a big deal about it being in the toilet. If she’s not ready for that you can do it in smaller steps. Diaper on but only in the bathroom. Then move to diaper on but on the toilet. Then move to cutting the hole until you can be totally diaper free.

amother

Yarrow

Tue, Dec 19 2023, 8:10 pm

#2 is easier in a diaper because you can squat. Maybe you can use a stool? It took about 6 weeks for my daughter to get use to it. The first 2 weeks she cried every time. The first week she tried to hold it in and was in such discomfort. Then it became less scary. That was in August. Well we are in December and she is learning how to flush and is so proud of herself. She turned 3 in November.

Einikel

Tue, Dec 19 2023, 8:13 pm

My daughter has a really hard time with this especially when she was going thru transitions. I had a baby, she started school etc. She used to run to another room and do it in her underwear. Bh with time it got much better and she has no problem at all. She's 5 now.

amother

Trillium

Tue, Dec 19 2023, 8:53 pm

When we were potty training I let my dd watch videos about training while sitting and waiting to poo. That way she sat on the toilet for longer. If she's already constipated from holding it in, there are kiddie stool softeners (not laxatives, softeners) you can use to help it be less painful. We had an issue in early potty training where the daycare didn't cooperate even though she was potty trained at home, so she stopped asking them to poo there and held it in, which causes stool to harden. Then she was in pain at home. It was very sad, we switched her to another daycare and it was much better. But we still had to use a softener for a bit. The doctor explained that when kids hold it in, stool hardens, causes pain, so they get scared to go, hold it in more, causes more pain. If her stool is soft, I'd try to make potty more fun so she sits a bit longer (not more than 10 minutes though.)

amother

Tue, Dec 19 2023, 9:34 pm

Thank you for ideas. I tried the diaper on toilet. She was still so scared.
She uses the regular toilet to pee. Do you think I should get her a potty just for pooping? Or will that mess with training.

amother

Jade

Tue, Dec 19 2023, 10:29 pm

I had this with my son..he was trained for pee for 6 months and wouldn’t poop in the potty (he also refused to wear a diaper bc he was a big boy now…so cleanup was brutal)

I followed the approach of an article (which I can no longer find) but it worked and over the course of a month, he was fully poop trained. I borrowed a DVD from the library (paw patrol) and told him that he could watch it whenever he pooped on the toilet. It took a few weeks of offering, but eventually he started trying again and it worked! First, he would poop only a little (and finish up, off-toilet later) but after a month we got there.

Not sure this would work with everyone, but the two key elements were taking off the pressure and offering an immediate, highly valued reward. My husband was not a huge fan (we are a very low screen time family) but also he was not cleaning massive #2 messes on the regular.

She will get there! But the wait feels very long

yellowroses

Tue, Dec 19 2023, 10:49 pm

amother OP wrote:

My dd is toilet trained completely with pee but cries and screams to poop in her diaper. I can't force her to make on the toilet. Amy ideas?she's almost 3.5

My daughter was in diapers for number two until she was like 5 years old. Doc said to not apply any pressure, she will use the toilet as soon as she is ready and she did so on her own. I‘m so glad I listened to him. He said the more pressure parents apply, the harder the child fights back.

amother

Goldenrod

Wed, Dec 20 2023, 9:13 pm

My daughter would go in her pull up every day until age 3 when she took a nap. It was totally predictable and she would call me to come change her. We discussed the fact that she could just walk into her bathroom and sit down and I would come to clean her up. We spent time in there together hanging out, but nothing happened. Eventually, she picked out a gift she wanted (a purse with pretend keys, lipstick, phone) and it sat wrapped in the closet until she did her business in the potty. That turned out to be the motivator. Happy to report that today she is a Mommy and will be starting potty training on her own child in the not too distant future. So there's hope for your dd!