Is there a ADHD school w/ dorm for 7 & 8 Grade ?

amother

Thu, Jan 04 2024, 1:10 pm

Hi
Without going into a whole long story , most of you here prob know what’s life at home & in school like for a parent who has a child with serious ADHD + other existing conditions
I am really feeling at the end of rope , cant handle life w/ him & also he is currently refusing to go back to school after being suspended
Yes he is on meds
Is there such a thing as a yeshiva ( not yeshivish
) for 7th & 8th grade with a dorm ?

amother

Thu, Jan 04 2024, 1:15 pm

mha3484 wrote:

I have never heard of such a thing.

Thank you for replying!!
At least I don’t feel alone . Any idea what to do w/ a child who “ dropped himself out of school “ & is refusing to go back
Yes we are going to the doctor tomm , to try to work out his meds . My hope is that if we nail his anxiety now he will go back .
Due to my own personal issues also, I literally can’t have this child home with me
What is a mother to do ?

mha3484

Thu, Jan 04 2024, 1:26 pm

I think it depends a lot on why he "dropped out". I have a son in 7th who has a love hate relationship with school. So I can definitely relate. School refusal is a real issue that comes from anxiety. Many kids experience this.

First, I would do a Collaborative Problem Solving style conversation with him. I would try to get to the bottom of what is getting in his way and work as a team to solve the issues. At this age, he has to feel like an active part of his life it empowers them and if he has anxiety it helps him feel more in control. The goal is to make school work for him. My son knows that mesivta will likely be better experience for him for a lot of reasons so he sees that the experiences he is having are not forever.

If school really is not an option at the end of the day, I'd take my tuition dollars and instead pay for chavrusas for him at a local kollel/yeshiva so he goes to schacharis has breakfast, then he learns one on one for a few hours at least has lunch, maybe does an online secular studies program. Basically a full day of being busy. Boredom is the enemy.

amother

Sapphire

Thu, Jan 04 2024, 2:50 pm

OP
There are some schools (not sure how you define yeshiva or yeshivish, but, there’s a school in California (though not sure how young they take) and in Florida, at least one in each.
There are high schools that cater to out-of-the box thinking, in terms of giving kids hands on learning and classroom learning, there are some in the Chicago area Baltimore area, Monsey area and a few other NY/NJ communities. I think upstate NY and at least one other midwest location.

But for 7th and 8th grades, the only schools that are yeshiva style (Torah learning and secular studies) but not any with dorms, I don’t think, that assist with students struggling with adhd and learning issues are those housed in other larger schools they exist in some same areas listed above. Not sure what is helpful, depends on where you are (assuming USA) and what needs your child has. If medicated (but it could be not the right class of med, or dose, etc. that is factoring in too). I am sorry things are so stressful, glad you can come here to discuss.

amother

Stoneblue

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 9:54 pm

amother OP wrote:

I can't help with school ideas, but just wanted to say you are not alone, op. I feel the same way with my 8th grade son... It is so difficult to have him around; such a huge stress on the entire family and shalom bayis. I know my son couldn't function in a dorm environment, but I SO badly wish I could send him off.
By the way, have you ever sent him to sleep away camp? Maybe that would be a temporary relief? I plan on doing that this summer even though it's so expensive.

amother

DarkRed

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 10:00 pm

amother Stoneblue wrote:

I could’ve written this post work for word. My 13 year old has HFA, is on anxiety and adhd meds…. Life at home is unbearable, but he wouldn’t handle dorm life either…..and claims his never going back to camp.

He is hardly at school…

amother

Stoneblue

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 10:17 pm

amother DarkRed wrote:

Hugs!! Gosh, where are all you similar mothers in real life? Seems like I'm the only one with an impossible son who refuses to get up for school in the morning, blows up about supper almost every night, and causes so much strife in the home. We really need a support group!

amother

Papaya

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 11:25 pm

My son is like this. All I can say is that you and your neurologist or psychiatrist need to be in very close contact and the doctor needs to have updated info on medications. My son was having frequent intense blow ups all summer and the beginning of the year and people were starting to say things like I literally don't know how you live with this. He was a terror. He explained his intense feelings of anger to the psychiatrist and now takes a quarter of something at night that has helped IMMENSELY, he's just all around calmer, doesn't feel the need to blow up at everyone and everything. I can actually say sometimes he's a real pleasure to be around.

The same thing with the anxiety- if your son is suffering from intense anxiety that isn't being treated thats a problem. Many kids need a low dose anti anxiety along with their adhd meds in order to really thrive, just like we wouldn't deprive an adult with an anti anxiety medication if they were having crippling symptoms, so too a child. Studies have shown that kids who have their anxiety treated as kids have far less symptoms as adults then those who spend their childhood with debilitating symptoms that snowball straight into adulthood.

amother

Daffodil

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 12:49 am

amother Papaya wrote:

What does he take?