Switching to chalav Yisroel hard on the kids

amother

Wed, May 01 2024, 9:33 pm

[quote="tichellady"]Right, because it’s a chumrah for you and your husband. So you won’t eat the things you don’t want to eat but your children can[/quote

So yogurt? They like the chalav stam ones now. I should keep buying those?

tichellady

Wed, May 01 2024, 9:41 pm

[quote="amother OP"]

tichellady wrote:

Right, because it’s a chumrah for you and your husband. So you won’t eat the things you don’t want to eat but your children can[/quote

So yogurt? They like the chalav stam ones now. I should keep buying those?

Sure. I don’t keep cholov yisroael but I think that makes sense. Perhaps talk to a rabbi who you trust for advice. I think that once it becomes a special thing mom and dad do they may be more interested instead of feeling it’s forced on them

amother

Cyclamen

Wed, May 01 2024, 9:48 pm

. If you want to keep cholov yisrael in your house u can, and still buy treats for the kids outside the home. Just do it gradually dont make a big deal, buy lots of junk to compensate even if its more expensive. You want to send the message you are willing to pay $$ cause its for something important to u ( once kids r used to it can wean them off to normal level).

amother

Cyclamen

Wed, May 01 2024, 9:49 pm

[quote="amother OP"]

tichellady wrote:

I would first try to find replacements, ones they like maybe even buy the ones with candy to make the transition easier
Eta: but nothing wrong with the goal being only cholov yisroel in the home

amother

Wed, May 01 2024, 9:55 pm

amother Cyclamen wrote:

I would first try to find replacements, ones they like maybe even buy the ones with candy to make the transition easier
Eta: but nothing wrong with the goal being only cholov yisroel in the home

Right so chalav Yisroel in the home. Does that mean we only eat it in the home but we stock other stuff for outside the home? Or we don’t stock it in the home at all and if we are out we buy

amother

Cyclamen

Wed, May 01 2024, 10:03 pm

amother OP wrote:

Right so chalav Yisroel in the home. Does that mean we only eat it in the home but we stock other stuff for outside the home? Or we don’t stock it in the home at all and if we are out we buy

I would do the latter, I wouldnt bring in the home but that would be the end game, may have a little transition period where u buy some if you have a lot of pushback but phase it out

amother

Firebrick

Wed, May 01 2024, 10:04 pm

I would really be wary of forcing chumros on your kids, especially if they are 9 or older. Being frum is hard enough, no reason to make it harder for them.

amother

Wed, May 01 2024, 10:09 pm

amother Firebrick wrote:

I would really be wary of forcing chumros on your kids, especially if they are 9 or older. Being frum is hard enough, no reason to make it harder for them.

Right so I’m not trying to force anything. I’m not saying they can’t have those snacks. Just trying to figure o it how to navigate it so we can keep as much of chalav Yisroel as is possible but also giving them what they are used to

tigerwife

Wed, May 01 2024, 10:18 pm

amother Firebrick wrote:

I would really be wary of forcing chumros on your kids, especially if they are 9 or older. Being frum is hard enough, no reason to make it harder for them.

Just pointing out that cholov yisrael is halacha, not chumra. Every Halacha-abiding Jew must keep cholov yisrael, the opposite of which is cholov akum. Cholov stam is a loophole in countries with strong government involvement in the milking process (ask your LOR for your specific place). Absolutely allowed by many, but not the standard.

I agree with tichellady. Buy both options. From my experience, kids usually want to eat what their parents eat, often while said parent is still eating it. Lol.

Hashem_Yaazor

Wed, May 01 2024, 10:22 pm

Please seek hadracha on this to do it in a way that will be successful. I know many people who have various "outs" to ease it on their kids, and it's best to get guidance to figure out the best way to go about it. Kol hakavod for growing!

srbmom

Wed, May 01 2024, 10:24 pm

The families I know who have made the switch have never imposed it on their children of any age. If this is something you and DH want, then you and DH can make the switch. Let your kids eat whatever they want in and out of the house. It shouldn't be a big deal at all. For any cooking you can just as easily use CY products and they won't know the difference, but for snacks I think you're asking for something unfair from them. Many young adults will themselves make that decision to switch over once they get married

lamplighter

Wed, May 01 2024, 10:31 pm

For the household products CY only, then the yogurts, ice creams, snacks those you can transition slowly. It is a very common standard to keep a CY home but eat other snacks outside the house.
I do want to point out a big flaw in your response of CY being available. You absolutely do not want to cut down on CY snacks and treats because it's more expensive. The opposite! You show your kids how much you value CY that you are willing to spend more money or lots of money exploring the CY snacks and finding options they enjoy. Buy lots of CY options, not just copies of cholov stam snacks but whatever there is and make it fun!
I'm not saying they won't still want the other stuff but if changing to CY means they get less snacks and chocolates they will be super resentful super fast!

amother

Broom

Wed, May 01 2024, 11:01 pm

amother OP wrote:

Right but I’m buying the food. Definitely not mandating it at friends houses or outside. Just what I’m bringing into the home (school snacks).
No we aren’t getting stricter. We are always growing but growing doesn’t equal stricter. But this is something that we both value in our home

I think you are doing the best thing that you can do for them, both spiritually and physically. Hats off to you and dont get scared away.

amother

Hydrangea

Wed, May 01 2024, 11:02 pm

I grew up with my parents keeping CY, and the house being mostly CY, but the kids didn't have to keep it. some of my siblings chose to.
I'd say: you don't want to risk making them resent it. you and your husband start keeping CY (say bli neder). buy the same things you used to for your kids, unless there's a CY equivalent. ALSO have CY options. wait and see if they stick with only the old foods. if they gradually switch or find new things they like, you will gradually cut back on the chalav stam foods that you buy.

amother

Wed, May 01 2024, 11:04 pm

lamplighter wrote:

I actually didn’t say cutting down because of expense. This is something I hold very strongly. That Hashem will help out as we are trying to be better in this area.

lamplighter

Wed, May 01 2024, 11:09 pm

amother OP wrote:

Yes. We can get basically anything. But we may not buy as much of it because it’s more expensive. And also, they know you can’t compare anything to a Reese’s bar or Breuer’s ice cream Wink

also we buy a snack at Aldi called Swiss rolls. They like that, can’t find it in chalav Yisroel. Maybe I’ll just get for them to take to school but not way in the house as a way to transition

This is what I was commenting on.

keym

Wed, May 01 2024, 11:17 pm

I wonder if you can get your kids on board by having them weigh in on various foods.

Like maybe as a family, you'd all be willing to give up CS ice cream and replace it with Klein's but not the chocolate.
And then if it's successful, you broach replacing the yogurt and cheese.

I don't know. I feel like my kids would be more cooperative about giving up their favorite ice cream brands and replacing it with another if they knew that I wasn't running to take away their chocolate also.

Also, each child may have 1 or 2 CS things that they really can't give up, but they'd be fine giving up others.
They don't all have to eat the same stuff

amother

Wed, May 01 2024, 11:17 pm

lamplighter wrote:

This is what I was commenting on.

Ah ok. I guess I did say it. Not sure what I meant even, because definitely a priority to spend extra on chalav Yisroel.

amother

Pansy

Wed, May 01 2024, 11:22 pm

I don’t think you’ll actually get the pushback you’re expecting… as long as you’re willing to go slow and be flexible (with it sounds like you are) gradually changing brands of the products you buy shouldn’t be a huge deal. That happens every so often in my house, nothing to do with CY.

Like others said, start with you and dh. Let your kids know that you plan to transition your house to CY and why. Have them get involved in choosing new snacks/yogurts/chocolates and give them time if they have those one or two items that they absolutely don’t want to give up. I think it’ll be fine.

Ema of 5

Wed, May 01 2024, 11:33 pm

amother OP wrote:

But I’m buying the food for the house

I buy food for the whole house as well. My husband keeps cy, I don’t and the kids don’t. The things he will eat (milk, cheese, etc) I buy challah Yisrael. The things that he won’t partake of (ice cream, snacks, yogurt, etc) I don’t buy cy. I know it’s hard, but maybe you can do something like that for the kids? They’re still young, and this is definitely going to be hard for them. Also keep in mind that this is a decision that is being made for them, and they don’t really have a say. When my husband decided that he wanted to be makpid, I made it very clear that this was something that is only for him. If and when I or the kids wanted to switch, it would be up to us.