Has anyone missed their child's simcha????

y2kmommy

Sat, Nov 19 2005, 7:01 pm

I am ill right now and things aren't looking up for me so I may not be able to see my son get his haircut. I'm sure I could just be in bed and have my husband cut his hair, but I want so much for him to have a huge party!!! Has anyone missed their child's simcha due to illness?? A strange question - but need help - I'm becoming a wreck over the thought of it!!

Rochel Leah

Sat, Nov 19 2005, 7:49 pm

Is there a way that you could have the big party made with other peoples help and you sit down the whole time. My mom was in a cara ccident 2 weeks before my brothers upshernish,. she broke alot of bones and was not up to anything. her friends pitched in and made the party and she sat down near where my brother stood annd watched.

Tefila

Sat, Nov 19 2005, 7:58 pm

Rochel leah great advice yes can't you have a big party in your room or something that can accomadate all. This he will remember years to come most important if u can is mommy daddy being there the size and fancy is not going to matter later to him.
Refuah shlaimah otherwise how r you coping? here's hug for u since I wish I could give it to u right now ((((((())))))) Wink

Last edited by Tefila on Sat, Nov 19 2005, 7:59 pm; edited 1 time in total

ShiraMiri

Sat, Nov 19 2005, 7:58 pm

I was on bedrest for my son's upsherinish. I ordered groceries (chips, soda, fruit, pickles, etc) for delivery including fancy papergoods. My husband bought hotdogs, hamburgers and steak. He BBQd, my inlaws brought salad, we bought a cake. I sat the whole time. Our friend cut his hair in the house.

Order pizza, broil hamburgers or hotdogs, make it a simple party! I am so glad that we did.

Tovah

Sat, Nov 19 2005, 8:05 pm

for my bas mitzvah my mother was also sick on bed rest -not that this was a major simcha, but my grandmother made me a party in the house and my mother just sat on the couch.

also by my brothers bris, my mother called in the order and sat thru the whole thing.

don't worry, just order and have the party at your house, and if ur in the hospital have someone bring ur son to the hospital and finish there.

Tefila

Sat, Nov 19 2005, 8:07 pm

Gals she never said she was ill on bed rest so lets not assume and show more sympathy Crying

Tovah

Sat, Nov 19 2005, 8:09 pm

no one said she was on bed rest evreyone is just saying how they were on bed rest

sarahd

Sun, Nov 20 2005, 4:59 am

y2k, is it possible, as someone suggested, to have the party prepared by others (even catered, if it takes that) and you just be there? Or if that's not doable, then why not have the haircutting in your bedroom and the party elsewhere? So this way your son has the party and you get to see his hair cut and be in the pictures.

Refua sheleima. My thoughts are with you - it's a difficult situation.

BrachaVHatzlocha

Sun, Nov 20 2005, 10:42 am

you dont' have to have a big party. Have something small for family if you're up to being in the living room on the couch, as mentioned above. If even that's too much, then maybe just do the haircutting with your husband and kids. He can have a little party in school.
I don't think he'll resent not having a "huge" party.

buba123

Sun, Nov 20 2005, 2:39 pm

They have an organization in NY that hooks up the simcha with the choleh. They use special live hookups ( Question

). If possible ask family or friends to find out if this is available in your area. Refuah Sh'leima.

raizy

Sun, Nov 20 2005, 10:51 pm

I missed my sons bris. if that counts. I didnt send him off to his bris . instead I was in the hospital getting morphine for my pain... now I laugh at it . but then it was like a huge thing for me...

happyone

Sun, Nov 20 2005, 11:38 pm

live hook up sound like a great idea... call your local bikur cholim to see if they can arrange it. It needs a couple of days to make sure it can be set up, a phone line where the simcha takes place. permission from the hospital if you are hospitalized.
Hatzlocha,
this must be very hard for you.....

happyone

Sun, Nov 20 2005, 11:49 pm

why can't you cut his hair at the bedside with no big ceremony, and as soon as you feel better/up to it, you could make the big bash then...

imanut

Mon, Nov 21 2005, 12:07 pm

maybe you could have someone videotape it.
I was really sick after giving birth and the dr thought I should be back in the hospital and I said, "no, what about the bris?" and she answered, "if it needs to, the bris can happen without you."
b"h I made it to the bris, but our family did all the preparations.

jewgal84

Thu, Nov 24 2005, 5:04 pm

My mother gave birth on the same day my brother got engaged.

Double simcha!

But she couldn't attend his lechaim- yet she made all the arrangements from her hospital bed (and with help from her dear friends)- and it was a beautiful lechaim!

amother

Sun, Dec 25 2005, 10:24 pm

Everyone in our family always had small b-day parties or upshernishes with just family and the b-day boy/girl got to pick 1-2 friends to come over...and guess what? we were always happy because it was the quality of the get together/simcha, not the quantity so to speak. You can have a very special and stress free upshernish with just family, and your child will hold onto that forever, whatever it takes for his family (whom He loves) to be there.