Thank-you Gift | Imamother

MMEC123

Mon, Dec 26 2005, 11:08 am

We're going away for Shabbos to a friend with a number of little kids in a small house. I would like to bring a thank you gift beyond the typical chocolates/flowers/candy dish because I have tremendous hakaras hatov to them for something and want the gift to reflect my thanks. The problem is- it must be kid friendly and useful yet also beautiful and unique. I also want to buy something nice for her children but I don't know what they have and I don't want to get them something they already have so that has to be unique too. Any ideas? Please post!!

willow

Mon, Dec 26 2005, 12:00 pm

It's nice that you want to show your appreciation. Whatever you decide to give make sure to take the time to write a really nice note/letter.
You can get a beautiful vase filled with flowers, and surround it with those small dreidals filled with candy one for each kid. (B/c its that time of year).
Or if you know that your host wants or would appreciate a specific item say a salad bowl then get that and fill it with cute stuff.

chen

Mon, Jan 09 2006, 12:56 pm

As she has a small house and several small children, I would advise a gift that will get used up: food, toiletries--even disposable diapers! Otherwise your gift smacks of self-interest in that you want the gift to stick around in their house to make a lasting impression, rather than wanting the gift to be something your friend needs and can use. Another chachkeh to take up space, no matter how lovely or valuable, is the last thing a big family in a small house needs. Especially if the chachkeh is breakable!

Why don't you ask your hostess what part of the shabbos meals she would like you to bring? (Probably not soup unless you have really good leakproof containers!) If you put the food you bring into new plastic containers like tupperware, the containers can become part of the gift. You can bring an entire shalos seudos, say: bulkalach or bagels, and a variety of spreads and salads like lox, whitefish, herb-and-vegetable cream cheeses, babaganoush, and so on.

Friends of ours once brought us a carton full of various groceries. Some of the items were convenience or specialty things I'd not ordinarily buy myself--like a can of fried onions and a bottle of extra-virgin olive oil. Most of the stuff was ordinary non-perishables like peanut butter, cereal, and condiments. It was such fun, like being in camp and getting a care package from home. And every time I opened up a package of an "out-of-town" food item, it would remind me of their visit.

Another friend of mine brings "theme" gifts, such as an assortment of foods from a particular country, or a variety of cereals, or collection of spices, or a "portable tea party"--a selection of different teas and biscuits or tea breads like banana or date-nut, with maybe a bottle of honey or a pot holder or something related. If you want to express something special, you could write a poem or even just a note and enclose it with the package. If you don't mind being corny, you can say something like "food nourishes the body the way your friendship/support/help/understanding nourishes my soul," or "your friendship is the spice that adds flavor to my life". (Somebody stop me, I have been reading too many Hallmark cards!)

I don't know about you ladies, but I'd have murdered anyone who brought me a box of legos or any other toy with lots of small pieces. Not a jury in the land would have convicted me.