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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Infants
MommyLuv
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 Sun, Dec 27 2009, 3:01 pm
| EvenI wrote: | The biggest necessity is something for your baby to sleep in. You also need something to transport your baby from place to place. These can be one and the same for the first couple of months, if you get a stroller that has a bassinet. Or you may want to put your baby to sleep in a full size crib immediately so that you start as you mean to go on. Or you may not have room for a full size crib... There are different ways of doing things, to suit different people and different environments.
You might want a baby carrier or wrap. On the other hand, you might feel that you don't have the koach to carry your baby around so much.
Cribs and bassinets need mattresses and sheets. Then, you need something to keep the baby warm. Like blankets, or the equivalent. Baby sleeping bags are a nice alternative that a baby can't be smothered in. If you want to swaddle, you need the right kind of blankets for swaddling.
Think about how you will bathe and change the baby. There are various options and different baths and changing mats. And towels. Some people just put a newborn insert in a regular bath, but that means crouching while holding a newborn. Some people manage fine with their kitchen sink.
You need somewhere to put the baby when awake. Or a choice of places. A bouncer with toys on it can be great. A colorful blanket with interesting things on it for playing on the stomach. A jungle gym type thing for lying on the back.
Do you have somewhere to store the baby's clothes? If not, you might need some kind of new furniture.
You may need a pump, maybe electric, depending on your intentions and needs. You may want a sterilizer, but that's never really essential, I suppose, since you could sterilize in a pot on the stove.
Car seat, especially if you're in a country where they check you have one when you leave the hospital even in a taxi.
A diaper bag. |
that's a long list! Seriously, if you're going back to basics...your baby can sleep where Mom sleeps....no need for a full crib until the baby is older.
also, no need for a hundred places to 'put baby down'....The baby will probably be happiest being held. For me, a baby sling is probably the most important piece of equipment out there. Certain specific things can be helpful at specific stages, but aren't as necessary as Babies R Us and parenting magazines would have you believe.
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momoswyf
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Sun, Dec 27 2009, 3:09 pm
for me the #1 item was the Boppy and/or my brest friend. my 2 year old hijacked the boppy so we got the brest friend for 2nd. boppy is more versitile, but brest friend is better for nursing.
for now: car seat, crib, mattress, onesies and strechies, diapers, pump, baby bathtub (simple is fine), snap in go
for later: high chair, toys, stroller.
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shabbatiscoming
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Sun, Dec 27 2009, 3:12 pm
a swing. we got one when my daughter was 3 months old and wow, if we would have had that when she was a newborn, my nightlife with her would have been so much different. some nights I would leave her in there for a few hours at a time because that was the only thing that got her to sleep.
I would also say receiving blankets or whatever you call them, the size blankets for swaddling b/c I think swaddling, if your baby likes it, is very beneficial for adding more hours to their sleep, I know that worked for my daughter.
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EvenI
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Sun, Dec 27 2009, 3:39 pm
| MommyLuv wrote: | | EvenI wrote: | The biggest necessity is something for your baby to sleep in. You also need something to transport your baby from place to place. These can be one and the same for the first couple of months, if you get a stroller that has a bassinet. Or you may want to put your baby to sleep in a full size crib immediately so that you start as you mean to go on. Or you may not have room for a full size crib... There are different ways of doing things, to suit different people and different environments.
You might want a baby carrier or wrap. On the other hand, you might feel that you don't have the koach to carry your baby around so much.
Cribs and bassinets need mattresses and sheets. Then, you need something to keep the baby warm. Like blankets, or the equivalent. Baby sleeping bags are a nice alternative that a baby can't be smothered in. If you want to swaddle, you need the right kind of blankets for swaddling.
Think about how you will bathe and change the baby. There are various options and different baths and changing mats. And towels. Some people just put a newborn insert in a regular bath, but that means crouching while holding a newborn. Some people manage fine with their kitchen sink.
You need somewhere to put the baby when awake. Or a choice of places. A bouncer with toys on it can be great. A colorful blanket with interesting things on it for playing on the stomach. A jungle gym type thing for lying on the back.
Do you have somewhere to store the baby's clothes? If not, you might need some kind of new furniture.
You may need a pump, maybe electric, depending on your intentions and needs. You may want a sterilizer, but that's never really essential, I suppose, since you could sterilize in a pot on the stove.
Car seat, especially if you're in a country where they check you have one when you leave the hospital even in a taxi.
A diaper bag. |
that's a long list! Seriously, if you're going back to basics...your baby can sleep where Mom sleeps....no need for a full crib until the baby is older.
also, no need for a hundred places to 'put baby down'....The baby will probably be happiest being held. For me, a baby sling is probably the most important piece of equipment out there. Certain specific things can be helpful at specific stages, but aren't as necessary as Babies R Us and parenting magazines would have you believe. |
Yes, it's a long list - a list of various suggestions for various possible needs, which may or may not be applicable. OP might not know what she needs and might not know how she will do things yet. She might appreciate hearing how people manage and what they use.
If "something for the baby to sleep in" is Mom's bed, then that's taken care of. But that's only an if, and it doesn't change the fact that it is indeed essential: baby must have where to sleep, and for many people, that means buying a crib, bassinet, cosleeper, stroller, car seat, or something!
Similarly, not everyone copes best by holding a baby all the time, so I wouldn't just say you don't need anywhere except your arms to put the baby in.
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Ruchel
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Sun, Dec 27 2009, 3:48 pm
You need a light stroller. My parents bought me a very expensive one and I could barely push it! I went back and bought a cheap, light one and I'm still using it now! Only way to go long distances, or stairs.
| Quote: | | Similarly, not everyone copes best by holding a baby all the time, so I wouldn't just say you don't need anywhere except your arms to put the baby in. |
That. Few women are strong enough for that, I can't even imagine. I thought I was among the "not strong" ones but I see regularly women who can't carry even a newborn for more than 5 mins or so.
Same for bed, I know few people for whom "in the same room" would work (more than a few weeks at worst), but in the same bed?? Not even my very very overprotective doting spoiling parents ever did that with me. And I had my room pretty quick too.
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EvenI
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Sun, Dec 27 2009, 3:56 pm
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Oh, this is not equipment exactly and may not be for your registry, but make sure you get plenty of cloth diapers/muslins/whateveryoucallthem. They are very useful for all sorts of things, although you will use less if your baby turns out not be a spitter.
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YALT
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Sun, Dec 27 2009, 6:22 pm
| mali wrote: | | Inspired wrote: | | CARRIERS. Ring sling, wrap, and mei tai. | 
and a car seat, if you own a car
everything else depends on the baby. I didn't need a stroller, an infant seat, a crib/cradle or pacifiers for my last baby. an activity gym did come into good use at one point, but I wouldn't include it in the necessities list. |
where did/does your baby sleep? in your bed until he gets his own big bed?
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MommyLuv
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Sun, Dec 27 2009, 7:20 pm
EvenI, you gave great advice. My point was only that babies don't NEED as much as we think they do.
They need warm clothes and blankets, clean diapers, good milk, loving arms. The rest is variable and does not need to be waiting for you when you bring your baby home from the hospital.
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amother
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Sun, Dec 27 2009, 10:25 pm
| MommyLuv wrote: | EvenI, you gave great advice. My point was only that babies don't NEED as much as we think they do.
They need warm clothes and blankets, clean diapers, good milk, loving arms. The rest is variable and does not need to be waiting for you when you bring your baby home from the hospital. |
Yeah but moms need to function too! We can't be so idealistic! If a swing works, to put baby down for a few minutes, get a swing (or borrow one!) A mother has todo things that work for her in order to stay sane (obviously within the limits of keeping the baby comfortable!) If your arms are aching, get yourself a stroller, because you need those arms! IF you can't sleep with baby in your bed for fear of rolling on top of him, get a thingy to put baby to sleep in - don't be an ibber chuchim, because you'll end up in the pshych's clinic before you know it! 
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chatz
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Sun, Dec 27 2009, 10:39 pm
Do think about how much space you have around.
We almost bought a stroller with a separate bassinet piece, til my mother pointed out - where will we put the bassinet piece (a big clunker) once she outgrows it? If you have no storage space, don't buy extra pieces - either do without or borrow. Also with a crib - don't buy a smaller one for early on if you don't have place to put it once s/he graduates.
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MommyLuv
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Sun, Dec 27 2009, 10:43 pm
| amother wrote: | | MommyLuv wrote: | EvenI, you gave great advice. My point was only that babies don't NEED as much as we think they do.
They need warm clothes and blankets, clean diapers, good milk, loving arms. The rest is variable and does not need to be waiting for you when you bring your baby home from the hospital. |
Yeah but moms need to function too! We can't be so idealistic! If a swing works, to put baby down for a few minutes, get a swing (or borrow one!) A mother has todo things that work for her in order to stay sane (obviously within the limits of keeping the baby comfortable!) If your arms are aching, get yourself a stroller, because you need those arms! IF you can't sleep with baby in your bed for fear of rolling on top of him, get a thingy to put baby to sleep in - don't be an ibber chuchim, because you'll end up in the pshych's clinic before you know it! |
ITA, you need to have whatever works for you to make life with a baby easier. But that doesnt mean you must spend a fortune and clutter up your home with a swing, bouncer, baby gym, jumperoo, exercauser, carseat, crib, bassinet, pack n play, changing table, 3 different kinds of strollers, walker...
I've walked into people's houses where you can barely see the floor for all the baby stuff there. Sometimes less is more.
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Inspired
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Mon, Dec 28 2009, 7:26 am
| amother wrote: | | MommyLuv wrote: | EvenI, you gave great advice. My point was only that babies don't NEED as much as we think they do.
They need warm clothes and blankets, clean diapers, good milk, loving arms. The rest is variable and does not need to be waiting for you when you bring your baby home from the hospital. |
Yeah but moms need to function too! We can't be so idealistic! If a swing works, to put baby down for a few minutes, get a swing (or borrow one!) A mother has todo things that work for her in order to stay sane (obviously within the limits of keeping the baby comfortable!) If your arms are aching, get yourself a stroller, because you need those arms! IF you can't sleep with baby in your bed for fear of rolling on top of him, get a thingy to put baby to sleep in - don't be an ibber chuchim, because you'll end up in the pshych's clinic before you know it! |
If your arms ache get a carrier.
Do you have q previous mental illnes that you fear ending up needing help and you are projecting that onto others, "amother"?
Seems like you are using amother just to argue. Unless the personal info you revealed is your mental illness.
Every mother needs to weigh their needs and their babies and IMNSHO be open to seeing how things work rather than assuming the way things will be if they try xyz. And keep to your instincts and personal feelings. Don't let others convince you of things that you don't feel right (barring safety concerns) whether it be putting baby in the swing or holding the baby all the time. Every mother and every baby is different and will be happy with slight differences although all babies do need to be fed, diapered (or ECed), and kept warm enough. For their emotional development they need to attach to a consistant caregiver or caregivers and have at least a minimum amount of physical contact with him/ her. Until proven otherwise I will continue to believe that more attachment and more contact is better for most babies. Of course each parent has to decide for themselves how much is appropriate for their situation.
Yes I'm an "ibbur chuchum" and after using this parenting philosophy with all but my first child (because with that one I cared to much what others said) I have not yet suffered any bout of mental illness because of it.
I wish the posters on this site woyuld grow some ovaries and post with their screen names.
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Inspired
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Mon, Dec 28 2009, 7:30 am
| YALT wrote: | | mali wrote: | | Inspired wrote: | | CARRIERS. Ring sling, wrap, and mei tai. |
and a car seat, if you own a car
everything else depends on the baby. I didn't need a stroller, an infant seat, a crib/cradle or pacifiers for my last baby. an activity gym did come into good use at one point, but I wouldn't include it in the necessities list. |
where did/does your baby sleep? in your bed until he gets his own big bed? |
Yep, in my bed.
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the world's best mom
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Mon, Dec 28 2009, 7:34 am
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Everyone's needs are different. With dd, I was fine holding her almost all day. When I had ds, he screeched his head off all day, whether I held him or not. Sometimes, the only thing that calmed him down was the swing. Sometimes swaddling did the magic. I hardly used the swing for my girls, but ds was in it a lot. It also made a difference that he was my 3rd kid- I couldn't hold him all day because I had to take care of my girls too.
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DovDov
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Mon, Dec 28 2009, 10:03 am
Baby carrier.
What type depends on your comfort level and needs. With #1, I carried him in a wrap most of the time, because I wasn't comfortable using a sling and had the time for the most part to get myself wrapped. With #2, it was a ring-sling, because between two babies and the newborn not tolerating being put down for a second, I needed maximum speed and I found it left me more range of movement in one arm to lift the older kid. As he got older, we used the mei tai more often because I could carry him on my back and still get a lot done.
I know some people who swear by the Ergo and others who really don't like it for a little baby. I strongly recommend trying to get to a babywearing group in your area to try on the various types ahead of time to see what you're most comfortable with.
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sky
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Mon, Dec 28 2009, 10:49 am
If you plan on nursing a nursing cover is a wonderful. I just got one with dc#3 and wish I had it with the others. I am more comfortable talking to people and don't have to worry about a blanket.
I love this brand. http://www.bebeaulait.com/
(Most things I got for dc#1 I can't use any more because the other children would attack her. I.e. swing, bouncer, playmat. They were great for the first child but I can't use them too much anymore. But they are still nice to have for the first child)
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Rochelly
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Mon, Dec 28 2009, 10:51 am
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baby carrier and swing... both sanity savers for me!
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ven
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Mon, Dec 28 2009, 5:35 pm
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tiny love things are a hit here, a find a bugaboo a very handy thing (bit its so expensive) and my baby sleeps on a angelcare device with an alarm if anything should happen and baby stops breathing, that was so usefull for my peace of mind.
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shiradye
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Wed, Dec 30 2009, 11:39 am
There is 1 piece of equipment no one mentioned which I am so happy I bought. A Thermoscan ear thermometer. It wasn't cheap, but taking temp. of a sick baby, 2 seconds & you know if it's fever.
The swing was great for 4 kids, but it was useless for the past 2 babies.
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