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How would you explain yayin nesech to non jews?
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morah




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 9:43 pm
A friend of mine recently returned to work after having a baby and was greeted with a nice bottle of kosher wine. Well, sure enough, one of the non-Jewish coworkers grabs a corkscrew, opens the bottle, and starts pouring for everyone. Luckily for my friend, the wine happened to be mevushal, so she just smiled, thanked the coworker, and drank.
Anyway, it got me thinking: What if it hadn't been mevushal? What could she have said without insulting anybody? Heck, what would I do in such a situation?

Thoughts welcome from anyone- whether or not you have ever had to handle this kind of thing.
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Merrymom




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 9:48 pm
Gosh, please don't! There is no nice way of explaining it, look into the reasons why we do it. Just say I don't drink alchohol, it makes me feel ill or whatever.
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Tablepoetry




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 10:23 pm
Don't explain! I agree with Merrymom. It will sound offensive anyway you slice it. Just lift the glass to your mouth, don't drink. If anyone is nosy enough to ask why you haven't finished your wine, say you don't like alcohol/alcohol affects you in a bad way/gives you a headache - whatever.
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morah




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 10:33 pm
I don't know that I personally could get away with "not liking alcohol"- everyone who knows me knows that I can drink my husband under the table Very Happy It sounds like a good idea for other people though.

I was thinking that I might say that I don't care for that particular type of wine. Or that I'm on a diet. I guess you're right that it's better to come up with an excuse than to try explaining.

Like I said, this has never happened to me. Given that my friend had such a close call, I am just thinking about how I could react if I really did come across such a situation.
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sequoia




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 10:35 pm
I thought one wasn't supposed to drink while nursing.
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morah




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 10:50 pm
I'm neither nursing nor pregnant at this time. But I suppose that if I were in either situation, I could get away with it.
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sequoia




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 10:51 pm
Oh I meant your friend. Because she had just returned to work after having a baby so I assumed she was nursing.
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morah




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 10:52 pm
So I guess she could have used that. But she did drink the wine in the end (like I said, it was mevushal). Maybe it's ok to have a little?
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sequoia




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 10:54 pm
Yeah, a little is definitely okay, but it's a good excuse if one is preg or nursing.

Otherwise -- driving, antibiotics, antidepressants, bad hangover from last night...
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bluesclues




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 10:55 pm
I dont think I ever had wine that was not mevushal how common is it?
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mam




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 11:03 pm
explane this that u onley eat kosher things
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morah




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 11:05 pm
Non-mevushal wine is more fancy and expensive (and better!), which may be why you haven't come across it much. I keep it in the house and it kills me to open one for people who won't appreciate it (yes, I'm a wine snob. I wasn't kidding when I said I'm a good drinker...) I do have mevushal wine on hand for when I don't want to waste a good bottle.
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Raizle




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 11:06 pm
bluesclues wrote:
I dont think I ever had wine that was not mevushal how common is it?

some of the kedem wines in the larger size bottles are non mevushal.
It's easy to miss because the regular size is mevushal
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morah




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 11:09 pm
some of the kedem wines in the larger size bottles are non mevushal.
It's easy to miss because the regular size is mevushal[/quote]

Kedem makes non mevushal? Wow, I really am a wine snob! I was talking about the fancy French stuff...
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mltjm




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 11:19 pm
Agreed, don't explain it. There's just no nice way. Luckily, there are any number of non-offensive, valid reasons for excusing yourself for not drinking alcohol.
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Raizle




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 09 2010, 11:54 pm
morah wrote:
Raizle wrote:
some of the kedem wines in the larger size bottles are non mevushal.
It's easy to miss because the regular size is mevushal


Kedem makes non mevushal? Wow, I really am a wine snob! I was talking about the fancy French stuff


yeah I was wondering about your post when you said it was a fancy wine. Kedem isn't what I'd call fancy and it's the same wine as in the smaller bottle, just non mevushal.
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mimivan




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 10 2010, 12:02 am
how would I explain it to a [gentile]...I wouldn't!!

It's not a mitzvah to teach them Torah...I'd make an excuse to avoid embarrassment
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ora_43




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 10 2010, 4:54 am
I wouldn't explain in an office situation, but I would explain to friends or family (and have).

I would tell them that wine is considered special and is used for religious things (offerings, kiddush, havdala), and as such it's kind of like tefillin or something similar. Consecrated might be the word in English, I'm not sure... and in order to keep that status, it's only handled by people committed to serving Hashem (that last point is controversial, since IIRC there are those that hold that non-frum Jews can touch non-mevushal wine).

I don't think it's a very tough concept, since most people are familiar with at least one religion, and most religions have things that only followers are allowed to do. For example, a Catholic church wouldn't want me handing out the communion wafers.
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Raizle




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 10 2010, 7:33 am
ora_43 wrote:
I wouldn't explain in an office situation, but I would explain to friends or family (and have).

I would tell them that wine is considered special and is used for religious things (offerings, kiddush, havdala), and as such it's kind of like tefillin or something similar. Consecrated might be the word in English, I'm not sure... and in order to keep that status, it's only handled by people committed to serving Hashem (that last point is controversial, since IIRC there are those that hold that non-frum Jews can touch non-mevushal wine).

I don't think it's a very tough concept, since most people are familiar with at least one religion, and most religions have things that only followers are allowed to do. For example, a Catholic church wouldn't want me handing out the communion wafers.

The reason we don't have yayin nesach I always understood to be because it used to be used for avoida zara so if a [gentile] who worshipped that avoida zara touched the wine, he could have it in mind which would make the wine something we can't use anymore.
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smilingmom




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 10 2010, 7:34 am
I don't see the problem, most of my friends (including my best friends) are non-Jewish.

They all know the concept which is why I have become a connoisseur of beers.

The frum community lives in such a insular community, that they are no more shocked or insulted by Yayin Nesach, than they are by the reason I do not have a TV, have separate seating at my kids weddings, (which they attended with their husbands.) etc

It makes more logical sense than waiting six hours or Shatnez.
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