 |
|
 |
 |
|
|
Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Toddlers
amother
|
 Thu, Oct 21 2010, 3:12 am
|
I can't help but wonder if my 3 yo dd is stupid. I know it sounds mean, but she doesn't know her ABC's yet (she can sing them but can't recognize anything that isn't an "N" or "T" b/c that's the first letter in her name and her sister's name), and doesn't recognize numbers yet. this morning when I asked her which sippy cup of milk was hers she said" the blue one" (she was in the playroom and I was in the kitchen) but there was no blue one, one was pink and one was yellow ( 1 for her and 1 for her sister). I told her that there is no blue. so when she came to the kitchen, she looked at the cups and said the pink one. usually the pink one is for her sister so I asked her older sister and she said that the pink one was hers, not my 3 yo's. why would she just make that up? she wasn't saying it like she was playing around. she was serious. also, I tell her things one day and she forgets the next day. things that I tell her every day, like before she goes to bed I always tell her not to wake me up in the morning to blow her nose, she can do it herself. over and over I tell her, but yet she says that she didn't know that when I tell her in the morning when she woke me up to blow her nose. is this typical of a 3 yo? is she just mentally a little behind? the thing is that she's smart in other ways.she does this in other ways as well and it drives me NUTS!!
| |
|
| Back to top |
 0
 0
|
zipporah
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 3:20 am
| amother wrote: | | I can't help but wonder if my 3 yo dd is stupid. I know it sounds mean, but she doesn't know her ABC's yet (she can sing them but can't recognize anything that isn't an "N" or "T" b/c that's the first letter in her name and her sister's name), and doesn't recognize numbers yet. this morning when I asked her which sippy cup of milk was hers she said" the blue one" (she was in the playroom and I was in the kitchen) but there was no blue one, one was pink and one was yellow ( 1 for her and 1 for her sister). I told her that there is no blue. so when she came to the kitchen, she looked at the cups and said the pink one. usually the pink one is for her sister so I asked her older sister and she said that the pink one was hers, not my 3 yo's. why would she just make that up? she wasn't saying it like she was playing around. she was serious. also, I tell her things one day and she forgets the next day. things that I tell her every day, like before she goes to bed I always tell her not to wake me up in the morning to blow her nose, she can do it herself. over and over I tell her, but yet she says that she didn't know that when I tell her in the morning when she woke me up to blow her nose. is this typical of a 3 yo? is she just mentally a little behind? the thing is that she's smart in other ways.she does this in other ways as well and it drives me NUTS!! |
OK. You sound like you had a hard day. 
If she's meeting the minimum guidelines at her assessments, she's probably fine and maybe just difficult. Regarding ABC's, it's only been since Sesame Street that kids were thought capable of learning letters before kindergarten/ 1st grade. Are you working with her on this? If not, start or let it go... either way it's not a required skill for a 3 year old. And 3 year olds tell stories... I read in a book that you shouldn't call it lying, and that you should say something like, "You wish that were true." Is she physically capable of blowing her nose? We had to practice with our kids (6,4,2) , and they still pretty much wipe, but not blow unless I remind them.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
shopaholic
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 3:50 am
|
I really wouldn't worry. She doesn't need to recognize ABC's yet. As for colors, she'll pick it up.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
louche
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 4:53 am
|
She sounds like a perfectly normal three-year-old. In fact, she sounds like a very clever three-year-old who knows exactly how to get her own way. What better way to get Mommy to do for her than to claim to have "forgotten" yesterday's instructions?
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
shanie5
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 8:16 am
I wasnt sure if my dd was colorblind or didnt know her colors at all. When she was being interviewed for preschool, the teacher put a puzzle of different solid color pieces in front of her, and said what color is an apple. dd picked up the green piece-I only bought granny smiths, so the color was right. when asked what color a fire engine was she chose red. that is when I knew that she knew her colors, just not necessarily by name.
My niece new all the capitals of the 50 states-my brother and sil drilled it in to her. But as soon as they stopped drilling, she forgot them.
Your dd sounds very normal to me.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
maofboys
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 8:26 am
|
Your dd sounds just like my ds (also 3) I started working on is letters with him but you need alot of patience. I go through the letters in his name he gets them all right takes a drink of water and magicaly forgets everything we just did. I think it is normal one day it all just clicks.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
amother
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 8:36 am
|
Your expectations are pretty high. Each kid is different and it sounds like maybe your older child was a bit more advanced at that age so now you expect it from your other dd. Not fair or reasonable. I have a 2 yr old who right now is running circles around her 4 yr old brother as far as language and cognitive development. But that doesn't make ds stupid. It makes dd rather precocious.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
chocolate moose
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 8:50 am
|
Are yu sure that she can see well?
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
BeershevaBubby
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 8:52 am
|
I'm wondering... is she in nursery or playgroup, or home with you?
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
louche
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 9:02 am
|
BTW, it is really not a good idea to use the term "stupid" about your dd, even asking a hypothetical question, even online. It shows a certain negative attitude that may spill over into your relationship with your child. Ask if she's developing properly, if she's performing at age level, if she may have a developmental delay, if she's of normal intelligence, but please reserve the word "stupid" for politicians and drivers who cut you off on the highway.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
c.c.cookie
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 9:05 am
|
No, she's not stupid. She's three.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
Hashem_Yaazor
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 9:08 am
FWIW, my pediatrician only asked if they knew their colors at 4. (Despite the fact that they picked them up much earlier; I think it's not a reason for concern this young.)
I agree that she sounds like a normal 3 year old and there is no reason to suspect she's going to have learning issues.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
amother
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 9:17 am
|
My 3 year old doesn't either know his ABC's and numbers (though he knows his colors). My older children knew it by 3 but that is bec. I had much more time to spend working on it with them. And also every child is different, some pick up things faster than others. Have you or someon else tried to teach this? Even if not, she still seems to be very much in the normal range.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
BeershevaBubby
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 9:21 am
| amother wrote: | | My 3 year old doesn't either know his ABC's and numbers (though he knows his colors). My older children knew it by 3 but that is bec. I had much more time to spend working on it with them. And also every child is different, some pick up things faster than others. Have you or someon else tried to teach this? Even if not, she still seems to be very much in the normal range. |
Which is why I asked if she's in school or a school-like setting or at home. The OP doesn't say and she doesn't say if she's actually taught her daughter anything....
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
Ruchel
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 9:25 am
Maybe you should stop teaching her for a while or even let it all to the school, if it makes you so nervous. Not good for you or her.
Most kids don't know the alphabet so young, unless they are in a school or cheder actively teaching it, and even then...
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
shlomitsmum
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 9:35 am
OP attitude colors everything ....keep your teaching moments fun and not "performance based"
*ERASE the label stupid from your mind ,we have differently able people ,not stupid Eg: we have genius autistic kids ,kids with downs who are off the chart gifted in compassion and emotional intelligence ..etc .
*Get her tested
*Do not compare to sibling...it only hurts things
IMO
She sounds like an average 3 year old to me ....they pick what they are interested in paying attention ,it's up to you and her teachers to find out what makes her tick (visual ,audio,tactile learner) and use that as your teaching tool!
As a ECE I tell you ....Keep it positive and take your ego out of it .and NO NEGATIVE LABELS please .
It only hurts your bond and her self image...(and then she may end up on TV in her underwear ..just kidding  8)
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
amother
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 10:57 am
| amother wrote: | | I can't help but wonder if my 3 yo dd is stupid. I know it sounds mean, but she doesn't know her ABC's yet (she can sing them but can't recognize anything that isn't an "N" or "T" b/c that's the first letter in her name and her sister's name), and doesn't recognize numbers yet. this morning when I asked her which sippy cup of milk was hers she said" the blue one" (she was in the playroom and I was in the kitchen) but there was no blue one, one was pink and one was yellow ( 1 for her and 1 for her sister). I told her that there is no blue. so when she came to the kitchen, she looked at the cups and said the pink one. usually the pink one is for her sister so I asked her older sister and she said that the pink one was hers, not my 3 yo's. why would she just make that up? she wasn't saying it like she was playing around. she was serious. also, I tell her things one day and she forgets the next day. things that I tell her every day, like before she goes to bed I always tell her not to wake me up in the morning to blow her nose, she can do it herself. over and over I tell her, but yet she says that she didn't know that when I tell her in the morning when she woke me up to blow her nose. is this typical of a 3 yo? is she just mentally a little behind? the thing is that she's smart in other ways.she does this in other ways as well and it drives me NUTS!! |
I am biting my tongue here, and I think you've gotten to much sympathy from posters on here considering how aweful you sound asking if your DD is "stupid" and titling your post with that word.
I wont even discuss whether DD is on track because that is so not the problem.
I think whatever concerns you have about her intellegence and acting inappropriately, you need to turn around and ask about YOURSELF.
Dont you ever use the word stupid to describe a toddler, and even more so, when later in the same post you wonder if she is mentally behind. What planet do you come from that you could call a mentally slow child, or any child, stupid, for being behind in learning?
I am utterly disgusted. I hope your DD has some reliable adults to look after her well being.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
zipporah
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 11:02 am
| amother wrote: | | amother wrote: | | I can't help but wonder if my 3 yo dd is stupid. I know it sounds mean, but she doesn't know her ABC's yet (she can sing them but can't recognize anything that isn't an "N" or "T" b/c that's the first letter in her name and her sister's name), and doesn't recognize numbers yet. this morning when I asked her which sippy cup of milk was hers she said" the blue one" (she was in the playroom and I was in the kitchen) but there was no blue one, one was pink and one was yellow ( 1 for her and 1 for her sister). I told her that there is no blue. so when she came to the kitchen, she looked at the cups and said the pink one. usually the pink one is for her sister so I asked her older sister and she said that the pink one was hers, not my 3 yo's. why would she just make that up? she wasn't saying it like she was playing around. she was serious. also, I tell her things one day and she forgets the next day. things that I tell her every day, like before she goes to bed I always tell her not to wake me up in the morning to blow her nose, she can do it herself. over and over I tell her, but yet she says that she didn't know that when I tell her in the morning when she woke me up to blow her nose. is this typical of a 3 yo? is she just mentally a little behind? the thing is that she's smart in other ways.she does this in other ways as well and it drives me NUTS!! |
I am biting my tongue here, and I think you've gotten to much sympathy from posters on here considering how aweful you sound asking if your DD is "stupid" and titling your post with that word.
I wont even discuss whether DD is on track because that is so not the problem.
I think whatever concerns you have about her intellegence and acting inappropriately, you need to turn around and ask about YOURSELF.
Dont you ever use the word stupid to describe a toddler, and even more so, when later in the same post you wonder if she is mentally behind. What planet do you come from that you could call a mentally slow child, or any child, stupid, for being behind in learning?
I am utterly disgusted. I hope your DD has some reliable adults to look after her well being. |
That's not amother protocol. You criticize under your own name.
I think most of us realized she was saying it here so she didn't say it to her. It's called venting. So we just offered advice, and let it go.
I hope your venting is taken in the same vein.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
amother
|
Thu, Oct 21 2010, 11:06 am
| zipporah wrote: | | amother wrote: | | amother wrote: | | I can't help but wonder if my 3 yo dd is stupid. I know it sounds mean, but she doesn't know her ABC's yet (she can sing them but can't recognize anything that isn't an "N" or "T" b/c that's the first letter in her name and her sister's name), and doesn't recognize numbers yet. this morning when I asked her which sippy cup of milk was hers she said" the blue one" (she was in the playroom and I was in the kitchen) but there was no blue one, one was pink and one was yellow ( 1 for her and 1 for her sister). I told her that there is no blue. so when she came to the kitchen, she looked at the cups and said the pink one. usually the pink one is for her sister so I asked her older sister and she said that the pink one was hers, not my 3 yo's. why would she just make that up? she wasn't saying it like she was playing around. she was serious. also, I tell her things one day and she forgets the next day. things that I tell her every day, like before she goes to bed I always tell her not to wake me up in the morning to blow her nose, she can do it herself. over and over I tell her, but yet she says that she didn't know that when I tell her in the morning when she woke me up to blow her nose. is this typical of a 3 yo? is she just mentally a little behind? the thing is that she's smart in other ways.she does this in other ways as well and it drives me NUTS!! |
I am biting my tongue here, and I think you've gotten to much sympathy from posters on here considering how aweful you sound asking if your DD is "stupid" and titling your post with that word.
I wont even discuss whether DD is on track because that is so not the problem.
I think whatever concerns you have about her intellegence and acting inappropriately, you need to turn around and ask about YOURSELF.
Dont you ever use the word stupid to describe a toddler, and even more so, when later in the same post you wonder if she is mentally behind. What planet do you come from that you could call a mentally slow child, or any child, stupid, for being behind in learning?
I am utterly disgusted. I hope your DD has some reliable adults to look after her well being. |
That's not amother protocol. You criticize under your own name.
I think most of us realized she was saying it here so she didn't say it to her. It's called venting. So we just offered advice, and let it go.
I hope your venting is taken in the same vein. |
You misunderstand. I dont think its only a problem if she asks if her toddler s stupid to her face. I think it is a problem that she thinks/speaks that way even behind her back. That is not "venting" that is unhealthy.
| |
|
| Back to top |
0
0
|
|
Imamother may earn commission when you use our links to make a purchase.
© 2024 Imamother.com - All rights reserved
|  |
 |
|
 |
|
|
