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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Infants

Need chizuk!

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sped

Thu, Mar 10 2011, 1:48 pm

My heart is breaking Crying

. My little baby (10 months) is crying there in his crib... I know I am doing the right thing for him. Bedtime has been getting worse and worse. Last night 2 hours of rocking, patting, in and out of the crib, bottles, etc., until he fell asleep. I know this is the right thing to do for him, but still.... all he wnat is some rocking and patting and so on...... I go in every 5-10 minutes and talk to him, so he knows he is not alone, but still...
5 more minutes until I can o in.... Help Crying

yaeli83

Thu, Mar 10 2011, 4:03 pm

Ive been through the same thing and I know its hard, but I think that when you go in every few minutes, its probably making it worse. your ds probably just gets more upset when you leave again.

I cant say I have it figured out myself, but making some basic guidelines about when you go in and for how long will probably help you get through it. for example, when putting ds to bed for the night, say to yourself "ill spend half an hour, rocking, patting and feeding and if that's not enough time, then Ill let ds cry for one hour" or something along those lines. also be firm on when you decide to go in or not. if he wakes up in the middle of the night after he has been to sleep, do you go in or not?

after you set the rules, it may make you feel better about what you are doing. although hearing your child cry and knowing they just need help to get to sleep is always heartbreaking.

good luck!

underthestars

Fri, Mar 11 2011, 12:05 pm

I definitely empathize with you. I have been through this several times with different kids, and found that the best way to handle it was to let them cry (my first cried for 2 hours the first night, and each night subsequent was a little less until he finally just went to bed and slept). My youngest, who I coddled more and gave in to more, never learned to go to sleep well since, and she is now 9 yrs old. I wish I was as strong with her as I was with the older kids. Be strong, listen to music to overshadow the cries, wash dishes, fold laundry, etc. so your mind isn't always thinking about the baby crying. There is a good reason you are doing this, and you both will be happier in the long run.

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