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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Preschoolers
amother
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 Sun, Nov 20 2011, 7:24 am
My grandfather is not doing well at all. I have children aged 6 and younger. They know who he is but aren't particularly close to him because of proximity. They live 5 hours from us.
Should I take my oldest (daughter, just turned 6) with me to see him, probably for the last time?
Or should I just take my 6 month old?
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amother
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Sun, Nov 20 2011, 7:27 am
I'm the OP.
I wanted to add that I'll be going mid-week so it will entail missing school. I'm also afraid that it will make the trip much more complicated for me to achieve what I want for myself because I'd be on kid-schedule rather than free to do what I need.
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StrongIma
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Sun, Nov 20 2011, 9:50 am
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imo, taking a 6 yo for what could well be her last visit with a grandfather will make a lasting impression for life - she will have some kind of picture in her mind to attach to any stories that may be told about him and this would outweigh any school materiel she may miss for those few days.
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chanahlady
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Sun, Nov 20 2011, 10:24 am
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I would take them both. I agree with StrongIma, plus I'm sure grandfather would want to see his grandchildren. I remember going to visit my grandfather while he was dying in a hospital 6 hours away when I was a child. I missed school. But looking back, what sticks out in my mind isn't school, nor did missing school for a few days have any impact on my grades, or on my future -- what I do remember is being able to say goodbye to my grandfather.
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Ruchel
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Sun, Nov 20 2011, 11:31 am
To put another perspective: I wanted to see my cousin for the last time. She did not want to leave such image, and apparently even her children had to go by force.
My parents are also big on keeping a good memory of the person and "not being traumatized". My dad begged me as an adult (!) to not see a certain relative who was in a bad state.
You have to know your child and yur grandfather... And also the "state" of the person. And also if there are other memories.
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