Britney Spears bald

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Britney Spears bald

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chocolate moose

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 10:05 am

I just think that if YOU"RE not comfortable with it, you'd be better off discussing this with ppl who aren't going to gawk and ask a million questions.

amother

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 10:27 am

batya_d wrote:

Uh - so you had the same posek as another 'amother' that posken you aren't niddah after the chuppah? shock

[ok, I don't mean the chuppah, but you know.....sheesh]

Yes, this comment left me Scratching Head

There are rabbonim who hold that a betulah kallah is NOT niddah after first biah?[/quote] We had not managed to complete it, an we had to try again. We tried all through sheva brochos, and I ws still a virgin. (we had a hard tim e for the first month.)

DefyGravity

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 10:32 am

chocolate moose wrote:

I just think that if YOU"RE not comfortable with it, you'd be better off discussing this with ppl who aren't going to gawk and ask a million questions.

WithHumor isn't upset by the answers she's getting so why should she have her discussion elsewhere?

WithHumor is an adult, if she feels the need to take the conversation elsewhere, I'm sure she can do so without your needling.

elkayed

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 11:06 am

I read something about her hair up for sale on Ebay!

chocolate moose

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 11:18 am

And Defy, you feel the need to be mean to be because . . . .

lst

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 11:24 am

how is what defy said in any way mean??

can ppl just chlil out a lil here-sorry if Im speaking for her, but I dont think her intention was to get anyone upset. again ,she was just expressing on opinion

http://www.imamother.com/forum.....21561

withhumor

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 11:42 am

I’m enjoying this immensely, keep ‘em coming. Smile

chavamom

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 11:44 am

amother wrote:

um, it took us a week to complete the act.. dh was tired and nervous so couldn't do it properly.
we spoke to a rav after each and every night.
please don't judge

No judgment involved. Just the way it was worded - "couldn't wait to do it again the next night" - had me Scratching Head

and

. Esp. when we just had a thread about this - oh, nevermind, we don't need to go there again.

DefyGravity

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 11:52 am

chocolate moose wrote:

And Defy, you feel the need to be mean to be because . . . .

I'm not being mean. I'm just explaining why there's no need for WithHumor take her responses to the chassidishe forum.

You don't think there's anything wrong with constantly saying to people, "Oh, we've discussed this before" and also telling them where they should be posting?

amother

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 12:09 pm

I am chasidish, and I feel the need to explain things for those of you that don't understand.
yes it's hard to give up your hair ( my mother did it for me the first time, and my MIL was not there either was my gift!!!) HOWEVER I expected it and didn't question it... do I miss my hair sometimes? of course! am I greatful that I have no hair to wash and blow and tuck under my sheitle? of course!

WH wrote: Honestly, I think for a chassidsha girl, the 24 hours of the wedding day/night/next morning is the most traumatic process. You get married to a guy you spoke for 20 minutes… then you lose your virginity in a manner nobody ever explained to you in depth
this is a very general statement.
I can talk for myself I had the traditional "bashuah" meeting for an hour in my mothers home once in the afternoon then the next morning for another hour or so then we spoke breifly at the l'chaim then at the tenoim again... I was amazing at my chosson for his humor,charm and chen.
burach hashem I am happy close to 6 years now.
I would not call the wedding night traumatic I would call it romantic.
I can feel my heart beating quicker just by thinking of that special night! Is it a hard day? of course it is!
fasting, davening, dressing, pictures, dancing... and wearing that heavy heavy gown... yes and you are nervous about doing the "thing" oh please tell me that only chasiddisha girls are nervous....

please with humor don't blanket statement all chasiddisha ppl. should you choose to you can talk for yourself and your expirence.

mimsy7420

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 12:11 pm

DefyGravity wrote:

You don't think there's anything wrong with constantly saying to people, "Oh, we've discussed this before" and also telling them where they should be posting?

I agree, it's really annoying.

amother

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 12:17 pm

amother wrote:

I'm chassidishe too, VERY chassidish, and funny, I wasnt the least bit traumatized.

I was nervous at my wedding for what awaited me after that, but I found the first night to be kind of a surreal experience - awkward, uncomfortable and weird, but couldnt wait the next day to do it again that night! and losing my hair - awesome right of passage, now I was a married woman like all the other married women in my community. and my mother in law wasnt present, and I didnt get a brooch.

Not everyone finds all this so traumatizing. My kallah teacher explained it beautifully and it wasnt traumatizing. She explained it as major kedusha, the holiest mitzvah you can ever do, even calling the male organ the 'heilige eiver'!! Dunno what to tell you...

Same here. wasn't at all traumatized, and I dont see how I could have been any 'more prepared' (without having practiced the act beforehand).
I shaved myself with nobody around, and I did not feel that I deserved a present for that! and I have NO problem looking in the mirror either. I think its much more comfy wearing a shaitel like that.

'With', I think you're making some of the people out there think that we all dread it and do it begrudgingly, which is so SO NOT the case.

chocolate moose

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 1:00 pm

I don't think saying we've discussed this before is annoying.

I think it's helpful,. Becaue then, the OP can go and read what we said when the subjet was fresh!

DefyGravity

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 1:02 pm

If you really wanted to be helpful you would either bump the old thread up, or include a link to the old topic. By simply saying, "we've discussed this before" you just come off as sounding snooty.

chocolate moose

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 1:03 pm

I never just say that.

DefyGravity

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 1:07 pm

I guess my memory's off. I seem to remember seeing this from you very consistently.

amother

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 1:23 pm

chocolate moose..........YOU DEFINITELY DO THAT!
someone starts a thread, and you respond "this has already been discussed" or "not to sing an old tired song or anything"....etc.
well what are we supposed to do before starting a thread........search the entire imamother website's archives and read every single post that has ever been posted to make sure that's we're not repeating a thread!? sorry but who has the time to do that? some users here are new and may not realize that a topic has already been discussed, and also some topics were discussed a couple of years ago and new users bring new discussions. you automatically make the OP feel bad about themselves. they start a new thread, which they are excited about and feel is interesting, and you usually are so quick to respond "this has already been discussed". please stop doing it.......it is VERY annoying.

mimsy7420

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 1:25 pm

DefyGravity wrote:

I guess my memory's off. I seem to remember seeing this from you very consistently.

your memory is not off

chocolate moose

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 2:50 pm

If I say that, it's obvious the OP should do a search. If she doesn't know what that is, then it's the perfect time for her to learn!

DefyGravity

Tue, Feb 20 2007, 2:55 pm

The search function on imamother isn't very good. I've used it many times and it's not helpful at all.

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