Outrageously outlandish things people have said to you...

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saw50st8

Tue, Oct 28 2014, 9:38 pm

Someone once told her daughter (while I was sitting across the table) "Modern Orthodox Jews are people who don't learn Torah."

joy613

Tue, Oct 28 2014, 9:50 pm

saw50st8 wrote:

Someone once told her daughter (while I was sitting across the table) "Modern Orthodox Jews are people who don't learn Torah."

Did you say anything?

bnm

Tue, Oct 28 2014, 10:25 pm

2 different people in last 24 hours 'you got bigger than last week'. Well that explains my backache....

FranticFrummie

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 2:54 am

Didn't happen to me, but to a friend of mine. She was at her son's wedding, and she had her makeup done professionally. She's normally a down to earth, outdoorsy type who never bothers with "girly stuff".

A random relative came over to her and said "Wow, I've never seen you look pretty before!"

shock

I asked her how hard she hit him, but she said she just laughed at him. She has more restrain that I would have.

Iymnok

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 3:16 am

Smiling Wife

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 6:54 am

abcd123 wrote:

While at work talking with a client she saw photos of my kids on my desk and questioned me about my work schedule and when I proceeded to tell her that I work full time she responded " wow.... So..... When are you their mother?".... I walked out of the room and asked one of my colleagues to take over that clients appointment so that I don't get fired for saying something nasty right back at her

Wow! sorry about that, being a student mom I empathize! I can't believe these pple!

vintagebknyc wrote:

because it's an offensive slur.

I hear that, it is a controversy and I stand on the side that it is not degrading, but like the N word if someone thinks it is then it is. Ok.

dr. pepper wrote:

I am reading this with my mouth open! Besides basic manners and etiquette of not talking about someone, especially in front of them, we have the extra mitzvah of welcoming a ger/giyors and taking special care not to hurt them!
I am amazed at your strength of character to realize it's her issues and insecurities but feel so embarressed on behalf of FFB jews, I just wanted to send you a hug and standing ovation!

thank you!

debsey

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 7:42 am

Story One: I was expecting twins. We were not sharing that it was twins yet. At a wedding, someone yelled from across the room "How many babies are in there? You're HUGE." When I smiled and shrugged at her, she yelled it again, louder. "There's GOT to be more than one baby in there. You look like a cartoon." (Huh?)

Story Two: (To be fair to the guilty, I had gained a lot of weight with that twin pregnancy, so I went from normal to quite overweight and couldn't really shake the weight)
I met a colleague when I was halfway done losing weight (I had lost 40 lbs of what would eventually be a 90 lb weight loss)
Her "I've never seen you so skinny. Did you lose weight?"
Me: Thank you, yes, I'm working on it
Her: I mean, not that you're SKINNY skinny. You still need to lose. Rolling Eyes

Me: Polite noise
Her (can't figure out how to dig herself out so figures, go for the broke) I mean, you're still sort of fat, but you're skinnier than you were. You were SO fat then
Me: Polite noise
Her: I mean, you're not FAT now. You're just not SKINNY yet. I mean, are you planning on staying on the diet?
Me: I see my husband signaling me from the mechitza.

Notsobusy

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 8:51 am

Debsey, reminds me of a conversation I heard between two women.
"Wow, you lost so much weight I didn't even recognize you"
"Thanks but I didn't lose that much weight"
"You did, you were so fat before"
"No, not that much weight"
"Oh yes, you lost so much weight you are unrecognizable"
At that point I felt so bad, I interrupted them with a stupid question just to shut her up.

imaima

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 9:20 am

A friend of mine saw a woman at a chassene and complimented her "Hey you've lost so much weight!"

Two months later that woman died of cancer.
The friend swore off ever commenting on anyone's weight again...

Chayalle

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 10:02 am

Debsey, you lost 90 lbs.?!!! You are awesome!!!

My older sister struggles with weight. She and I can eat the same thing, and she jokes she gets 2 for 1 (2 lbs. for every 1 I get.....). It's really a metabolic thing.

So we have a relative that is not known for her tact. Make that, she is known for her lack of it.

This was years ago, before sis was in the grandma stage. Relative comes over to sis.

Relative: So when are you due?
Sis: I'm not expecting right now.
Relative: Well, you can probably understand why I thought you were.

And at dessert, she tells sis - don't you think you should skip that?

Make that - nasty.

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 11:01 am

And when my son was 1.5:

"Don't you think it's time for your son to have a sibling?"

(I was newly pregnant, but she didn't know. And if I was wasn't? Either it would be by choice, which would be none of her business, or not by choice, in which case it would've been very hurtful.)

greenfire

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 12:42 pm

someone once told me they didn't like my new eyeglasses ... hello if they're on my face chances are I like them - in the store would be a different reaction Nerd

June

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 1:18 pm

my mil, when I was very newlywed: "you know, as much as you love your spouse, you'll never love them as much as you love your parents."

naturalmom5

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 1:22 pm

Iyh
You should become a calla bimheira
Byumeinu. Or at least byumeinu

Then she says
IN MY LIFE

😁

debsey

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 1:23 pm

Chayalle wrote:

Wow, I seem to have hit a nerve. Chayalle, glutenless - What is it about weight that brings out the tactlessness in people? I wanted to quote Winston Churchill to her - you know - "I may one day lose weight, but you will always be tactless...."
Yes, I lost 90 lbs - thanks, Chayalle. A lot of hard work and a decision that this is my lifestyle now. Right now, I have 20 more to lose from my last baby, but slow and steady is the answer for me. I am very low carb, fairly low calorie, and I work out most days.
It is NOT OK to comment on people's weight. If you want to say "wow, you lost weight, well done" then say THAT and keep it there.......
While we're on the subject, I am now thinner than one of my teenage daughters. A saleslady in a store said to her "So, I need to get you a bigger size skirt than your mother. Doesn't that feel weird?"
Let's just say she did NOT make a sale.

allrgymama

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 1:32 pm

When I found out that there was no heartbeat during my third pregnancy, I tried desperately to get through to my best friend (who had already been AWOL for a couple of weeks prior). Not only did I really need a friend, I needed someone to watch my kids while I was at the doctor (finding out that there was no heartbeat).

Two weeks go from the mis and she finally calls me back and just starts talking excitedly and then interrupts herself to inform me that she was expecting and didn't I realize that that's why she wasn't available?

And I started sobbing hysterically and she wanted to know why I didn't sound happy for her at all and I told her about the mis and, her response:

'I can't believe you're doing this to me!"

(I gave myself a couple of weeks to calm down and then went over to see her and articulated as best as I could all the ways that that was wrong and hurtful and selfish and every other thing you could think of for why that SHOULDN'T be the best friend's reaction and we've moved on.)

bat1

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 1:39 pm

Chayalle wrote:

MAKE THAT WAY WORSE THAN NASTY, I don't where you meet such people! G-d Help!

Barbara

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 1:46 pm

The night before the bar exam, I'd had it with studying, so I took a break to sit outside with my parents. Their neighbor (whom I'd know since birth, and whose daughter had been my best friend since we could babble) said, "they'll probably ask you all the things you didn't study for anyway." Gee, thanks.

I'd always walked in the shadow of my brilliant, well-behaved, perfect brother. Every year, it was the same thing. "Ahhh! You're Steven's sister! Steven was so wonderful. I hope you're half the student he is!" Bad enough. Until one year, I got a teacher who didn't like him. "You're Steven's sister? Well, you don't seem anything like him, so I guess that's OK." Yo, Lady. We squabble like I don't know what, but he's still my BROTHER. How am I supposed to react to that?

Chocomama

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 1:47 pm

In my 9th month, my MIL told me I look like I'm having twins. I just laughed and said no just one in there.

Except secretly I wanted to punch her. So then, I picked a fight with my DH about his dumb mother. I probably should have just gone with the punch Wink

cuties' mom

Wed, Oct 29 2014, 5:15 pm

Almost a month after I had my oldest, a neighbor asked me, "Aren't you past your due date? When is that baby coming out?" I answered that the pidyon haben is the next day. The neighbor said, "Mazel tov! What did you have?"

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