Tell me about Bergenfield/Teaneck

amother

Green

Wed, Apr 15 2015, 1:14 pm

We are looking to move from OOT and heard the Bergenfield/Teaneck community would be good for us. My husbands company has an office in queens, so we dont want to be too far. A little about us: Husband is BT, wears black hat, works in high-tech. We're not necessarily the Bais Yaakov type, but looking for a frum education for our kids (ages 2 and 4). No TV in the house. I wear denim skirts but stockings every day. We're a little out of the box. Any ideas or thoughts? Thank you!

amother

Ivory

Wed, Apr 15 2015, 4:25 pm

I live in Teaneck, Daven in Beth Aaron. I can't vouch for all the shuls here but ours is an extremely warm and friendly place. The crowd in Teaneck is very diverse but I wouldn't say the majority are black hatters. I would say, however, that a black hatter would be welcome. There's no in town pressure and most people are happy with being friends despite their differences. We don't have children yet so I can't advise you school wise.

shabbatiscoming

Wed, Apr 15 2015, 9:29 pm

amother wrote:

I just wanted to say that I love reading posts like this. I grew up in teaneck and went to beth aaron and love reading comments like this. And about the shul too. Smile

Its wonderful that this community is still as warm as I remember it growing up Smile

amother

Emerald

Thu, Apr 16 2015, 7:16 am

I live in Teaneck. We are very happy here.

It's a big mix of people. There's no one here that's really the same which allows all different types to feel comfortable. When we moved in we were told it was a very YU community and that is true, many people have been to YU but I don't agree that should be the only way to describe it. People say that Bergenfield has a frummer crowd but I think that may just be stereotyping and I can't say if it is true or not. Frankly, we are all torah observant.

The best would be to come out for a Shabbos and visit.

For the record, I only wear skirts and cover my hair. No we don't wear socks all the time but no one is looking at your feet. My husband wears a black hat and learns every night in shul or with a chavrusa. We own one TV that my kids don't get to watch and we don't listen to English music. None of that is an issue for them at school. The point is that this is a community where people don't look and judge you on that kind of thing - a very solid plus in my book.

amother

Green

Thu, Apr 16 2015, 10:37 am

OP here. It's not that we're so out of the box, I think we're just more to the right, than "right wing YU" but we're not SO much to the right that we would fit in in a complete black hat/yeshivish community. I wear a long sheitel, am into fashion/color, wear pencil skirts, but my husband wears black and white, has peyos (behind the ears), dont touch in public, so we're just not one particular "type", but I think we're more to the right than "right wing YU".

YNJ might be a great school, which is definitely important, but I don't want to feel like the odd ones out if we dont have a tv and my husband has a beard/peyos and I wear stockings. I would rather be in a community with people who hold similar hashkafah. I agree a non-judgmental community is important, but for me, being in a community that is TOO diverse tends to give me feelings of "sliding" in my religious observance as things always seems greener on the other side. I know that's my personal issue, and I'm working on it, but if I'm surrounded by too many people with tv's, no hair coverings, more modern lifestyle, its too hard for me.

We thought about queens, but we already have 2 kids and 1 on the way, and renting an apartment doesnt seem too enticing at this point, and housing for purchase seemed very limited. I also don't think I want to settle down in such a city-like area, we want something more suburban.

Thank you all so much for your responses! We have a lot of research still to do!

mille

Thu, Apr 16 2015, 3:27 pm

amother wrote:

Fit aside (and it does seem Bergenfield/Teaneck is not exactly what you're looking for), Bergenfield --> Queens is not the best of commutes.
Some more options:
Kew Garden Hills/YCQ
Monsey/I think there's a bus to YNJ?
Staten Island/JFS

I don't want to comment on Teaneck because I really really hate most of Teaneck (sorry Teaneck folk! It's just not for me!), unless OP wants that side... But I did want to say that commuting to queens from Teaneck area is NOT a great commute at all. Actually, I'd say it's a pretty awful commute unless the hours are completely outside of rush hour. I knew someone who commuted to queens college from bergen county, and it could take multiple hours if it was anywhere between 7am-10am or 330pm-6pm. If your husband needs to work in queens, I would suggest looking at queens itself, the 5 towns, or something else.

If you want an out of the box feel (but maybe a little too far to the left? not sure because black hat can mean a lot of things...), look at new hyde park on the border of queens and long island. It's pretty much an out of town community but "in town".

rosenbal

Thu, Apr 16 2015, 8:51 pm

Agree about Passaic/Clifton. Has mix of yeshivish, BT, right wing YU. Has 2 schools...the more "left wing one" is supposed to be great and is still to the right of YNJ. I think the hashkafa is more your speed and you and your kids would fit in more. Not that you'd necessarily be uncomfortable on Bergenfield/Teaneck, but you could continue with your standards more easily without feeling backlash from your kids for being different etc.

I don't live in the area though but the commute from NJ to Queens does sound daunting. If you're OOT, you're probably not familiar with the horror of traffic and you really, really can't judge commutes by miles alone. Try posting questions about Bayswater, Q Garden Hills, Far Rockaway, etc so u get more feedback on those communities.

saw50st8

Fri, Apr 17 2015, 5:56 am

amother wrote:

Your best bet is to contact some of the shuls and go for a shabbat visit. It sounds like you would prefer Bergenfield. Maybe check out Beis Medrash of Bergenfield (I've never been there but I know people who are happy there) and it's definitely further to the right. There is also a Teaneck Kollel but I don't know much about it. It's definitely more right wing than most people in Teaneck.

You definitely sound more to the right than most people I know in Teaneck. Most people have TVs, most kids watch TV.

Many in areas in Teaneck are very warm and inviting. We daven at Arzei Darom and it's definitely friendly. My friends are very diverse and that's a good thing for me. It doesn't sound like a good fit for you though. If you want to be in a place with a very similar hashkafa, then Teaneck doesn't sound like the place for you.

tovli toraspicha

Fri, Apr 17 2015, 6:09 am

Is there a specific reason why you are looking into the New Jersey area? Because as was mentioned earlier, the commute from Teaneck/Bergenfield, Monsey, or Passaic to Queens is no picnic.
North Woodmere is a closer commute if you are looking for larger house for lower buying price (although I think someone mentioned that you should look into the differences in taxes as well- between property taxes and income taxes, etc.) and also seems to fit in more with how you were describing yourself hashkafically. You do get the whole 5 towns package as well, but there really is a mix of people there to a certain extent.

And if you find a community with good schools, low housing prices, welcoming people in the area close to queens, I would love to hear about it Smile

amother

Mauve

Fri, Apr 17 2015, 8:03 am

I live in Passaic (I've been here about 10 years) and I have to say that it is an incredible community. The people that move here are generally looking to grow spiritually and don't want their kids to have too much exposure to secular influences. There is so much chesed here, and famiies are pretty low key.

The women here really try to maintain a higher standard of tznius and until recently pencil skirts were not even really something seen in Passaic (and many are not happy about it). Obviously in any community there is somewhat of a diverse range of religious levels, but people here really try to be respectful. When I first moved here I dressed in a way more "funky"fashion- I wore pencil skirts, long wavy wigs, no stockings etc... But the community had an influence on me as I noticed so many wonderful women really trying to to be sensitive to tznius. On went the stockings, the wig got much shorter and the skirts longer!

I think when moving to a community it's very important to be sensitive to the standards of dress that are already there.

I have friends that live in both Bergenfield and Teaneck and it is definitely more religiously diverse that in Passaic. It's also a wonderful community with many different types of people but I don't think it's considered very yeshivish (Passaic has areas that are definitely very yeshivish).

The commute from both Teaneck and Passaic to Queens is probably not an easy one! It would probably make a lot more sense for you to look in the 5 towns area which has an extremely diverse crowd.

Good luck!