Only Frum Jew in office

cbsp

Tue, Nov 17 2015, 5:23 pm

There's a lot of valuable advice here. I just want to add that it's very helpful to ask many shaylos, preferably in anticipation of a scenario. Also realize that things that seem so obviously ok might really be problematic.

For example, my group was having an end of year meal together at a very non kosher restaurant during work hours. I happened to have mentioned it to my Rov in passing, reassuring him that I'd be bringing my own food. I was stunned to hear that there's actually a problem with bringing food that looks like it could have come from the establishment. He recommended a granola bar, preferably with a wrapper. (There would have been a problem with ordering even a kosher alcoholic beverage, but I stuck to a can of ginger ale).

In terms of interacting with your colleagues, I found that working with non Jews was sometimes easier than a secular Jew or someone who, albeit observant, has different standards or lifestyle (I recall the frum boss who couldn't understand why getting home on a Friday with less than 45 minutes to shkiyah(!) was unacceptable). My analogy for Shabbos prep was "think it as a weekly thanksgiving dinner."

I was in a support position. I made sure to be extra available for all holidays, even those I would have maybe wanted to take as a vacation day (like Jul 4). I once scheduled to be on Dec 25 not realizing it was 10 teves. That was fun. The idea is to acknowledge that concessions are being made and to attempt to make it "fair" somehow. Do not act entitled, it will not endear you to your colleagues and superiors.

Hatzlachah!

Last edited by cbsp on Tue, Nov 17 2015, 6:24 pm; edited 1 time in total

amother

Slateblue

Tue, Nov 17 2015, 7:06 pm

I am the only frum woman in my job. If I meet new ppl. and a man puts out his hand to shake mine, I say, "I don't shake hands for religious reasons." (Some ppl. never heard of this and others understood especially when they saw how I was dressed.)
Sometimes, I got a hard time leaving early Friday but I made sure to always be flexible to make up the time other days/hours... I have to work chol hamoed but of course take off for the yom tov days. I also have good attendance so that makes up for them being upset about me leaving early.
Yes, I agree it is a good idea to ask shailos about sticky job situations. But, it is so hard to get through to rabbis to have enough time to present these shailos (but this is my problem).

A lot of employee social gatherings were on Sat./Fri night, so I did not go. One boss who was disgusting to me, tried to use that against me and ignored the part about me being reiligous.....

I feel that the hardest thing for me is the employee gatherings. The employees are like family and although they are nice, I don't relate because our lives are so different.... They all assume that of course all the employees will attend the gatherings and get insulted when I don't. It is awkward but there is no way around it!! I can't go to a non-kosher restaurant... or to a get together for x mas.....

I think you should def. take the job. I am sure it will take time to adjust but so many ppl. work in jobs where she is the only frum person!!!

good luck!!