Rejection hurts | Imamother

amother

Lemon

Sun, Nov 22 2015, 3:19 pm

I went on a job interview about 4 weeks ago.

When 3 weeks went by with no response I figured I didn't get the job and moved on mentally. I also realized that this job had a number of drawbacks (low pay, long commute).

Today I got a call that they decided not to offer me the job.

Even though in my own mind I had already come to the same conclusion, it still stings. Now I'm second guessing myself and wondering what they found wrong with me. She told me that it was a group decision and some were strongly in favor, some not so much in favor. But whatever.

How do I keep myself from brooding over this?

amother

Pearl

Sun, Nov 22 2015, 3:23 pm

Rejection hurts so much but it is Gods way of saving you a lot of heartache. He knows that the job is not a good fit for you and doesn't want you to have to suffer through working in a place that ultimately won't work out. That's how I look at rejection - whether it be a job or any other kind... (I dated for too many years...)

amother

Lemon

Sun, Nov 22 2015, 3:39 pm

amother wrote:

Thank you for that.

It does help a little.

mille

Sun, Nov 22 2015, 4:00 pm

I totally get it, OP! I went on a few interviews before my current job, and I cried when I got a rejection email from a place I interviewed for. The interviews were SO long with a bunch of people, I really felt like I had a shot, I thought I got along well with everyone... And then I just got this really impersonal email saying they decided to "move forward with another candidate".

What helped me get over it was, honestly, thinking rationally about the job (like yours, mine also had a lot of drawbacks - focus on those!) and continuing to interview until you land a job. I landed my current job which is SO perfect for me in EVERY way, and I am so so glad I wasn't chosen for that last job, or I would have never even interviewed for my current position!! Try to stay positive even if it's hard - it could be that the perfect thing is just around the corner for you!

amother

Lemon

Sun, Nov 22 2015, 4:05 pm

mille wrote:

I'm glad you have a happy ending Mille!

In my case we are trying to relocate outside of NYC. I have a good job here but it is so hard to live squashed with a large family in a tiny apartment. Still I was torn about whether moving now is a good decision, figuring out where to move, if this is the right community, the right job etc.

I guess Hashem is showing us the answer that the right thing for us is to stay put for now. So I just have to put up with living in tight quarters for however long is necessary... Sad

mille

Sun, Nov 22 2015, 5:18 pm

amother wrote:

Keep looking. I don't think one rejection is enough of a 'sign' that you should stay put. It just might have meant that this particular position wasn't right - but keep your eyes out. You never know when you might fall upon your dream job in the right location Smile

purpleonion

Sun, Nov 22 2015, 5:56 pm

Totally agree , it took me quite some time till I landed in my current job .
I can totally relate to the feeling of being rejected , it hurts . And thinking about the negatives from that place does help a lot .
Just be patient and don't give up . That's the trick .
Loads of luck

imasinger

Sun, Nov 22 2015, 7:14 pm

Baseball players are stars if they don't get a hit 50% of the time. Broadway stars and writers all have many, many, many more rejections than acceptances.

Failure is a vital part of life. It actually is a gift, if you can find the things that you were meant to learn from it. (Sometimes, that takes years to realize).

We all experience it. Yes, it hurts. But it helps us remember that we have room to grow, whether towards a different career, or in some other way. And it makes the successes all the sweeter when they come.

This, too shall pass. Hug