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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> School age children
amother
Seafoam
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Mon, Apr 23 2018, 4:26 am
The title says it all.
We live in a Chassidic dominated Kehille (very warm and nice with chassidish rebbes also for our nonchassidish children).
We enjoy it very much and DH got used to the nussach and zmonim, we feel welcome and integrated and love the schools our children are in. SO eventhough we are kind of outsiders, there are many outsiders like us here and it really works nicely.
our first Chimashseude is coming up and us being BT and never having attended one before, we ask ourselves WHAT IS AWAITING US???
Our ds is superexcited, sings and practices and his rebbe is very pleased with his preparation (all in yiddish we have no clue whta he is saying ) - and it is such a big event for him.
we want to be happy for him and with him and dont wanna spoil it. our parents and some family members will attend the seude too, so ds is very happy and looking forward. but to what exctly???
pleas please experienced mommies brief me of what to expect.
thank you!!!
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amother
Crimson
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Mon, Apr 23 2018, 4:43 am
Sorry- I don’t know
I have only attended Chumash seudas
I’m assuming they’re the same
You go a sit and watch as your son and classmates perform
Afterwards the rebbe and principal give each boy his Chumash
Sometimes the fathers and boys dance and there are refreshments
Not much is expected of the mothers aside for dressing your son as requested (usually while shirt/ shabbos pants) and you attending, listening and complimenting- some mothers bring prizes for their sons- I give one at home
... Mazel Tov! Lots of nachas!
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Ma3
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Mon, Apr 23 2018, 4:46 am
Don't know where you live, so I can't tell you for sure how it works by you. I live in BP, and my boys attend 2 different chedarim. Both were very similar. It's really not a seudah. It's more like a performance for the big milestone that they're starting to learn chumash.
Usually there's some pastries and drinks by the men and by us, there was a little by the ladies too, but not much. The boys then march in, sing their songs, while everyone watches, takes pics and sheps lots of nachas. Then they usually get a present from the menahel or Rav of the Kehilla. Then it's time to go home. I also got my son a present and grandparents can get a gift too if they like. It's like the feeling of a Pre 1A kid at her Pre school graduation. The boys feel super big and excited. And it really is a momentous occasion. After all, those boys will start learning the Holy Torah now!
Hope this helps you! And even though I'm not BT I didn't know what it's like the first time around. Very normal feeling!
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amother
Olive
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Mon, Apr 23 2018, 4:53 am
If you have this question for the Ima forum, I'm guessing that you have many other questions about how things go in your community. Can you ask a principal or community leader for someone who can guide you through this and similar "firsts"?
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sped
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Mon, Apr 23 2018, 6:00 am
You should also dress nicely, bring a camera and have lots of nachas that your son is beginning to learn Hashem's Torah. Make sure to give that over to him. I found DS's to be a beautiful, emotional event, if a bit long, and DS still feels the excitement a few years later. (Make sure he gets to a bathroom before it starts!)
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DVOM
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Mon, Apr 23 2018, 6:19 am
I remember how confused I was when my oldest son came home all excited about his chumash Seuda- call another mom in the school and get a run down of what to expect. In my sons' school, the fathers and grandfathers and rebbes and kids all dance outside (the moms and grandmas make a big circle around the dancing and clap), then procession inside, there is lots of singing, each boy gets to recite something, each kid is called up to get their chumash, and then a big brunch-like party afterward. All the mom's cook and contribute food to the party and all the families sit around munching and shmoozing and taking pictures while the kids gorge themselves on cake and candy. Its really lovely.
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amother
Mistyrose
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Mon, Apr 23 2018, 6:59 am
The idea is that we celebrate in excitement for the child starting to learn Torah. I wonder who started this minhag. It's so beautiful to watch. I remember having tears streaming down my face from all the emotion. Even though I knew what it was like cause of my brothers. It was a first for me as a mother and it was such a happy occasion.
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thunderstorm
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Mon, Apr 23 2018, 7:28 am
Depending on the school, some schools have the mothers contribute cake, confections, salads etc for the sweet table that they put out on both the women's and men's sides.
It's cute to watch a. Whole bunch of tiny boys singing and then saying a few psukim of Chumash . It's a milestone celebration. We took lots of pictures to have as memories.
When they all started singing a song yearning for Mashiach at my son's Seuda I got all emotional . I've had attended my four sons Chumash Seudos in different schools and each were very similar.
And OP, it's a Chumash Seuda and the Chasidish pronunciation is a " Chimish Seedah" but it's two words. It's the celebration for boys that are going to begin learning Chumash a/k/a Torah.
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mfb
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Mon, Apr 23 2018, 9:10 am
I'm not bt and I had never been at a chumash seudah before my sons. I also had to call pple to ask what to expect. (I don't have younger brothers and I didn't attend any of my nephews ones. )
My sons chumash seudahs were pretty much a performance/choir performed for the parents.
Make sure you have a well charged battery on your camera to catch the sweet moment.
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PinkFridge
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Mon, Apr 23 2018, 9:17 am
Can't answer but mazel tov on this wonderful milestone and may you celebrate many, many more, with simcha and menucha.
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InnerMe
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Mon, Apr 23 2018, 9:33 am
Hello,
Looks like you got good info.. Just want to tell you mazel tov and that it's a beautiful thing! For those I've been to, it's been a very emotional and meaningful experience. You watch those little innocent souls singing so sincerely, and it just melts your heart. Mazel tov and may you have much nachas from your little boy!
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amother
Seafoam
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Mon, Apr 23 2018, 9:36 am
Notsobusy wrote: | It sounds like you live in a great place, with a great community. Enjoy the chumash seuda and all the nachas!
Now I'm wondering, what's shultragen? Never heard of that, is it a chassidish thing? |
yes b´´H we love the palce we live-. it si tiny but very sweet people and eventhough chinuch/shidduchim etc is relatively secluded, towards 'other' groups like us litvish baaltshuvish families they are very welcoming and supportive.
shultragen is when the father brings his son 'officially' for the first time to davening (the boy is around 3 years old). it is a jeckishe minhag as far as I know not a chassidish minhag and we had a version without donating embroyded torah binders, instead with zuckies for the boys and sponsoring kiddush (kigl and tshulnt) for the men.
it is something dH's family used to do before the war in germany, so we decided to take up this minhag.
it is not like we pick and choose. there are some few things we know or remember from our grandparents (according to our ruv we should keep these minhagim), then we live in a chassidish dominated place so the minhagej ha makom here we also try to respect/observe (like skirtlength, kashrus standard etc) and some things we picked up during our bt- process (dH learned in yeshive, has his ruv etc...and I went to sem and had my mentors/rebbezins)...to us it all makes sense eventhough from outside it might seem like a big balagan
so for example we brok on pessach (which almost noone here does) but because dH davens in a chassidish shul his minche is long after shkiah (whereas before we moved here this was unheared ) and he dropped nussach ashkenas - unless we are traveling and daven in a nonchassidc shul.
we make shultragen but dc learns in yiddish and pronounces his davening way different than we do etc.
I agree it is a bit messed up but in a good way.
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