S/o parenting / hwk

thunderstorm

Thu, May 03 2018, 4:17 pm

Bnei Berak 10 wrote:

Sorry for asking but a 7 year old leaving at 8 and back at home 5 sounds a bit much. Is this because of long drive to school? What time classes start and when do they finish?

How about changing schools with a more suitable curriculum, is that an option? I'm asking since we all know that with age, students will have more homework, not less. Expectations will increase with age. If he has a hard time now, what will it be later on? Think of it very seriously because you probably want your son to enjoy school and succeed in his studies, right?

I don't know where you live but my so. Age 7 is out of the house from 8:00 until 5:30 . Most rebbeim don't give Lemudei Kodesh homework at all besides for Shabbos , when they review and learn everything they've learned all week.
The English teachers do give homework but have a "not more than 15 minute rule" even if my son is unable to complete it within that time frame. They allow the boys to finish it during class time.
My teenage boys are out of the house from six am until 10:00 at night so they have zero homework as well. They are graded based on class work, participation and tests. No homework at all. Not even studying for the tests.

questioner

Thu, May 03 2018, 4:23 pm

mha3484 wrote:

I LOVE my sons set up this year. The teacher gives a packet on Monday and you bring it back to her the next monday. I the MOTHER decide based on his needs when to do the homework. I wish this was the norm that all teachers do it this way. It really takes the pressure off.

My son has this as well. It was amazing for most of the year - he would do a little a night and pace himself or do it all on Monday and revel in the homework-free nights the rest of the week. But lately spring fever hit and hit hard. He pushes off the homework Sunday, Monday, Tuesday and then Wednesday night gets overwhelmed from the amount of homework. I'm trying to enforce a rule that if he complains on Wednesday, the next week he has to do a sheet a day but not always is that working.

Overall I'm pro - I think this approach teaches great time management skills and different approaches to splitting up work.

amother

Firebrick

Thu, May 03 2018, 5:36 pm

imasinger wrote:

Homework can teach a lot more than the subject matter. I have bright kids, ka"h, but they have very poor executive functioning skills.

Homework gives them practice at being responsible, planning, and doing so at the end of the day. I think those life skills are crucial.

I absolutely will help, but not do, a child's homework. Depending on how competent the teacher is, that help might be merely a reminder, examining resources together, or actually editing or correcting work. I could care less about the grade, what interests me is, did the child learn and benefit.

That being said, pointless make-work, arts n crafts projects for the artistically challenged, and assignments that are not age appropriate are bad news.

I have no problem sending a letter to a teacher requesting a meeting if there are inappropriate assignments.

I used to take the approach that I don't care about the grade, I care about skills and responsibility. But then I realized that, if I tell a teacher this is too much work, the teacher says ok but WILL hold it against dc. In a subtle way. I noticed that teachers were interacting and relating to my kids as though they are of very limited intelligence and ability.

Which is a real shame because it isn't true. But it did cause my kids, in turn, to lose interest in the subjects and zone out in class. Which did nothing to improve the teachers' assessments.

I also noticed that other parents don't want to speak to teachers, because they don't want the teacher to think that *their* kid is having trouble. Teachers would look me in the eye and say, Gee, no one ELSE in the class is having difficulty with the assignments!

Meanwhile, I happen to know for a fact that at least half the class, has their mothers doing the entire assignment.

amother

Ruby

Thu, May 03 2018, 5:57 pm

I want to weigh in from a teacher's point of view.

I don't give homework the kids can't do independently. If I see my class tried and failed to grasp a math skill, I cancel the homework and reteach it the next day.
There will always be students who can't work independently and need a lot of help on school work in the classroom and homework at home. However, in that case, yes, it is the parent's responsibility to help the child. We can't give your child everything in the classroom.
I try not to send home any projects or intensive writing work that the parents will complete instead, but some kids just don't finish in class.

I tell the parents of my students at the beginning of the year that the Chumash homework should take 10 minutes to review their pesukim and 2 minutes for the writing piece. I grade on completion only. The writing piece is just to make sure the binders make it out of the backpacks. It is easy to see which students are reviewing each night, and which ones are slacking off, based on how familiar they are with the previous material.

When I taught spelling/vocabulary, I told my students all work was due Friday, and suggested pages each night, but only collected it on Friday. Some kids learned how to work around their baseball games, some did the assigned pages each night.

Our students also need to just learn basic study skills, how to bring home work, do it, and return it. At some point in life they will need it, and if we don't teach it now, when will they learn.

Notsobusy

Fri, May 04 2018, 10:50 am

amother wrote:

I also noticed that other parents don't want to speak to teachers, because they don't want the teacher to think that *their* kid is having trouble. Teachers would look me in the eye and say, Gee, no one ELSE in the class is having difficulty with the assignments!

Some, or many, of those teachers are lying. I've had teachers tell me that and then I would discuss it with other mothers and they told me they also complained. I even once had the principal tell me nobody else complained about a certain teacher, and then I heard from other mothers that they all complained.

I also had one teacher tell me that because my dd is very smart, she won't have to complete all the homework. I tried explaining to her that if it's too much for my very intelligent dd, it's obviously much too much for the rest of the class, but she couldn't (or wouldn't) understand. She obviously got a lot of complaints, because when my next dd had the same teacher she had cut down considerably on the amount of homework she gave.

MiracleMama

Fri, May 04 2018, 1:36 pm

Homework annoys me. The school has my kids for 8 hours a day. That should be enough time spent on academics. When they come home they should relax, spend time outdoors, get exercise, etc.

That said, I do create an atmosphere for doing homework since I do not want to give my children the impression that school doesn't matter and teachers wishes don't matter and learning isn't something serious. I make a quiet space at a designated time and I make myself avaialble to help. If they still choose to not do/ complete their assignments, I don't push. Particularly this year, when I KNOW they are not completing all their homework and every time I ask their teachers how they're doing the answer is, "great." Hey, if they don't care, I REALLY don't care.