Answering door/phone

Seraph

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 3:46 am

Do you always answer the door if someone knocks, or answer the phone when it rings?

I don't answer the door if its someone I dont care for, or I'm untznius, sometimes. if its a friend and I'm untznius, I tell her, wait a sec, I'm untznius, I'll go quckly to put something on, but only if I really want to see this person.

but when the phone rings, I almost always answer, unless I'm busy. sometimes I'll answer and say "I can't really talk right now".

I know some people that'll answer their phone and door at all hours of the day and night, no matter what, that its k'ilu a chiyuv to be available to people 24/7.
and I know other people that hear the phone ring and say I dont feel like answering- if its important enough, they'll call back or leave a message.

what do you do. whats your policy?

neshamale

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 3:49 am

I totally don't feel obligated to answer the phone or door when I'm not in the mood - usually after the kids bedtime I just shut my cell, shut the ringer on the housephone and lock the door- I've had enough for the day. anyone (besides my mom, dh and kids) looking for my after 8 or 9 pm isn't very successful!

catonmylap

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 4:10 am

This is something dh and I don't quite agree on.

I usually answer the phone...I always worry it might be important. And it is almost always is a wrong number....we get calls for Merena and Vadim almost every single day still (often Russian speakers who don't speak Hebrew). We've had our number for 2 years already, so it's getting quite ridiculous.........dh gets really mad when I answer while we are eating.

We get really annoyed when it's a phone call after 10pm...and answer because we're worried that it has to be very important if it is that late (and so far, it never has been).

I admit I don't answer the door if I am not decent and it's not someone I know. If it's a female friend, she can see me without my hair covered or in pants, so I don't necessarily have to run and change either.

smiley:)

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 4:34 am

I answer the door and phone as I please. When ppl come to the door very late or knock persistently it gives me less inclination to answer bc I think both are rude.
At night when I go to sleep I turn the volume of the phone off.

Marion

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 6:09 am

I don't answer if it's mealtime, bathtime, if I'm nursing or changing a diaper. My cell has call display so I can return the call after. Even my employer knows and respects that.

amother

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 8:08 am

Nobody really comes to my door unannounced but UPS. I don't live in a place where neighbors just drop by.

I only answer the phone when it's convenient. I am usually busy. I have an answering machine and I have caller I.d., so I can return calls when it's convenient. My mother gets very angry with me about this always saying, "what if I had an emergency and couldn't reach you?" I tell her that's what 911 is for. Wink

Ruchel

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 8:11 am

No phone answer during the meals, but yes for the door.
No answer at all if I'm busy doing something like bathing, but up to now no one called or knocked just at that time.
Untznius problem would only be in summer when it's too hot for keeping the long sleeves and skirts at home, I suppose I would rush to change and answer if the person is still ringing...
At night I'm not sure we would hear the phone (we're on 3rd floor), and the door, well it someone knocns really late he probably needs help?? B'h I don't think it ever happened...

Pickle Lady

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 8:15 am

I check the called ID where id comes to the phone and decide to answer it from there. I won't run to the phone if I am busy ie. bathing the kids or resting.

The door, if the kids are home I usually send them to the door to ask who it is (without opening it) and decide from there.

amother

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 8:26 am

I feel kind of an obligation to answer the phone because we are shluchim in a remote place, and what if people need us?
It has happened that people have called very late - and it WAS for an emergency, but sometimes, it's people calling just to find out some info in order to make their travel plans, and could not be bothered to check the time difference (“oh, you mean it’s one o'clock by you? I'm sorry!” Confused

)
(BTW, we have a website with all the info – but I guess not everyone makes internet searches)

shopaholic

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 9:38 am

Phone - BH for caller ID. I get too many telemarketers or people calling for survey "WE're not selling anything..."

Door - I always answer. We have an intercom so I can answer & if I don't know who it is, I don't buzz.

chillax

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 10:31 am

I always answer the door and phone. Unless I'm in the shower or something and obviously can't get to it, but otherwise I answer it. and timely.
I hate it when people don't, like I'll go to people's houses and the phone will ring and they don't even look for it to answer it. (or they let it ring on end with no rush) Drives me nuts, and when I call myself and there's no answer, I KNOW that someone if for sure therebut just not answering for no reason.

GAMZu

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 11:34 am

I'm on the 2nd floor with no intercom and my downstairs neighbor gets 95% of the visitors-- who ring my bell, too!
So I only answer the door if:
I'm expecting someone,
I know there will be a package coming soon,
or if the person rings again in a few seconds.

Phone, I usually take, unless it's inconvenient.
And actually, chillax, I don't take the phone when I have visitors unless I know it's important. When I have people over, I feel it's disrespectful to take the phone.

momluv

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 11:47 am

there are times when I ignore the ringing phone, for example when bathing my son, feeding him, or just relaxing. the door I'll ignore when I hear every bell in the building resonate at once. then I know it's tzeddaka and don't answer if my dh isn't home.

gryp

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 11:51 am

The phone I'll usually answer because the ringing wake up my kids who go to sleep pretty early. (No volume on the ringer, I need to get a new one.)

The door I answer only if I'm dressed, the house is tidied, I know who it is and I'm expecting them, UPS or store delivery. If I'm not expecting someone I probably won't open the door for them, not even if it's family. They've learned by now that they have to call and tell me they're headed over or they'll just end up ringing or knocking until they give up. Smile

NotInNJMommy

Thu, Dec 06 2007, 11:56 am

I don't answer the door when I'm napping or untznius or I know it's J Witnesses....

I rarely answer the phone. I see caller ID and unless it's dh, I wait for them to leave a message. Then I'll pick up in the middle of their message or I'll call them back. If I answered every call, or even most calls, I'd never get anything done and my toddler and I would go crazy with each other.

mimivan

Fri, Dec 07 2007, 5:39 am

If it is a man, I reserve the right not to answer the door no matter who it is.
Period. Even if I think they know I am home. It is not safe and I don't feel very modest doing so...(if it is someone we are expecting, obviously different story)

Once an Arab who wanted to trim our hedge was banging on my door like crazy one morning. He kept saying "I know you are there" and went out in front of our garden and screamed at me through the window. Then he came back and banged on the door gain like he was going to break it down. Exploding anger

If he had from the beginning knocked like a civilized person, I would have spoken him through the keyhole.
(it is our punishment for having given him work before..)

We didn't owe him money. My husband did not make an arrangement with him. He just wanted to trim the hedge. I felt like asking him how he would feel if some man was harassing his wife in East Jerusalem the way he was bothering me.

I felt so disgusted that I was sure I don't want to open the door to a man unless it is an emergency.

chocolate moose

Fri, Dec 07 2007, 10:34 am

mimivan wrote:

If it is a man, I reserve the right not to answer the door no matter who it is.

We talked about that once. I wanted to know what to say if a man was at the door.

You obv. can't see, I'm not dressed. You have to say, I can't open the door right now.