Cheder on Sunday | Imamother

Log in / Sign Up

List of Forums + New Post Recipe Box Usergroups Following My Posts Bookmarks

Private Messages Advanced Search Rules New User Guide FAQ Advertise Contact Us

Forum -> Parenting our children -> Preschoolers

Cheder on Sunday

View latest: 24h 48h 72h

Mommy912

Tue, Aug 16 2005, 5:43 pm

My son will be going to school on Sunday for the first time this year. He has an older sister who will be home and younger siblings. I would like to make Sundays as stress-free as possible for him, I don't want him to resent going to Yeshiva. I don't want a battle each week, but I also don't want him to feel like he is doing something extra, I want it to be a regular part of his routine. Should I give him a special snack on Sundays? I would prefer not to use food as an incentive, but I will do so if I can't think of anything better.

Motek

Tue, Aug 16 2005, 5:48 pm

you might want to talk to him about your pride in having a "yeshiva bachur" in the family, not necessarily connecting it to school on Sunday, so that he takes pride in going to yeshiva

it sure would help if he had a great rebbi!

lucky

Tue, Aug 16 2005, 9:09 pm

s//t my sons were upset that the girls got to stay home on sundays. in 7th grade the girls start going on Sundays too.

1stimer

Thu, Aug 18 2005, 1:57 pm

About giving food as a prize, I just heard a SHOCKING THING: Rav Sheinberg said that giving food as a prize, it will cause the kids to later have ta'avos with girls. basically it is b/c ta'va for food, girls has the same root. He said it is better not to give a 'gashmius' prize. But to give a 'ruchnius' prize, I.e. a note, a book, a tape, and the best is to give something the whole family can enjoy, so he is the 'hero'

That's not to say *never* give food prize, but it shouldn't be *the* prize.

Motek

Thu, Aug 18 2005, 4:31 pm

I'd love to hear an exact quote and I wonder how it fits with the Rambam who says to give children food incentives!

1stimer

Sat, Aug 20 2005, 2:11 pm

What's the source for the rambam motek?

Motek

Sun, Aug 21 2005, 1:27 pm

Rambam's pirush ha'Mishnayos, Sanhedrin, beginning perek Chelek

1stimer

Sun, Aug 28 2005, 1:27 pm

My dh found out about this Rambam. It is a very difficult rambam, as the rambam says 2 conflicting things. He says about giving incentives and he also says a few lines later it is a disgusting thing. So my husband heard from Rabbi Mandel that he asked a big talmid chochom about this. He was told that indeed the Rambam said it was disgusting, however that is the society we live in. So ideally we shouldn't be giving children prizes for things that are expected of them.

Interestingly a study was done in america. 1 class was asked to help weaker students, and a 2 was told they would be given a dollar for helping weaker students. Later both classes were asked to help weaker students (without a prize) and the 2nd class wouldnt' do it without a prize.

3Qts

Mon, Sep 05 2005, 2:06 am

Interesting..My sons rebbe gives him 1/2 jelly bean every day if they are good!! (Let me tell you..I am sure it tastes alot better then any nosh I give him!!

sarahd

Mon, Sep 05 2005, 3:38 am

1stimer wrote:

My husband tells me that in the yeshivos of a certain Chassidus, the bachurim are served fantastic food. The Rebbe decreed this because he says that bachurim have suchstrong taavos. If they have great food, their taavos will be expended on enjoying the food and they will be saved from other, worse temptations.

1stimer

Mon, Sep 05 2005, 12:34 pm

That's interesting. would you mind saying which chassidus it is?

I have heard that when Rabbi Orloweck (world renowned mashgiach) deals with a boy who has strong taavos in the girl etc. department, he tells them to start by controlling their taavos for food, that they should leave over food on their plates when they eat.

Aside from that, it seems that chassidim have different hashkafas when it comes to discipline anyway.

Mommy912

Wed, Sep 07 2005, 12:10 am

momofthree wrote:

Interesting..My sons rebbe gives him 1/2 jelly bean every day if they are good!! (Let me tell you..I am sure it tastes alot better then any nosh I give him!!

I am just imagining the rebbe's wife sitting there each night cutting this big pile of jellybeans into halves...

Page 1 of 1