For those of us yeshivish who let our kids watch YouTube

TranquilityAndPeace

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 10:19 am

I have 3 kids who are older teens/20’s, then a ten year space and a 7 year old DD.

Obviously when the big kids were little, I didn’t have an iPhone or iPad. I had several Uncle Moishy and other Jewish DVD’s they watched on my computer occasionally.

Fast forward to my 7 year old DD. She is being raised in another world.

She likes Barney, Peppa Pig, Daniel Tiger, etc. Obviously these are meant for kids younger than her, but I’m okay with these shows.

I have very strict screen time rules, so that’s not my topic now.

What will happen in a year or two when she wants to watch Disney movies? And beyond?

If I have to label myself, we’re middle of the road yeshivish in Baltimore.

Most Disney tv shows have lots of chutzpah at parents and boy/girlfriend relationships happening, that I would want to somewhat shelter my daughter from.

I realize that it’s just a matter of time until she realizes that Barney and Peppa Pig are boring. Some of her classmates have TVs and watch many shows, and some of her classmates moms’ don’t even have smartphones... the wonderful diversity of BY of Baltimore.

My question is:

If you allowed your child to watch cartoon shows on TV as a preschooler and young grade schooler, yet you are more yeshivishly inclined to shelter kids from today’s tween and teen tv shows, then how did you deal with your child getting older?

Did you suddenly ban YouTube?

Suddenly only allow Jewish movies? (I tried Toveedo and she tolerated it and begged for Peppa Pig)

Curious how this plays out, and what I should expect when my 7 year old turns 8, 9, 10, etc....

Thank you!

amother

Lime

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 10:26 am

A few options.

1. Banning completely

2. Still only allowing kiddie shows

3. Buying lots of Jewish videos

4. Finding documentaries that are age appropriate. My daughter who is 4 loves watching "the most dangerous ways to school" my son who is older enjoys watching structures burning

LovesHashem

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 10:28 am

amother [ Lime ] wrote:

Documentaries are great. There's also PBS Kids type shows, the Magic School Bus, etc that are pretty clean.

amother

Tangerine

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 10:37 am

It truly is a slippery slope. I let my kids watch way too much and way more than my older son as well. There's really nothing great out there. I wish I had more advice just sympathizing that it is really hard especially with Corona and being home so much more. My kids watched before but way less than they do now

malki2

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 10:42 am

Slippery slope. But we try to draw the line at allowing only non-fictional documentaries like How It’s Made and Modern Marvels and animal shows, all of which can keep them busy for years and which are fascinating and educational. On vacations we allow movies but only those that are ~100% kosher. So as they get older they usually lose interest in these and stick with the documentaries.

Success10

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 10:45 am

I wouldn't let any Disney movies. We were raised with them as being wholesome, so it's very hard to take a step back and realize those are not the values we want to give our kids. There is actually tons of Frum entertainment if you look. It costs money, but some are subscription based, and some are free. For the time being Oorah Shmorg is free and it's amazing, high quality kosher content.

Check out Corona Kosher: http://coronakosher.com/ Tons of ideas of kosher content.

Last edited by Success10 on Fri, Jul 17 2020, 10:48 am; edited 1 time in total

amother

Emerald

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 10:52 am

Its not so difficult. I openly tell my children that when it comes to anything, whether it's a trip we go on, or books we read, or videos we watch, it needs to be something that wont damage our neshama. Both childrens' neshamas and parents neshamas need to be protected.
I screen my childrens library books, have always found plenty of good secular reading material for them.
Same with movies and shows. I use kidsinmind.com (its waaaaay better than common sense media). I screen the movies beforehand (they are so detailed I laugh) and you can also filter the search options by how clean you want the movie.
As kids grow up and become preteens and teens ive always been able to find movies and shows that are clean enough. No, they arent the majority but theyre not a needle in a haystack either.
Its worked for us ..

ETA dont lump disney into one category. For example, the aristocats is a perfectly clean Disney movie...you need to just look into them

malki2

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 10:53 am

Success10 wrote:

This. I had vague fond memories of seeing Fantasia as a child (my mother took me to the movie theater to watch an anniversary showing, probably because she had fond memories herself). So I thought to show it to my kids. So I previewed it. Devils, Hell, Evolution, Greco-Roman mythology, Evil Spirits were only some of its benign themes.

Catcher

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 10:55 am

Since this lockdown began I've basically lost control of screen time. Once this whole nightmare is over I'm hoping to "get rid" of tv completely (we watch on a laptop so can't throw it out but you know what I mean). I'm gearing up for an almighty battle but I think its worth it. If I could go back in time I would never have exposed my kids to tv in the 1st place. Huge mistake.

giselle

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 10:56 am

I’m not yeshivish so I’m not going to comment specifically on which movies or what to do, but I did want to point out that I don’t let my kids use YouTube when they are young. It’s so easy to accidentally get to an inappropriate video. Sometimes it just automatically comes up next. When they’re a little older they can watch on You Tube if we’re in the room with them. I can’t say I’m always as on top of it as I’d like to be (honestly the past few months have been so crazy in this and many regards, but I plan to buckle down once more after the summer), but you should be aware of how dangerous YouTube can be.

Last edited by giselle on Fri, Jul 17 2020, 11:10 am; edited 1 time in total

smss

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 10:58 am

amother [ Emerald ] wrote:

Don't say "damage." Neshamos are pure and untouchable. We can't damage or dirty them. We *can* become more or less in touch with them, tuned into them, connected to them.

amother

Maroon

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 11:00 am

We said no to Disney. There are some cartoon shows that are more educational. You need to be selective. And often you need to screen within specific shows. Many of us were allowing Arthur, and then there was a specific episode that was a real problem.

A lot ends up being related to what their friends are watching. Dd still complains that I wouldn't let her watch Frozen when everyone else she knew saw it. When she got a bit older, we talked about the plot, and the words to "Let it Go", and I asked her what she thought about that idea.

Filling the void is important, and so is confidence. A girl who can confidently say, "Nah, I don't watch that. Check out the Chanale video with her kids!" can go a long way, and sometimes even start trends. Make sure that some of what they can watch has humor- if it's too earnest, they'll still be craving something else.

amother

Lawngreen

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 11:07 am

My kids loved all these shows, and I liked some more than others. Daniel Tiger is amazing at social- emotional awareness. But I decided to stop now when they are 3 and 4 and got a toveedo subscription. They'll sometimes beg to see Daniel Tiger or Curious George, but like you said. What's gonna happen when they get bored of these.

Toveedo has a lot less content per age since they are trying to cater to the entire jewish family. But with the screentime limits I enforce it's enough for now.

malki2

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 11:07 am

avrahamama wrote:

I never thought of documentaries!

So I go vintage and do Dennis the Menace, I love Lucy etc. And daven that any of the hobbies I encourage stick... So that between school davening learning and hobbies there's no time to watch

There are so so so many documentaries. Usually the boys are more interested than the girls because most of them are about machines and wars and weapons and animals. But some girls go for that stuff as well. And if not, there are always those Jewish musicals that the girls can watch but not the boys.

FranticFrummie

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 11:22 am

MY LITTLE PONY!

This is my favorite show ever, and I loved watching it with DD. The ponies learn good middos and cooperation. The main writers are Jewish. There is no violence or overt meanness (I think one pony gets teased or excluded here or there, but it's always resolved by the end of the show.)

It's smartly written, so it's fun for adults too. People of any age can enjoy it. Boys like it too, because there are male pony characters. Any romance is so vaguely hinted at that it's nearly invisible.

CBCKids (Canadian version of PBS) is fantastic. Great quality programming, nothing to give you even the slightest pause. (If you live in the northern US you can usually pick it up on cable TV.) You might be able to get it online.

The biggest danger of YouTube isn't what you watch, it's what comes up on the sidebar. You're always one or two clicks away from some serious weirdness. Make sure that your kids only watch what you want them to, and that they don't go "exploring" the suggested content.

amother

Mauve

Fri, Jul 17 2020, 11:32 am

My kids watch 'Rabbi L'Yeledim" (a cute 5-10 min animated clip based on the teachings of Chabad for kids) every week after havdalah. But never anything else. I can't stand seeing kids glued to smartphones and laptops. I don't have a smartphone and try to limit my own screentime. Parents need to realize we can't have double standards either.