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Overnight guests

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Akeres Habayis

Tue, Feb 26 2008, 5:23 am

would u have a bochur and a divorced single woman who is over 40 stay in your home?
one is a 25yr old bochur who really wants to come for a shabbos,and isnt from here and the other is a dear friend of mine who really needs a place for shabbos,she is always alone for shabbos,and just went thru something terrible and called and asked if she could come.I told her about the bochur and she said she is too old for him anyway so it shouldnt be a problem for her.
I never have mixed guests stay over but not sure what to do,I have two floors the bochur could stay downstairs and her upstairs.
the bochur I could put off again(3shabbosim,I had to cancel for various reasons,but now someone wants me to check him out for a shidduch)and to mention my dh is looking forward to this bochur coming and so am I.
what do u think??

miracle

Tue, Feb 26 2008, 5:52 am

Did u ask the Bachur if he minds? I think if you have space for both and you are all ok with it. Why not? you will be helping out 2 people that need where to be for shabat

lst

Tue, Feb 26 2008, 5:53 am

I agree, I think its totally fine.
you can ask the boy if he minds

Akeres Habayis

Tue, Feb 26 2008, 6:09 am

I'll ask my dh to ask him,he also doesn't speak english so well and she doesnt' speak hebrew.

louche

Tue, Feb 26 2008, 8:07 am

Oh, you mean at the same time? Hmmm....I think I wouldn't. If I had to host them on the same Shabbos, I'd try to have one sleep at neighbors and have the other sleep in our house. I see no problem having them both over for meals, but sleeping doesn't feel right, even if the woman does feel she's "too old" for the bocher.

amother

Tue, Feb 26 2008, 8:35 am

We have never been as makpid on not having girls and bochurim at the same time-- but we've always made sure we knew exactly who our guests were, and we took time to ensure tznius, etc. For example, we've had the kinds of girls and bochurim who would all but ignore each other at the Shabbos table-- and DH & I take care to always be around and especially not leave the kitchen / dining room area until the girls go upstairs and the bochurim downstairs.

As for your predicament, if they each know what to expect, I don't see it as a problem, and kal v'chomer if they don't speak the same language!!

happyone

Tue, Feb 26 2008, 8:38 am

one's a bachur and one is a 40 year old divorcee... don't see why that would be a problem. unless, you plan on putting them in the same bedroom Twisted Evil

gamekeeper

Tue, Feb 26 2008, 12:25 pm

ask your local rabbi! I dont think that age makes a difference... find out and let us know!

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