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Forum
-> Fashion and Beauty
cookiewriter
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:36 pm
I’m a bklyn mom. I wear nice highlighted wigs makeup etc. I don’t own a lace top. Of course I really want one. But there’s something about it that just doesn’t sit right with me, and that is, I CANNOT TELL A LACE TOP WIG FROM ACTUAL HAIR. I’m married 17 years and can spot a wig a mile away. Not anymore. I cannot tell if people are single or married.
There has to be something halachically not ok with that? I know point of wig is to cover your hair. Let’s assume it’s the lace top that doesn’t show through to your actual scalp like some do. Like let’s say it’s lined. Is it the same as any old regular wig? And I’m kidding myself? My regular wigs are just as bad/ or just as kosher as a lined lace top wig?
I’m not gonna give up wigs and start wearing scarves (maybe one day). If this is us ladies big mitZva shouldn’t we know tjr actual halachos
Is there Halacha here
Or just spirit of the law
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LovesHashem
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:37 pm
My Rav says they are assur.
But you need to ask your own Rav. Even if he said it was muttar it wouldn't sit well with me either.
But other people do allow it.
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amother
Rose
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:39 pm
Many Rabbanim say they are assur. But who asks a Rav before they buy a wig?
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ShishKabob
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:40 pm
amother [ Rose ] wrote: | Many Rabbanim say they are assur. But who asks a Rav before they buy a wig? | (the same that ask about a heter for bc) lol! I couldn't control myself!
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amother
Emerald
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:40 pm
LovesHashem wrote: | My Rav says they are assur.
But you need to ask your own Rav. Even if he said it was muttar it wouldn't sit well with me either.
But other people do allow it. |
Totally out of curiosity because I do plan on asking myself. Does your Rav allow lace fronts?
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amother
Fuchsia
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:41 pm
OP, agree 100%. dont own one
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amother
Magenta
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:41 pm
Yes, mine allows them. There are many rabbonim who do.
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sky
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:41 pm
amother [ Emerald ] wrote: | Totally out of curiosity because I do plan on asking myself. Does your Rav allow lace fronts? |
Mine does not
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amother
Wine
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:41 pm
Most 'outsider' men don't have the sensitivity to identify a good quality non-lace wig. So that isn't a great yard-stick to measure by.
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PeanutMama
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:44 pm
My Rav allows human hair shaitels with a hechser but definitely not these lace front lace tops wigs.
It just doesn’t sit right with me. And my husband definitely would NOT want me to wear those wigs.
And I’m the same age group! (20s-30s)
Was honestly shocked once when a friend told me of a woman who was wearing this wig had children coming up to her calling her “mommy” and she herself was also shocked!
Last edited by PeanutMama on Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:48 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother
Papaya
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:45 pm
I asked my rav and he said he won't pasken about it. It sounds like a complicated issue.
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amother
Emerald
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:48 pm
Ok thanks. I know mine allows lace fronts. I'm wondering if there are any Rabbanim who allow lace fronts but not lace tops.
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amother
Mauve
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:50 pm
ShishKabob wrote: | (the same that ask about a heter for bc) lol! I couldn't control myself! |
Uncalled for comment.
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amother
Saddlebrown
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:53 pm
amother [ Wine ] wrote: | Most 'outsider' men don't have the sensitivity to identify a good quality non-lace wig. So that isn't a great yard-stick to measure by. |
My female coworker can’t identify my $200 wig (not lace/not anything-it is $200). The ones who wear weaves can, but the others, not a chance.
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amother
Khaki
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:54 pm
amother [ Wine ] wrote: | Most 'outsider' men don't have the sensitivity to identify a good quality non-lace wig. So that isn't a great yard-stick to measure by. |
Agreed. Even many non-Jewish women I have worked with had no idea the Jewish women were wearing wigs.
However, I am very much of the opinion that covered is covered. I'm definitely not a rav - I admit that freely. And I truly value tznius too.
But the purpose of a wig is to cover hair. If it's not your hair, you're good. And if your wig looks like it's growing out of your head, how lucky are you.
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clowny
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:56 pm
amother [ Khaki ] wrote: | Agreed. Even many non-Jewish women I have worked with had no idea the Jewish women were wearing wigs.
However, I am very much of the opinion that covered is covered. I'm definitely not a rav - I admit that freely. And I truly value tznius too.
But the purpose of a wig is to cover hair. If it's not your hair, you're good. And if your wig looks like it's growing out of your head, how lucky are you. |
Not exactly so because some hold that it is assur for a married women to look like she’s wearing her own hair. In other words, a married women should look like she’s married.
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caffeine99
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 1:56 pm
I think it depends on whether or not the view is why you cover your hair. Many Rabbanim who support Shaitle over tichel will say that you are covering your hair for you, which is why you can have the hair.
Others will say its a public thing so others know and therefore they are less for shaitles or realistic looking ones.
Personally, I've been very hesitant to buy a lace front, not sure how different the top makes it, but didn't want people to think I took my hair out in the front etc. Personally I know I cover my hair, and the wig I'd buy would look nothing like my hair even if I tried... again it depends.
Just my opinion tho...
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amother
Rose
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 2:01 pm
amother [ Khaki ] wrote: | Agreed. Even many non-Jewish women I have worked with had no idea the Jewish women were wearing wigs.
However, I am very much of the opinion that covered is covered. I'm definitely not a rav - I admit that freely. And I truly value tznius too.
But the purpose of a wig is to cover hair. If it's not your hair, you're good. And if your wig looks like it's growing out of your head, how lucky are you. |
We hold that the purpose of a wig is to cover our hair & that we should look like an eishes ish-married women.
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amother
Saddlebrown
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Mon, Jan 11 2021, 2:09 pm
amother [ Rose ] wrote: | The purpose of a wig is to cover our hair & that we should look like an eishes ish-married women. |
The problem with stating why is you can poke holes in an argument.
If a non-frum person has no idea that it is a wig or that married people wear wigs, then do we still look like married women or do we look like cancer patients c”vs?
Or maybe we just look like we are trying to be stylish or have bad hair? People wear wedding rings as a sign of marriage. I can look at someone’s hand and know their marital status.
We cover because it is the Halacha to cover. Because we believe Hashem said so. Do you not eat pork to prevent Trichinosis? We know know that if it is cooked well and refrigerated properly you don’t get sick. Should we revisit eating it?
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