I'm fed up of being so poor

Log in / Sign Up

List of Forums + New Post Recipe Box Usergroups Following My Posts Bookmarks

Private Messages Advanced Search Rules New User Guide FAQ Advertise Contact Us

Forum -> Household Management -> Finances

View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 3:28 pm

Just a rant..

I'm so fed up of being so poor and always being in the red. We're just not making it. DH is in kollel and I work for home. Just came back from maternity leave, and we aren't sure if we are getting the full 3 months we were hoping for. Now I feel so guilty, I should have gone back to work earlier. Confused

But I hate how mismanaged the finances are. I leave it up to DH but I would probably do a better job. We are so often in crisis mode, waiting for money to come in. We sometimes have to ask my in laws for help, and I HATE THAT!! I wish we were self sufficient!!! I hate other people knowing our state of finances, then I feel judged for any purchase I make. I find it so difficult to live like this. Crying

Example: I recently gave up nursing after 11 weeks of trying and being in pain. Now my baby is on formula, and any time she doesn't finish a bottle, I'm like such a waste of money. Formula is sooo expensive!
I wish I could buy some new trendy clothing for the season but we can't afford it! I wish I wouldn't have to think 7 times before making a purchase. I wish I could buy DH a decent birthday present. I wish we could afford to go away for a few days. I WISH WE WEREN'T POOR!

Sorry to complain but have no one IRL to whine to!

amother

Sapphire

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 3:36 pm

Do you live in the US? If so you may be able to get WIC for the formula......

lovingmommy3417

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 3:37 pm

I know this was just a rant and may not be looking for input, but could your husband learn part time and start working part time?

amother

Aubergine

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 3:49 pm

Why isn't your husband working? How can you wish to be self sufficient when your husband doesn't work? It usually doesn't go together.
It's nice to be able to learn in kollel, but you need to use your sechel and know when it's time to stop.

amother

Red

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 4:02 pm

Um, you should not be paying for formula. Get on WIC, food stamps and Medicaid ASAP, unless DH wants to take a PT job.

amother

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 4:12 pm

Thank you for your replies. This is jusst a temporary situation, we are waiting for the maternity benefits to come in. We are in Israel so food stamps not an option.

hodeez

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 4:26 pm

I'm sorry but it looks like the answer is increased income, and that means a change in your kollel lifestyle.

I wish my husband had never left kollel, but now that he has I see that our current lifestyle bh would have been impossible on his few hundred dollars a month stipend. ( I would trade the comfort for his learning in a heartbeat). But if your current situation is causing you such tzaar you both need to sit down and reconsider your plans.

Crookshanks

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 4:32 pm

I'm so sorry! It's so hard to be in that place where you need but you can't have.
Hug

amother

Cobalt

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 4:34 pm

I can relate, sort of, except in my situation dh is actually bringing in more than I am even from kollel - I work, but only part time since I'm in school, and bec I'm not finished school my salary is somewhat pathetic. And it's so hard that I need to think twice before spending anything, and that my bank account has almost nothing in it, but I feel guilty complaining because I'm only married a couple of years and my parents are still paying most of our rent and help out in lots of other ways.
Not being completely self-sufficient doesn't bother me that much - I'm hopeful that it'll change in a few years when I'm finished with school and have a decent job - but it's definitely hard in the meantime. And yes, we have WIC and Medicaid, but there's still so much more besides for that.
I just want to say, I get you OP, and I hope things look up for you (and for everyone lol) very soon!!!

naturalmom5

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 5:04 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Why dont you get formula through WIC

amother

Sienna

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 5:09 pm

Op, this is life. Either work more, or your husband has to work.
I know people post here all the time that they want to have kids every year, not work because they’re tired and their husband not work so that’s an option too. It’s your choice to make

naturalmom5

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 5:12 pm

I read the other posts now

If you are American citizens maybe its time to come back here

He can learn shtark here and still manage more than you are now..

Cookin4days

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 5:13 pm

Hugs hugs hugs !

I hear you and I feel you, hopefully your situation changes for the best

amother

Slateblue

Tue, Apr 27 2021, 5:15 pm

Where do you live? Theres a formula gemach in ramat eshkol

Page 1 of 1