Suspenders...save me!!!!

amother

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 12:48 am

I love my husband, I dont want to comment, but he gained a lot of weight recently, and put on suspenders cuz nothing else was holding up his pants...
oh, I beg you people, find me an alternative I can somehow gently suggest that will make him take them off.... suspenders are mortifying...and he is all of 29....

zaq

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 11:55 am

Would you appreciate your dh telling you not to wear low-heel shoes or earmuffs or mittens, because he thinks they look nerdy? Given your post, you would probably never be caught dead in these, but use your imagination.

You don't own your dh looks. If he suffers from Dunlap's disease--his gut "done lap" over his waistband--a belt may not hold up his pants because, unlike a woman's, a man's hips aren't wider than his waist and won't keep his pants from sliding south. Also unlike a woman, a man looks beyond ridiculous if he hikes his waistband up above his navel. So unless you want your dh to spend all his time yanking on his trousers to keep himself from inadvertent indecent exposure, you'd best resign yourself to his wearing suspenders. Go shopping and find a few pairs that you can live with.

Suspenders are a fashion accessory and you can find some stylish ones.

The only alternative is to wear jumpsuits or robes.

moonstone

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 12:16 pm

zaq wrote:

I've never heard of Dunlap's disease 😂😂😂 Made me giggle!

amother

Turquoise

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 12:40 pm

My husband is bigger and wears suspenders. For years. I totally understand your feelings. I’ve made peace with it a long time ago. And he makes peace with the things that embarrass him about me.

You’re worried that people who see you together will think you think it’s cute. I think it’s important to dissociate yourself from your husband just a little bit. Just look at yourself in the mirror, shrug your shoulders to yourself and say “that’s my husband! He’s an individual who makes his own choices, and I don’t have to love them.” Turn it into a mantra every time it gets you nervous. And if anyone asks (always MY biggest worry), that’s what you tell them.

Unless you can’t get past it, and you decide this is one of those battles you want to pick… up to you Smile

we all have ours Smile

Notsobusy

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 12:47 pm

Ladies, I think some of you are being a little harsh with op. She said she wants to gently suggest an alternative. She's not planning on telling him that he's not allowed to wear what he wants.

We all have things that bother us and I think it's ok to mention it nicely or gently suggest that you would prefer something else.

amother

Cyclamen

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 12:58 pm

amother [ Yolk ] wrote:

Oy, imagine what the British amothers must think of this thread! Hiding

In the UK they refer only to underwear which can lead to some interesting conversation. What Americans refer to as pants are called trousers here.

amother

Purple

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 1:22 pm

amother [ Yolk ] wrote:

Oy, imagine what the British amothers must think of this thread! Hiding

Suggesting his pants might fall down takes on a whole new meaning when British english is applied!

amother

Bronze

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 1:25 pm

SafeAtLast wrote:

How about wearing them under his shirt, with a tucked out shirt?

How is the messy disheveled look of an untucked shirt better than suspenders?

amother

Dill

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 1:31 pm

My husband weighs about 300 lb. and he wears belts and never suspenders. His pants have never fallen down. He likes this one from Amazon, in the adjustable from 48" to 64" waist size: https://www.amazon.com/gp/prod.....d40e3

cbsp

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 1:40 pm

DH wears a belt AND suspenders. Calls it his insurance policy. LOL

Never really thought of it from a fashion perspective but it does make it easier to spot him in a crowd.

amother

Molasses

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 3:50 pm

OP, do you find your husband attractive generally? Mine, I think he's hot no matter what he wears. But... when he puts on suspenders... I'm much happier. He just pulls the look off. Maybe work on seeing this as a fashion statement (which for some men, it really is) and get playful with them. Changing your treatment/ view of the offending suspenders might help you cope better.

PinkFridge

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 4:16 pm

OP, I feel your pain. It's not something you expected for a while, if at all. My "gut reaction" (so sorry I couldn't resist) is that anything, anything is better than oh, I just read Zak's post, that Dunlap thing, with the trousers* waist many sizes smaller than he should be reading.
I want to send you hugs, and perspective, and mutual love and respect in your marriage till 120. You're not a bad person for this bothering you. It's obviously not the biggest thing in the world but it is something to make peace with, or use chochmas nashim with. Hatzlacha!

*That's in honor of the Brits among us.

amother

Indigo

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 4:20 pm

When I married DH he preferred suspenders to a belt. I wasn't used to the look and didn't love it, but I didn't think it was right for me to insist he switch to a belt. Life went on and eventually the suspender buttons would get loose and fall off and I, who can barely sew to begin with, just never got around to replacing the buttons. DH couldn't be bothered to sew them on himself so eventually he just switched to a belt on his own since it was the only way to hold his pants up.

hodeez

Wed, Jun 23 2021, 4:25 pm

cbsp wrote:

DH wears a belt AND suspenders. Calls it his insurance policy. LOL

Never really thought of it from a fashion perspective but it does make it easier to spot him in a crowd.

That's adorable 😄