How do you teach your HFA child about stranger danger

amother

Mon, Jun 26 2023, 12:49 pm

My 5 Yr old HFA son is very trusting of adults. He can just approach any stranger in the playground and start chatting to them. While they find it very cute, I am worried about his safety. I tried explaining that you mustn't speak to strangers etc... But he doesn't really understand. I also bought the book "let's stay safe" but he didn't really absorb what it says.
Also, how do I teach about personal space and touching etc...

amother

Bottlebrush

Mon, Jun 26 2023, 12:58 pm

It’s a struggle. It’s ok if he talks to strangers. He just can’t walk off with them.
Mainly at this age it involves having a constant eye on him.
Needs to be watched by an adult 100% of the time.
Don’t have his full name visible on his clothes or backpack etc but do have your phone number on him somewhere.

amother

Mon, Jun 26 2023, 1:03 pm

amother Bottlebrush wrote:

The thing is I can definitely see him walking off with a stranger. He wouldn't think twice

LovesHashem

Mon, Jun 26 2023, 1:03 pm

Why don't you bring this up to his therapist or whatever proffersional you are using?

He probably doesn't fully understand what coukd go wrong so maybe try to focus on that a little more, it's hard to do something without understand why.

Personal space and touching would be taught in a social skills group.

amother

Bottlebrush

Mon, Jun 26 2023, 1:11 pm

amother OP wrote:

The thing is I can definitely see him walking off with a stranger. He wouldn't think twice

Been there done that. He’s 5; he should be kept in your view or another responsible adult at all times.

amother

Burntblack

Tue, Jun 27 2023, 1:00 pm

amother Bottlebrush wrote:

Been there done that. He’s 5; he should be kept in your view or another responsible adult at all times.

Mine is 8.5, finishing 2nd grade, has a schoolbus, and can't be kept in view of me or DH at all times.

Please answer the question at hand instead of nitpicking the child's age and OP's parenting.
My HFASD 8.5yo still has stranger danger issues.

amother

Tue, Jun 27 2023, 7:07 pm

amother Burntblack wrote:

Thanks
True, I can't always be near him. What about school etc? I am worried about inappropriate touch. He is such an easy target because he trusts every adult.

amother

Latte

Tue, Jun 27 2023, 7:14 pm

Most children who are molested are molested by a familiar adult, not a stranger! Teaching him to beware of strangers is secondary to teaching him to protect himself from inappropriate touch.

Take advantage of the black and white thinking that characterizes HFA. Be clear and explicit: nobody except your parents and doctor are allowed to touch you under your pants. You are not allowed to touch anyone else’s private parts either. If they do it’s bad. You need to tell us right away. Even if they make you promise not to tell. Even if they threaten you. Even if they offer you a prize. If there are exceptions-like he needs help toileting or dressing - state those explicitly as well.