What would you have done?- stranger using your bathroom

amother

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 1:30 am

I was standing outside my house with my kids and a woman walks by, she was with another two young kids and asks me if she can use my bathroom. She said she has been out all day and really needs to use a bathroom. I was thinking to myself ‘you what!?!? No way!’ But I felt I had no choice and I let this random woman I do not know and will probably never see or recognise again, use my bathroom. I was not comfortable with it for some reason. What would you have done?

amother

Daffodil

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 1:33 am

if she was frum and looked sane I wouldn't think twice (in fact I have let someone in for this reason), what's she gonna do in my house already that I can't stand my ground over?

salt

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 1:34 am

We live right by a kids' playground. Kids come up and use our bathroom the whole time. Mainly kids who kind of know us, but sometimes others.

One of the mums once even asked me if I have a bedika cloth for her. Poor thing, she was probably so embarrassed to ask.

In your case, I would. If I felt uncomfortable letting into the house by herself, I'd come in and wait for her by the front door.

amother

Salmon

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 1:40 am

That's great that you said yes! I bet you really helped that woman out that day! Honestly, you probably helped her for much more than a day, because if you said "no" and she gd forbid had an accident, she might be traumatised to leave her house for a long time!

I would let someone who looked normal/I wasn't getting warning vibes.

When you have to go to the bathroom really bad, it's really important for you, and it's free for the person with the bathroom, so an easy "yes" for me, as long as I felt safe.

amother

Teal

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 2:51 am

salt wrote:

I live near a playground and don't allow random kid to use the bathroom ive made it clear so they don't rely on my bathroom. I used to kindly allow but my bathroom was left dirty literally urine on the seat etc

DrMom

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 2:55 am

amother OP wrote:

What does the bolded mean?

You don't believe that she had to go to the bathroom?
Or you think it was unreasonable of her to ask to use yours?

Rabbit613

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 3:28 am

A frum lady I would definitely let.
I actually did this. I was pregnant and desperate for the bathroom. I was actually mortified to ask but I had no other choice besides for having an accident or finding bushes.

notshanarishona

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 5:00 am

On Shabbos I for sure would let, any other day I would think most people would go into a business (store, library, restaurant, etc) over a private residence.

amother

Acacia

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 5:12 am

I've done that before with my kids. We were walking to someone on Shabbos and couldn't find the house amd my child needed a bathroom. We knocked on a random (frum person's) door and the family was happy to help, BH.

naomi2

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 5:45 am

For a frum woman for sure. You can always follow her to the bathroom and wait outside the door and escort her out of the house if you feel really uncomfortable.

amother

Dimgray

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 6:37 am

Why in the world not? Such an easy chessed.

Without two many details, I had a pregnant woman I had never met knock on my door practically jumping in pain and asked me if she could use my bathtub…. I said of course. (15 minutes later, she had a baby boy in my tub.)

amother

Crystal

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 6:39 am

amother Dimgray wrote:

Are most of us wondering if this is for real?!

Simple1

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 6:41 am

Yes absolutely I have let. One time it turned out it was a lady I knew from when I lived in a different neighborhood and lost touch with and we had a good shmuz.

Regarding the kids constantly using the bathroom, I think that would be more annoying. Maybe I would set up a rotation with the neighbors?

Amelia Bedelia

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 6:46 am

amother Dimgray wrote:

OMG! Amazing! What a chesed

amother

Oatmeal

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 6:55 am

amother Crystal wrote:

Are most of us wondering if this is for real?!

Yes. This is your reminder that some people are fabricating stories as they go along.

NechaMom

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 6:57 am

amother OP wrote:

Being that she was with kids I would believe her 100% and allow her to use my bathroom. If she’d be alone I’d probably be a little nervous (I don’t trust strangers. The world doesn’t lack crazies.) but I can’t imaging turning down such a request.

amother

Ultramarine

Sun, Aug 06 2023, 7:06 am

amother Dimgray wrote:

Mazel tov!!