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-> Working Women
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amother
OP
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 Mon, Sep 18 2023, 5:38 pm
DH lost his job recently and my freelancing has mostly run dry. We continue to do hishtadlus, lots of it, but I'm curious where emunah comes in when there is simply no money. (like really, really...)
I know in my heart that this is part of Hashem's plan (which by definition must be good for me) and I continue to daven and do hishtadlus but until Hashem's bounty comes our way, what are we to do????
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amother
Forsythia
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Mon, Sep 18 2023, 5:39 pm
We are in the same boat.
Literally just had to cancel my DD’s very important weekly therapy session just bec we are dry.
I keep telling hashem he runs the world and if he believes it’s what we need he should figure it out for us. I surrender to him.
I’m praying for you and for everyone else including myself.
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amother
Pewter
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Mon, Sep 18 2023, 5:54 pm
Are you Able to work?
My husband has been out of work for long long time.
Best of luck
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amother
Hyssop
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Mon, Sep 18 2023, 6:12 pm
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amother
Teal
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Mon, Sep 18 2023, 8:47 pm
Focus on every little positive in your life and thank Hashem for everything! IYH this door closed so that you can receive even more blessings! A better job for your husband with much better parnassah and more room for growth.
I was in the same place as you before and that's what got me through. It's a challenge but I forced myself to only think positive. Gratitude and positivity, always! Every time my husband interviewed for a job and didn't get it, I said Baruch Hashem! and made something special for dinner and we celebrated that Hashem was guiding us on the right path, and leading us towards bigger and better opportunities. In the end we saw tremendous bracha and it was true that my husband got a much better job that with much greater growth potential.
I scheduled text messages to myself so I would receive them throughout the day. They were all encouraging, positive messages.
Stay strong and stay positive and IYH you should see mazel and bracha and parnassah!
If you need support, Imamothers are here!
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amother
OP
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 4:34 am
Amen.
Teal, I did this for many months. I really focused on the positive. Did (still do) all the spiritual things one is meant to do for financial success. Said Nishmas (I still do). Kept learning about emunah, working on money blocks, and encouraging myself and DH but it has been SOOOO long and although we seem to be holding it together, we're not functioning in any shape or form.
(I debated writing everything that follows because I truly am blessed and I don't want to seem negative but I know that one day, when Hashem helps us, I'll be able to look back at this thread and marvel at Hashem's salvation.)
DH lost his job more than 6 months ago and his side gig has dwindled to a trickle.
My own freelance work has dwindled, too, after b"H many successful years.
We have several businesses (I.e. vessels) through which Hashem can easily send in the shefa but the few who did use our services of late didn't yet pay for whatever reason.
Job searches have been unnsucessful thus far.
Our car broke and no money to get a replacement and living in a remote area makes this doubly challenging. I.e. can't visit parents, can't get hold of various much-needed items etc.
Desperately need to consult with someone in regards to a child but don't have where to pay from.
Bills keep piling up but there's no where to pay from. And I absolutely HATE paying late or owing money. Need to pay before it goes to court.
Need to pay tuition ASAP.
Fridge/cupboards are bare. I'm on a restricted diet for health reasons which makes it exceptionally difficult and I feel hungry most of the time. I've been mostly managing for the kids with the little income we still have but DH and I just make do with whatever we can find. Nothing very substantial.
Keep reusing baking paper and silver foil whenever possible and use cut toilet rolls instead of tissues.
Havn't bought kids new Shabbos clothes in more than a year and they need it.
Husband's jacket looks terrible and needs to be replaced urgently.
My winter jacket (it's cold already) got damaged and is embarassing for me to wear.
Don't have a succah yet.
Seriously, the list goes on and it's come to a point where for all the gratefulness and positivity, I just want to roll up in a ball and cry. I know Hashem can change this all in an instant but until then, what's a person to do???
I am not open to receiving financial assistance so please don't offer (although I know how amazing women on here are), I just want to know what to do.
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amother
Leaf
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 7:29 am
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Can you get a job for now and not freelance? I had to do this
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amother
NeonOrange
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 8:24 am
I just listened to a very interesting podcast on Kosher Money- he interviewed Rabbi Daniel Glatstien. He spoke on this very subject, as well as honesty in business.
https://youtu.be/TuE78hhzrfA?s.....e1gsT
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amother
Peru
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 8:30 am
| amother OP wrote: | Amen.
Teal, I did this for many months. I really focused on the positive. Did (still do) all the spiritual things one is meant to do for financial success. Said Nishmas (I still do). Kept learning about emunah, working on money blocks, and encouraging myself and DH but it has been SOOOO long and although we seem to be holding it together, we're not functioning in any shape or form.
(I debated writing everything that follows because I truly am blessed and I don't want to seem negative but I know that one day, when Hashem helps us, I'll be able to look back at this thread and marvel at Hashem's salvation.)
DH lost his job more than 6 months ago and his side gig has dwindled to a trickle.
My own freelance work has dwindled, too, after b"H many successful years.
We have several businesses (I.e. vessels) through which Hashem can easily send in the shefa but the few who did use our services of late didn't yet pay for whatever reason.
Job searches have been unnsucessful thus far.
Our car broke and no money to get a replacement and living in a remote area makes this doubly challenging. I.e. can't visit parents, can't get hold of various much-needed items etc.
Desperately need to consult with someone in regards to a child but don't have where to pay from.
Bills keep piling up but there's no where to pay from. And I absolutely HATE paying late or owing money. Need to pay before it goes to court.
Need to pay tuition ASAP.
Fridge/cupboards are bare. I'm on a restricted diet for health reasons which makes it exceptionally difficult and I feel hungry most of the time. I've been mostly managing for the kids with the little income we still have but DH and I just make do with whatever we can find. Nothing very substantial.
Keep reusing baking paper and silver foil whenever possible and use cut toilet rolls instead of tissues.
Havn't bought kids new Shabbos clothes in more than a year and they need it.
Husband's jacket looks terrible and needs to be replaced urgently.
My winter jacket (it's cold already) got damaged and is embarassing for me to wear.
Don't have a succah yet.
Seriously, the list goes on and it's come to a point where for all the gratefulness and positivity, I just want to roll up in a ball and cry. I know Hashem can change this all in an instant but until then, what's a person to do???
I am not open to receiving financial assistance so please don't offer (although I know how amazing women on here are), I just want to know what to do. |
I'm in the same boat. Honestly there is nothing we can do. If we make more money Hashem will make it need to be spent somewhere. We have exactly what we need. Just need to keep holding on. I'm saying this to myself
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amother
Peru
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 8:31 am
| amother Leaf wrote: | | Can you get a job for now and not freelance? I had to do this |
Ok, but this is not about emunah. She's asking about emunah.
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gottago
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 9:00 am
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I just want to say that I feel for you. May HaShem send you Shefa Bracha very soon, aiming with peace of mind, health, wealth, joy and all good things.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 9:30 am
| amother Leaf wrote: | | Can you get a job for now and not freelance? I had to do this |
I've been looking for a job but haven't found anything so far. In fact, I just received an email letting me know that my last attempt, which seemed quite promising, won't work out for various reasons.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 9:42 am
I don't have WhatsApp but I've been learning from other sources.
I know and believe that Hashem can turns things around in an instant but right now I feel like we're at the bottom of the pit.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 9:46 am
| amother Peru wrote: | | I'm in the same boat. Honestly there is nothing we can do. If we make more money Hashem will make it need to be spent somewhere. We have exactly what we need. Just need to keep holding on. I'm saying this to myself |
I'm sorry you're struggling too. It does seem like the more we earn the more expenses we incur. Which makes sense from a hashkafic standpoint as we know that the amount we are meant to have is predetermined, however, how does Hashem want us to survive?
If I sound overwhelmed its because we're juggling other difficulties right now as well and the monetory aspect just magnifies everything in a very challenging way. I wish I knew what Hashem wanted from us.
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amother
Trillium
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 9:51 am
Not too long ago we were in your shoes. My husband bh recently found a job, but was out of work for almost 5 months and looking for a new job for 7 months (his prior job gave him a heads up they were getting rid of his position 2 months prior to laying him off). BH I do have a good job, but my salary doesn't cover mortgage, tuition and basic daily living.
The professional job market is horrible now. In the past he had many different companies interviewing every week and this time he was lucky if he got one interview every few weeks.
My husband was so down. I kept telling him that his self worth and my view of him didn't change weather he was working or not.
He tried to keep his spirts up but really struggled with it. He learned bitchon books and sefarim every single night. At one point he "threw up his hands" and said "Hashem, I give up. I tried my best and there are no bites. I did everything I can to find a job and now I give up and it's all in Your hands". (I wasn't there but this was the basic gist of what he told me.) Very shortly after he "threw in the towel" he had an interview that led to his current job.
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amother
OP
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 10:08 am
| amother Trillium wrote: | Not too long ago we were in your shoes. My husband bh recently found a job, but was out of work for almost 5 months and looking for a new job for 7 months (his prior job gave him a heads up they were getting rid of his position 2 months prior to laying him off). BH I do have a good job, but my salary doesn't cover mortgage, tuition and basic daily living.
The professional job market is horrible now. In the past he had many different companies interviewing every week and this time he was lucky if he got one interview every few weeks.
My husband was so down. I kept telling him that his self worth and my view of him didn't change weather he was working or not.
He tried to keep his spirts up but really struggled with it. He learned bitchon books and sefarim every single night. At one point he "threw up his hands" and said "Hashem, I give up. I tried my best and there are no bites. I did everything I can to find a job and now I give up and it's all in Your hands". (I wasn't there but this was the basic gist of what he told me.) Very shortly after he "threw in the towel" he had an interview that led to his current job. |
Thanks for sharing. I know with my full heart that hishtadles is a mere facade and Hashem completely and fully runs the show. I've cried my eyes out and given it all up to Him so many times but we all have our individual tafkid and I guess Hashem wants something more/else from us. I just wish I knew what it was. I'm so happy your husband has a job. It must be a real relief!
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amother
Plum
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 10:18 am
| amother OP wrote: | Amen.
Teal, I did this for many months. I really focused on the positive. Did (still do) all the spiritual things one is meant to do for financial success. Said Nishmas (I still do). Kept learning about emunah, working on money blocks, and encouraging myself and DH but it has been SOOOO long and although we seem to be holding it together, we're not functioning in any shape or form.
(I debated writing everything that follows because I truly am blessed and I don't want to seem negative but I know that one day, when Hashem helps us, I'll be able to look back at this thread and marvel at Hashem's salvation.)
DH lost his job more than 6 months ago and his side gig has dwindled to a trickle.
My own freelance work has dwindled, too, after b"H many successful years.
We have several businesses (I.e. vessels) through which Hashem can easily send in the shefa but the few who did use our services of late didn't yet pay for whatever reason.
Job searches have been unnsucessful thus far.
Our car broke and no money to get a replacement and living in a remote area makes this doubly challenging. I.e. can't visit parents, can't get hold of various much-needed items etc.
Desperately need to consult with someone in regards to a child but don't have where to pay from.
Bills keep piling up but there's no where to pay from. And I absolutely HATE paying late or owing money. Need to pay before it goes to court.
Need to pay tuition ASAP.
Fridge/cupboards are bare. I'm on a restricted diet for health reasons which makes it exceptionally difficult and I feel hungry most of the time. I've been mostly managing for the kids with the little income we still have but DH and I just make do with whatever we can find. Nothing very substantial.
Keep reusing baking paper and silver foil whenever possible and use cut toilet rolls instead of tissues.
Havn't bought kids new Shabbos clothes in more than a year and they need it.
Husband's jacket looks terrible and needs to be replaced urgently.
My winter jacket (it's cold already) got damaged and is embarassing for me to wear.
Don't have a succah yet.
Seriously, the list goes on and it's come to a point where for all the gratefulness and positivity, I just want to roll up in a ball and cry. I know Hashem can change this all in an instant but until then, what's a person to do???
I am not open to receiving financial assistance so please don't offer (although I know how amazing women on here are), I just want to know what to do. |
So sorry for all this, I hope hashem has an amazing plan for you real soon! I know youre not up to taking but if I have clothing/coats in great condition that ill be donating anyway would you consider taking?
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amother
OP
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Tue, Sep 19 2023, 11:30 am
| amother Plum wrote: | | So sorry for all this, I hope hashem has an amazing plan for you real soon! I know youre not up to taking but if I have clothing/coats in great condition that ill be donating anyway would you consider taking? |
No, Plum, but I do appreciate the gesture. Tizku l'mitzvos and amen to your good wishes.
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amother
OP
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Thu, Dec 14 2023, 9:30 am
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Still struggling and wondering why our efforts keep falling flat. Again and again and again.
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amother
Bellflower
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Thu, Dec 14 2023, 10:05 am
I wish I had sage advice
I don't
I'm in a very similar position
working on positivity emunah bitachon
I started thinking that I'm relying more on my 'efforts' of keeping calm cool and believing and that I'm not 'really believing'
The expenses are simply crushing
The emotional toll of not being able to ________ is soul crushing
Wishing us both and anyone else a nes Chanuka
All I keep telling myself is 'B'h we're alive' B'h we have for whom to provide. B'h we have hope
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