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Forum
-> Pregnancy & Childbirth
-> Baby Names
amother
OP
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 12:28 pm
I just read through the R Chaim thread on names and found it so intriguing.
My great grandmother had a beautiful name (from Tanach if that matters) and many of my cousins were given that name.
One of my relatives recently pointed out how most of my cousins that were given that name (5+) all have big nisyonos. Health issues, divorce, mental health issues, older single and probably more that I’m not privy to.
My great grandmother herself died in her 50s from health issues.
I actually considered naming my daughter after this grandmother, but was too afraid to.
Anyone else ever seen anything like this in their own families? Is there such a thing as a name having bad mazel?
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naomi2
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 12:30 pm
I don't have any evidence but based on what you wrote I wouldnt do it. Or at least ask an Adam gadol
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zaq
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 12:48 pm
Use the name paired with a "good" name like Mazal or Bracha.
Before you go about blaming a name, check out rational factors. Certainly when it comes to health, things often run in families, either because of genetics or because of similar lifestyle factors. Look at the cousins who didn't have the same name. Are their lives all perfectly peachy, or are you choosing to focus on the problems with the cousins with great-grandma's name and ignoring the tzores the others have?
And of course AYLOR.
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amother
Honeydew
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 1:20 pm
I don't know how much is 'superstition'. I know my mother and grandmother were quite into preferring not to name for family members who had a hard life or severe illness. There was one particular family name that it seemed that most of them had serious lengthy illnesses. So I don't know. I would ask a shaila if there's a name you're concerned about.
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amother
Dodgerblue
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 1:41 pm
I don't think this is real... sorry.
EVERYONE has hard challenges in life. EVERYONE.
These people would have had the same hard challenges had their names been something else.
Name your baby what you want. Love her, help her, support her. Make sure she learns resilience (model it) and that everything comes from Hashem.
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amother
Cadetblue
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 1:43 pm
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amother
Quince
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 1:51 pm
Yes I heard of it . In my family we have one name that we see issues with. Not every single one of them but most with this specific name. I personally wouldn't give. Ask a ruv who understands these things. It's definitely real.
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amother
Amaryllis
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 1:57 pm
I don't know, but there are a few certain names where I seem to dislike everyone with this name.
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amother
Magenta
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 9:31 pm
Yes it's real!!! We have such a case in my family and husband's family. All family members in extended family with specific name had unusual tzaros (grandparent with the name was a very special person)
E.g. all girls with said name got divorced...
Other family- never married...
This is am extended family after great grandparent so it was 2nd cousins all suffering.
Our parents begged us not to give said names even if calling after a family member "from the other side"
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amother
OP
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 9:53 pm
amother Dodgerblue wrote: | I don't think this is real... sorry.
EVERYONE has hard challenges in life. EVERYONE.
These people would have had the same hard challenges had their names been something else.
Name your baby what you want. Love her, help her, support her. Make sure she learns resilience (model it) and that everything comes from Hashem. |
I’d like to think the same way as well. But again, the people named for her don’t have the run of the mill regular issues. This is more. I don’t want to go in to details in case some relatives are on here. But by health issues-I mean very rare disease, and the mental health issue-also very bad.
What really struck me is that out of all my cousins families, it’s really only the ones with this specific name that are really suffering. The rest seem to be fine. There’s no other divorced cousins, there are no other ones still not married etc. It’s like they got all the bad luck in the family.
And my baby is named already, and we did not name her with that name. Even though my husband and I planned on giving that name months before she was born. And I honestly wasn’t aware of the mazal of the name then. When she was born that name just didn’t suit her. I can’t explain it, but I told me husband that I just couldn’t give it to her. We named her a totally different name. It was only a few weeks after that someone pointed out that the name seems to bring bad mazal. I never thought about it before that.
I find it interesting that so many people here don’t think there’s a mazal around names. I really think there is!
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amother
Sage
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 10:39 pm
There definitely is something to it which is why many people won’t name after someone who had a hard life or a lot of nisyonos and even those that died young.
Some add a name to “alleviate” this connection or whatever you want to say it is.
Personally I know a family that a few people named after another family member who was killed and 2 of the 3 named after were also killed at a young age. The 3rd was injured with a life changing injury.
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amother
Hawthorn
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 10:42 pm
Kind of related, I had an aunt with a very beautiful name. Not going to post it because it's so unique, I never heard it anywhere else. Anyway she died by suicide many years ago and nobody has named their kids after her. Not her own kids, nor nieces and nephews. One of my kids recently heard her name and wondered if, when she grows up, she could name her child that. I didn't know what to tell her. Bad mazal to that name? Is it so distant it doesn't matter?
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amother
Dustypink
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 11:05 pm
So, we shouldn't memorialize people who were killed in the Holocaust or by terrorists at an early age? It's not enough they were deprived of life, we should deprive them of a living memorial, too?
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amother
Lightgreen
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Thu, Oct 19 2023, 11:41 pm
I’ve heard that naming after people killed al kiddush Hashem, such as in the Holocaust-is in a different category than other people who died tragically or young; and that it is fine to do so.
Maybe some people add another name anyway-not sure. But there are definitely many people named for Holocaust victims.
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amother
Apple
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Fri, Oct 20 2023, 12:22 am
See service of the heart by moshe wolfson who describes how your name is your destiny. This is why we give hashem our name before we testify in shamayim. Did you live TRUE To the mission contained in your name???
I’m a Miriam and my husband keeps calling me “Pooh” and I said what is with this?? And then I remembered Puah!! Sorry if that was so random but just though it was cool.
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amother
Steelblue
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Fri, Oct 20 2023, 1:24 am
Yes in our family whoever was named after a specific relative who was divorced plus other details regarding divorce, the same thing happened to them!
I myself am named after a specific person who I'm not sure their history but whoever is named after that person has an extremely challenging life including myself. I will tell my kids not to name after me ever.
Btw does the soul enjoy any perks when anyone names after them?
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amother
Azure
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Fri, Oct 20 2023, 1:33 am
There’s more to names than just the actual name. A lot has to do with the time and date the child is born paired with the name. Some names are better mazel in certain months.
Also there is the concept of naming after a specific person and having that mazel but it’s not the actual name for example naming for a great grandmother named Sarah who had a hard life may be different for the child than naming Sarah after Sarah imainu.
It’s a complex and esoteric topic…
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amother
Mistyrose
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Fri, Oct 20 2023, 1:43 am
amother Azure wrote: | There’s more to names than just the actual name. A lot has to do with the time and date the child is born paired with the name. Some names are better mazel in certain months.
Also there is the concept of naming after a specific person and having that mazel but it’s not the actual name for example naming for a great grandmother named Sarah who had a hard life may be different for the child than naming Sarah after Sarah imainu.
It’s a complex and esoteric topic… |
Agree..there's more to it than just having the actual name. I know someone who gave Temima- her daughter should be pure. Her daughter is very open minded, like any other girl. I know a Mazel that has pretty bad mazel. Really there is more to it. The main thing parents have to have a feeling to give the name
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amother
Hotpink
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Fri, Oct 20 2023, 1:52 am
My mother always begged us not to name after her.
Her name is Leah. She says just like Leah’s eyes were red from crying, so too, her eyes.
My mother had an extremely challenged life, and wouldn’t want that mazal for her grandchildren.
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