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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Our Challenging Children (gifted, ADHD, sensitive, defiant)

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amother

Mon, Oct 30 2023, 9:19 pm

Why are parents against medication if there is a clear diagnosis? Why is it last resort? If your child has a diagnosis for an infection it would be given immediately? Trying to understand this, not judging

amother

Magenta

Mon, Oct 30 2023, 9:23 pm

I think people may feel like it changes the child's personality. There are also a lot of side effects... I'm not anti medication btw

amother

Babypink

Mon, Oct 30 2023, 9:24 pm

It depends on how the child is. My son is ok most of the time without meds. But in over stimulating situations like school he gets overwhelmed. Medication helps him focus. We don't give it on non school days. My other child has combined. She cannot live without medication. As they mature, many people can function without it and learn coping techniques. It's not exactly like diabetes (which it is often compared to), there is a range.

amother

Calendula

Mon, Oct 30 2023, 9:24 pm

Not really comparable. An infection is dangerous and temporary. Putting a developing child on meds can make them dependent on it for life, there is a possibility of things getting better with puberty and maturity, and some people don't need meds they can function with other aids. Also it is over diagnosed nowadays, so in a case where it was a thorough eval and the kid really needs most are not against it. It's when the school thinks the solution to every problem is dumping kids on meds, that's where people fight it. Like a post today with no diagnosis and instead of pushing for the child to have a diagnosis and help medication was automatically pushed.

amother

Oleander

Mon, Oct 30 2023, 9:25 pm

It's medication for life. That's not something to take lightly. There are side effects, some serious. It can take a lot of trial and error to find something that works. It's not like taking motrin.

Is it needed for many? Sure, but I can totally see why someone would not make it the first response.

amother

Lotus

Mon, Oct 30 2023, 9:34 pm

For starters, adhd diagnoses are purely clinical, so medicating it based on symptoms would be like a dr looking at your throat and prescribing antibiotics because it looks red without running a culture. If drs actually tested neurotransmitter levels or ran brain scans and medicated accordingly that would make more sense to me.

amother

Firebrick

Mon, Oct 30 2023, 9:42 pm

All you people saying medication is for life, it's not necessarily. It's to get them to the point where they can function without it. I was on meds in college but have been fine ever since.

amother

Crimson

Mon, Oct 30 2023, 9:44 pm

Very often someone has the capacity while taking medication to learn and implement skills and coping mechanisms that seem impossible off meds. Once they're integrated, many people do wean off. It's definitely not always for life.

amother

Oleander

Mon, Oct 30 2023, 10:59 pm

amother Crimson wrote:

That's more likely to be true of an older teen or young adult than of a 10 year old.

amother

Cobalt

Mon, Oct 30 2023, 11:29 pm

amother Firebrick wrote:

All you people saying medication is for life, it's not necessarily. It's to get them to the point where they can function without it. I was on meds in college but have been fine ever since.

Many people only need it for certain situations, like classes they don't get to choose. Others, as someone else said, use it to work on their skills. But many people do use it for life.

And yes, the side effects can be brutal. And while many people say, "It doesn't have to change your personality- keep looking for the right one", in some people, there isn't a right one. Either it really does change them, or the side effects are too much (and when the side effects are really bad, they can have major life consequences, like a kid getting violent.) Either way, the kid/adult may refuse to take it and to try any more..

amother

Seagreen

Mon, Oct 30 2023, 11:33 pm

amother OP wrote:

Side point no I don't give meds immediately. I never gave abx for an ear infection. I give abx for strep and for other cases (ex stitches in mouth) but I don't give it left and right. Meds aren't candy and they all have side effects you can't see.

amother

Milk

Tue, Oct 31 2023, 6:33 am

amother Calendula wrote:

I think over diagnosed is just something people say. Who knows if it is? When someone really has it it is pretty evident and they need the medication in an obvious way… AND are much more functional capable and happy once they have it

amother

Clematis

Tue, Oct 31 2023, 7:23 am

My daughter needs ADHD meds to function. Her distractibility is debilitating. Her personality has changed and she is moody and irritable. It is so so sad, we keep trying medications but we still haven't found one. My heart breaks for her. We just want to help her thrive.

amother

Babypink

Tue, Oct 31 2023, 7:35 am

amother Clematis wrote:

Is she in a regular school? Or a class of 3-6? My daughter gets easily distracted and cannot be in a regular classroom. She also has very understanding teachers who understand her limitations and work with her so she is calmer.

LovesHashem

Tue, Oct 31 2023, 7:51 am

Medications have side affects.

A main side effect of lots of ADHD medications are issues with eating and weight, along with a lack of motivation, and dullness of feelings, suppression of personality and depression and anxiety. Taking an anxiety or depression medication along, comes with its own side affects too and may not fully help.

amother

Azure

Tue, Oct 31 2023, 7:53 am

Because medication comes with side effects. Sometimes you are trading in one problem for another.

amother

Blueberry

Tue, Oct 31 2023, 8:12 am

[quote="amother Oleander"]It's medication for life. That's not something to take lightly. There are side effects, some serious. It can take a lot of trial and error to find something that works. It's not like taking motrin.

Is it needed for many? Sure, but I can totally see why someone would not make it the first response.[/quote

Why would it be a medication for life? It’s not even a medication for days! Most of the people I know on it don’t take it on shabbos or in the summer or when they grow up and learn to manage their symptoms without it… I don’t see it as a “medication for life” at all! (Although I’m sure some people do take it for life which is fine with me)

amother

Forestgreen

Tue, Oct 31 2023, 8:21 am

amother Clematis wrote:

My 8 yo daughter has inattentive ADD and difficulties with emotional regulation. Medication was really difficult with her, making her violent, irritable, forget to eat, etc. After hearing anecdotal evidence we have wanted her off her medication and now give her saffron twice a day and the results have been miraculous. It has all the benefits of the mess without the side effects. I don't know how it works but it does

This is the one we use
https://www.iherb.com/pr/bio-n.....54808

miami85

Tue, Oct 31 2023, 8:26 am

I think part of the hesitation is because it is a "checklist" diagnosis vs. "in vitro"/specimen there's little way to know with veracity that it is "ADHD" vs. "Anxiety" vs. "overactive brain from high intelligence" and to what extent these differ from each other.

I really wish that they would move away from the "hyperactivity" name and call it something more appropriate such as "neurotransmitter dysregulation disorder"--because that's what it is. The medications help the brain manage the neurotransmitters better, and the analogy I use is "better tune the mental radio." Calms the brain static and helps the child focus on one thing at a time.

The wonderful thing about modern times is that now that we understand that there are more than one kind of ADHD, and there are several different medications that address different aspects of the symptoms and with fine tuning it can make a world of difference.

What frustrates me as a school psychologist is when I get referrals that are loaded with "can't focus....can't concentrate...fidgety..." but the kid doesn't have a diagnosis and it's like "what would you like for me to tell you?" You don't want medication? Ok, but an IEP isn't a magic wand that will make your kid suddenly focus. If you don't want to medicate, you need to change something to alter the way your child is handling neurotranmitters.

There's a book called Naturally Focused that discusses different possibilities and alternatives to medication.

As for getting "hooked on a stimulant"---um, most adults are addicted to coffee. In fact when we couldn't get my son's medication for a few days this year, we were giving him coffee for those days. Fortunately my son's manifestation of ADHD is he gets a "bit extra silly", "ebullient" and "stuck" but I feel for the parents whose child gets angry, defiant, bouncing-off-the-walls, hurting others. etc.

There is current research further dividing ADHD into 7 subtypes which I think goes a lot further to explain different manifestations of ADHD and how it differs from Autism. I haven't gotten clarity of how close it is to becoming mainstream theory, but it is gaining.

amother

Heather

Tue, Oct 31 2023, 8:40 am

amother Calendula wrote:

I choose a child to have medication in their blood stream that has been proven healthy/harmless as opposed to toxic shame coursing through their veins every time they feel a stab of ‘I am not good enough due to feeling different/incapable due to my unmedicated ADHD.

I choose meds over a life of addiction and rage issues due to untreated ADHD.

I choose meds over a life of relationship challenges due to saying no to a pill which HKBH sent to us in His wisdom.

We all need to make very educated decisions in every area of our lives. Specifically in areas where we are discussing the future of a human and ultimately the generations this human will build.

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