Baby sleep method and sleep as an older child

amother

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 9:14 am

How did you put your baby to sleep and how hard was it to put them to sleep as a toddler and child?
I nurse my 11 month old to sleep and am getting advice from people that it will create problems later on.
I am interested in hearing about the experiences of others.
For those who nursed their babies to sleep, was it very difficult to wean them and to put them to sleep once they were weaned?
For those who used other methods for babies, what were they, how effective were they, and was it difficult to put them to sleep as a toddler and child?

(In the poll, by extraordinarily difficult I mean more difficult than within the average range. If you have more than one child, select what's true for the majority and specify in your response.)

Edit: I made a spin-off corrected poll, so if you don't mind voting in that one too, that would be helpful.

amother

Chicory

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 9:22 am

Im bh on my 6th baby that I nurse to sleep, and no issues when they were older.

I did stop night nursing at 20 months old, and I started laying next to them. I also put them straight into a bed, from bed sharing to their own, And then telling them I will come check on them soon..

The trick is to do what works for you now, dont worry about it later..

amother

Eggplant

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 9:27 am

I had ppl Convince me to let my kids cry it out and “sleep train them” and I regret it terribly. They deserve and need the security.

amother

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 9:44 am

amother Chicory wrote:

Why did you delete this?

I was trying to figure out how to edit the poll, because it's missing the first option. When that didn't work I tried to delete it and start again but it didn't delete the poll so I put it back. I ended up making a s/o poll, hopefully that won't mess up the results.

amother

Holly

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 10:58 am

amother Rainbow wrote:

I’m nursing my 6th baby to sleep. It’s a wonderful thing to do. I strongly encourage it.

This. I’ve heard of so many babies who were sleep trained as babies and then as toddlers wake up during the night etc etc or have a difficult time to fall asleep. Sleep is NOT linear. Babies are not robots. Just because someone’s baby was a perfect and the best sleeper ever doesn’t mean he or she won’t have any trouble when they’re older. We can’t expect a child never to wake up at night and yes sometimes they need support to fall back asleep. We’ll all sleep when our kids are in colllege. Lol

amother

Marigold

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:02 am

I nursed all my babies to sleep, and none have had any issues later on bh.
Nursing/feeding/rocking our babies to sleep, is the way it's supposed to be.

amother

Bone

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:04 am

A developmental OT told me that by 6 months the goal should be for babies to be able to put themselves to sleep (don't rock/ nurse them until they're totally sleeping)

amother

Marigold

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:07 am

amother Bone wrote:

A developmental OT told me that by 6 months the goal should be for babies to be able to put themselves to sleep (don't rock/ nurse them until they're totally sleeping)

This isn't the way it's supposed to be naturally. This is just a modern opinion. Babies aren't supposed to be independent in anything other than breathing & pooping/peeing.

BrisketBoss

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:09 am

amother Bone wrote:

A developmental OT told me that by 6 months the goal should be for babies to be able to put themselves to sleep (don't rock/ nurse them until they're totally sleeping)

I mean...did she provide any reasoning for that?

If you do something for longer then you may reach an age where it's more emotionally difficult to stop if mom still wants to before the child wants to. Not really the biggest deal though, and maybe mom won't want to stop.

BrisketBoss

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:11 am

I think I stopped nursing my first child to sleep around two months, and she slept through the night too. (She's high sleep needs, always slept a ton as a baby and toddler.) Second child was about six months. Third child is four months and mostly only nursing for night sleep at this point. It's hard to nurse to sleep during the day with the older siblings around.

No extraordinary difficulties here.

amother

Brass

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:17 am

When they were babies they fell asleep nursing and I’d transfer them to the bassinet. But I also tried to put them down awake for some naps. Starting at 3-4 months I’d nurse earlier than the time they would be tired, I’d swaddle and put them down awake and they would go to sleep. I did find that around the 2 year old mark they’d resist sleep. But I’d just put them give them a few minutes of attention and leave, once in a wails they would call me back I’d give some attention and then say it’s time to sleep and leave.

amother

Holly

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:17 am

amother Bone wrote:

A developmental OT told me that by 6 months the goal should be for babies to be able to put themselves to sleep (don't rock/ nurse them until they're totally sleeping)

Did she give you sources as to why this should be done? I’m an OT and wouldn’t make a blanket statement like that. What was her reasoning

amother

Bone

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:23 am

amother Holly wrote:

Did she give you sources as to why this should be done? I’m an OT and wouldn’t make a blanket statement like that. What was her reasoning

It was a while ago so I know longer recall exactly but I think for self regulation.

She is very well regarded on this site (Amy Guttmann)

amother

Eggplant

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:26 am

amother Bone wrote:

A developmental OT told me that by 6 months the goal should be for babies to be able to put themselves to sleep (don't rock/ nurse them until they're totally sleeping)

Please find a new OT. It is not in her jurisdiction to say such a thing. FYI there is no such thing as a “Developmental OT”. She’s a pediatric OT. Stay far away from someone like this calling herself something different to make others think she specializes in an area and has more expertise then a regular OT, and giving “advice” that is not her business or jurisdiction to give are huge red flags.

amother

Rainbow

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:26 am

amother Bone wrote:

A developmental OT told me that by 6 months the goal should be for babies to be able to put themselves to sleep (don't rock/ nurse them until they're totally sleeping)

This is false. Perhaps you misunderstood her.

amother

Holly

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:29 am

amother Bone wrote:

It was a while ago so I know longer recall exactly but I think for self regulation.

She is very well regarded on this site (Amy Guttmann)

Babies eventually learn to self regulate by being regulated by the caregiver. Children are not developmentally capable of self regulating or self soothing. They can co-regulate- they rely on support of a calm caregiver to regulate.
Sleep is a biological function it’s not a skill. Learning to ride a bike is a skill. We are born knowing how to sleep. It’s not something you need to teach your baby to do.

amother

Eggplant

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:29 am

amother Bone wrote:

It was a while ago so I know longer recall exactly but I think for self regulation.

She is very well regarded on this site (Amy Guttmann)

That’s ridiculous. There’s no baby in the world that can self-regulate at 6months old. Neuroscience and every leading child expert strongly disagrees with this. A baby needs co-regulation in order to self -regulate later on. Shame on her.

baked ziti

Wed, Nov 08 2023, 11:31 am

There are many ways children will develop self regulation skills. It doesn't have to be through sleep training. I nursed my kids to sleep and so far didn't have any issues down the line. One of my kids was attached to me from day one and at 5 still needs me to lie in bed with him but he's gradually letting me leave the room here and there. I won't regret the housework that didn't get done at night, but I would regret not giving him the security he needs and the chance to gain sleep independence at his rate.