Lakewood Bubble | Imamother

small bean

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:05 am

I was born and raised in lakewood. Got married and stayed in lakewood. I'm real deal lakewood. My husband went to the rally. No one in lakewood, said a negative word to us about it. I actually feel like all my lakewood family and friends are free thinkers, who do what's right for them.

Why on imamother, am I always being told about a bubble? Where is this bubble?

amother

Aconite

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:08 am

It doesnt have to do if someone was born and raised there. It's just a type.
Is your dh in BMG? Either full time kollel or former kollel member but still associate with their RY as his main connection? IF not, that's why you don't see it.

BTW I know people this "Lakewood bubble" type who don't live in Lakewood. It exists in Brooklyn too!

amother

Lilac

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:09 am

Now that everyone has internet at work it doesn’t really exist anymore.

20 years ago Lakewood was a lot more insular.

I agree with you about the rally. It just wasn’t a topic of conversation.

small bean

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:10 am

My husband was in BMG and still.learns as much as he can, sometimes full days (he's self employed).

I don't know really what you're talking about. I can't think of anyone who fits these descriptions.

mha3484

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:26 am

I grew up in suburban America in a sub division culture and its the same kind of bubble Lakewood is if you choose it to be one. Like the suburb I grew up in, Lakewood is a suburb with all that comes with it. We never had random people walk down my street as a kid, we all knew everyone, we are all similar income, similar values, went to the same schools. Had the same life goals. I personally got into volunteering in high school and that got me out of my daled amos which was good for me but I know lots of people who never left the bubble.

I have lived for the past 15 years in semi urban America and its not comparable to life in suburbia at all.

Neither is better then the other but they are way different life experiences so I think thats what people mean when they call it a bubble.

keym

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:26 am

I do know people in the "Lakewood bubble". 85% are under 26. Learning, living in an apartment near yeshiva, wife with school job.

I do know some in the "Lakewood bubble" who are older. Very very very yeshivish. No publications not even the Shopper and the Voice. Really deliberately insulated. And no Internet.
They didn't even know about the rally.

small bean

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:34 am

amother Hawthorn wrote:

I’m originally from brooklyn and worked in big Lakewood offices and oh is there a bubble!

Your co-workers were lakewood people? Or people like you who moved to lakewood?

amother

Kiwi

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:36 am

Majority is not in a bubble.

But there is a group of very very yeshivish (long term kollel or Klei kodesh, no internet, no texting) who is definitely in a bubble. And the ones in the bubble tend to be close-minded, judgmental, and really cannot understand or absorb others' perspectives.
They literally cannot understand how people went to the rally when R' Sorotzkin, the gadol hador, said not to.

small bean

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:38 am

amother Kiwi wrote:

So where are these people? I grew up in the heart of Lakewood and don't know them.

amother

Kiwi

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:40 am

keym wrote:

Regarding your last sentence- the yeshivish people I know did know about the rally, but only after hearing R' Sorotzkin say it's assur. When I tried to explain the other side to them, they got very upset and told they cannot have a conversation with me if I put down gedolei yisroel (which I was NOT doing).

And I happen to agree that men should not leave the besi medrash to go to the rally. But what upset me is they way they talked down about the people who did go

amother

Oatmeal

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:40 am

amother Lilac wrote:

Now that everyone has internet at work it doesn’t really exist anymore.

20 years ago Lakewood was a lot more insular.

I agree with you about the rally. It just wasn’t a topic of conversation.

I'm living in Lakewood over thirty years ago. Thirty years ago although the personal standards that people kept were more insular they themselves were inherently less insular. Most people in Lakewood had grown up in a far less insular background and had close relative out of Lakewood who did not share all their Lakewood haskafa . Plus the fact that the overwhelming majority of Lakewood residents were non-Jewish also limited the insularity. Thirty years ago a place like Lakewood mesivta was considered so extreme that even the most Yeshivish parents sent their sons out of town. Among other things they wanted them to have a high school secular education. Today which very yeshivish Lakewood parent cares about a thing like that?

amother

Kiwi

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:42 am

small bean wrote:

So where are these people? I grew up in the heart of Lakewood and don't know them.

I can introduce you to my sisters-in-law and some of my high school friends...

amother

Hawthorn

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:46 am

small bean wrote:

Ok what schools do these people send to, where do they live? And what makes them in a bubble?

Mostly yeshivish schools in Lakewood. They live in Yeshiva area. They’re close minded and judgemental. Also read a letter in the voice a few weeks ago from someone telling Morahs that it’s not right that they start at 930 because it makes them come late to Seder. I honestly couldn’t believe an adult can write such a letter - the letter dripped with entitlement

amother

Kiwi

Fri, Nov 17 2023, 11:46 am

small bean wrote:

Ok what schools do these people send to, where do they live? And what makes them in a bubble?

They have no internet access and don't really read newspapers either. They rely completely on their roshei yeshiva to tell them what to do every step of the way (like who to vote). They think we are completely safe in America and anyone who is worried is crazy.

And btw it's not just in the area of politics. My sisters in law are extremely sheltered and naive in general. Like in the area of pregnancy, they have no clue about anything. I once mentioned to a sister in law (who had a few kids) that I took progesterone in the beginning of a pregnancy to try to prevent a miscarriage. She innocently asked me "what's progesterone?" My jaw dropped. I'm like sweetheart, do you have ANY IDEA what happens in your body during the monthly cycle and pregnancy?