Eating fish with milchigs

amother

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 5:54 pm

Having a disagreement, I mean discussion with my DH and wanted to get a broader audience perspective. Are there some (frum) sfardim who do eat milchigs with fish?

Adding a poll to for sfardi respondents 😊

SunnyDayz

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 8:39 pm

I am not sefardi myself, but have plenty of sefardi friends. I don't believe any of them eat fish and dairy together, it's definitely come up in discussion before.

amother

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 9:39 pm

SunnyDayz wrote:

I am not sefardi myself, but have plenty of sefardi friends. I don't believe any of them eat fish and dairy together, it's definitely come up in discussion before.

Thanks for the reply

amother

Anemone

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 9:45 pm

We follow Maran . Our grandparents in (Halab) Aleppo didn’t eat fish and cheese together.

amother

Tiffanyblue

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 9:47 pm

Well, originally my DH who is sefardi misunderstood something and thought it was okay for us to eat dairy and fish together. Fast forward 2 years later, he discovered it is actually absolutely not okay. Bye-bye tuna melts!

amother

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 9:58 pm

amother Tiffanyblue wrote:

That must have been an adjustment!

amother

Bellflower

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 10:04 pm

amother Tiffanyblue wrote:

We don’t eat fish a dairy, but I don’t think it’s a hard no like you wouldn’t be actually going against halacha to eat it. But AYLOR. Would parve cheese on tuna work? Funny I was raised on tuna melts before my mother found out that we don’t do it. I really enjoyed them. Now the idea isn’t so appealing. I really don’t love tuna.

amother

Wallflower

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 11:05 pm

The source of the minhag is specific to certain types of dairy. My family (dh and I and our kids) don't eat, my parents don't, but I have one brother who has sephardic semicha and is a Rav who does based on reasons that he's expounded on but that I didnt pay much attention to (because we're not changing our minhag).

amother

Melon

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 11:12 pm

I'm not sefardi and neither is dh. Grew up eating tuna melts, in-laws don't. Now it feels weird eating fish with dairy. (At same meal yes, but not in one dish, mamish together)
Luckily I've heard of such a thing before I was married (in camp, girl also not sefardi) so it was slightly less of a shocker.

Is it a sefardi thing?

MrsEsther

Sun, Jan 07 2024, 11:24 pm

amother Melon wrote:

Yes it’s sephardic Rav Yosef Karo also referred to as Maran holds that it’s dangerous to eat milk and fish together.
Ashkenaz hold by rav Moshe Isserles who says it’s fine to eat milk and fish together.

amother

Melon

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 12:16 am

MrsEsther wrote:

Interesting.
Why then are there some chassidish who don't?

amother

Plum

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 12:28 am

amother Melon wrote:

Interesting.
Why then are there some chassidish who don't?

They both follow kabala

Tao

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 12:33 am

amother Melon wrote:

Interesting.
Why then are there some chassidish who don't?

I know Chabad people who don't not sure if all though

amother

Sunflower

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 12:39 am

We don’t eat fish with milk.
But we do eat fish with cheese.
Come to think of it, I wonder why cheese is okay if milk is not.

amother

Stoneblue

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 6:01 am

Tao wrote:

I know Chabad people who don't not sure if all though

I'm Chabad and grew up eating fish only with butter, for some reason, never milk or cheese. DH holds its ok, though. Still have never had a tuna melt. It just feels weird.

amother

Lightgreen

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 8:08 am

We are sefardim and we do eat them together. The minhag where my dh family is from is to allow it, his parents both grew up there and have clear memories of it being eaten by everyone. This is also brought down in a sefer on minhagim in this country. So there you go, completely frum and we have no problem with it.

In general we do follow the psak of Rav Ovadia ztzl but in any situation where the minhag in our family is different (based on where we come from) we follow our minhag.

amother

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 8:38 am

amother Lightgreen wrote:

Ok so at least one sfardi family who does!

amother

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 8:39 am

amother Sunflower wrote:

We don’t eat fish with milk.
But we do eat fish with cheese.
Come to think of it, I wonder why cheese is okay if milk is not.

Interesting! Never heard of this differentiation.

amother

Heather

Mon, Jan 08 2024, 8:44 am

amother OP wrote:

Interesting! Never heard of this differentiation.

So curious what the disagreement between you and your husband was lol!
I am not sfardi (actually pretty heimish) but my aunt and uncle (who is a big Syrian rav actually) and all their Syrian kids do not eat fish and dairy together