Anyone else think it's gotten out of hand?

amother

Thu, Jan 18 2024, 4:32 pm

I think a big part of what bothers me is that many of the people shnoring lead a lavish lifestyle. Don't ask me to donate to your child's school when you spend on brand names and travel several times a year.

amother

Tomato

Thu, Jan 18 2024, 4:42 pm

amother OP wrote:

I pay my tution but still asked people if they could donate on my page for the school fundraiser.

As it happens I don't live in luxury, but if someone pays tuition and the fund raiser covers for those who can't pay, building fund etc why can't they live how they want.

If it bothers you, don't give but why stop others?

amother

Seagreen

Thu, Jan 18 2024, 5:18 pm

amother OP wrote:

They often have already given generously themselves. The school wants them to raise more, though. So they share to everyone they know with the hope that 5% of those people will donate something also.

Highstrung

Thu, Jan 18 2024, 5:25 pm

amother OP wrote:

It has nothing to do with the individual posting . The school makes it a requirement whether you want to do it or not. I know that when it comes to my children’s schools and yeshivos I do whatever I can to raise the funds , and yes , that means constantly updating my status, etc.
It does feel like too much , when it’s constant . But, I’ve been in school meetings where they said there is huge success with these campaigns and all they ask is for the parents post the link and follow up. Nobody is forced to give or even check my status .

amother

Indigo

Thu, Jan 18 2024, 8:54 pm

I recently got a text asking to contribute to a campaign. It was from someone I never met before, they just got my number off of a list. I didn't respond because I don't usually answer these mass text things and a half hour later I got another text from them with just "???". Now THAT is what I call chutzpah

amother

Quince

Thu, Jan 18 2024, 8:59 pm

pause wrote:

What I think is the concept of tzedaka for aniyim has been replaced with money for organizations. Those two are not the same thing!

It drives me crazy when I know the person behind the campaign gets to pocket 49% of the funds raised. I asked a rav and he said it’s still tzeddaka because it isn’t my responsibility how the organization wants to pay its fundraisers… but I feel like I’m not really giving tzeddaka when I know that only half the money is going to the cause.

asmileaday

Thu, Jan 18 2024, 9:12 pm

It's amusing to get links from people you haven't spoken to in years. Those are the easiest to ignore.
It's the ones I speak with or meet frequently that are much more awkward to ignore. I can't and won't donate to every fundraiser.
As much as I feel bad for your cause, if I have extra money it's going directly to family members that are struggling.

amother

Mistyrose

Thu, Jan 18 2024, 9:34 pm

I used to think the same way as many of the posts do. It all changed when my son's school did same sort of fundraiser. Out of tremendous hakaras hatov we went out of our comfort zone and asked friends and neighbors for donations.
Now when I see people reach out or post for a mikvah campaign or school or anything else I am more inclined to give. If it's someone I know and it's important for them I give and try to give generously.
The more ppl, organization, I am giving the reacher I feel.

amother

Celeste

Thu, Jan 18 2024, 9:49 pm

amother Pansy wrote:

I dont see why its more annoying than all the tzedaka letters we used to get in the mail years ago.

Those didn't come from people you knew, multiple times a day.

amother

Mimosa

Thu, Jan 18 2024, 10:55 pm

smss wrote:

Especially when it's someone you haven't spoken to in years...

I no longer donate to fundraisers.

amother

Pansy

Thu, Jan 18 2024, 11:43 pm

amother Celeste wrote:

Those didn't come from people you knew, multiple times a day.

You really get requests multiple times every day?

amother

Topaz

Fri, Jan 19 2024, 1:24 am

Organizations didn't want to do their fundraisers a few months ago, with the war breaking out in Israel. So they're all happening too close together now. That's what I heard.

tweety1

Fri, Jan 19 2024, 7:34 am

amother Garnet wrote:

The money I raise for my kids school is not coming off my tuition. I pay full tuition. I’m in a school where most of the parents are simple and of little means. Whatever you donate goes toward the most devoted sincere selfless rebbeim you ever met. They don’t get paid well, it’s not a fancy school.

Why in the world would I donate to a school/cheder/yeshiva I have absolutely no connection to? Just because my niece/nephew goes there?? I'd much rather spend my money on an organization that helps the sick, almonos , yesomim , etc

amother

Blue

Fri, Jan 19 2024, 7:43 am

What is everyone upset about?
If you don’t want to give - don’t.
If the person is hounding you, it’s a problem with the person, not the org.
Someone’s lavish lifestyle has absolutely nothing to do with giving for a cause that the person is collecting for. Is ther person with lavish lifestyle berating you for not giving ?
Usually people with a lavish lifestyle have a bigger influence and therefore are more active in these campaigns. My sons school just did a campaign and I noticed it was the people who I have a tinge of jealousy for with their lifestyle that were the biggest raisers. I also noticed that they have significantly themselves.
I think live and let live. You can easily ignore most campaigns, and the ones that are pressuring you, simply tell them now is not a good time.

amother

Daphne

Fri, Jan 19 2024, 8:11 am

tweety1 wrote:

There are some amazing but struggling schools out there. I don’t donate to most schools but if I know and love the school and want it to succeed for the community’s sake, I definitely donate.

amf

Fri, Jan 19 2024, 8:15 am

tweety1 wrote:

There are halachos about where to prioritize your tzedaka. Limud torah might vry well come before organizations. AYLOR

amother

Dustypink

Fri, Jan 19 2024, 8:31 am

If I want to acknowledge someone's fundraising page, I try to donate $10 with a warm message for hatzlacha or tizku lemitzvos.
Most people are not that careful with spending $10. Prices at the grocery store are outrageous.
If it bothers you nobody has to look at updated whatsapp status.
Actually sometimes I find then entertaining. Tzedakka campaigns last a couple of days.
And then it's on to the next! LOL

Hashem_Yaazor

Fri, Jan 19 2024, 8:34 am

tweety1 wrote:

Because I want my relative to have a positive school experience without the school shutting its doors or not being able to afford quality staff?

Because sometimes the relative needs to raise a certain amount or pay it instead so it's helping the relative in that way...

Schools are an absolute priority for me after seeing multiple schools' finances and so if I have money to donate, even a minor amount, at that time, I prioritize it over other perhaps wonderful organizations. It's a need to have successful schools, not a luxury.