S/O no-shoe house | Imamother

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Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette

S/O no-shoe house

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amother

Tue, Mar 26 2024, 3:08 pm

For all the shoe-free hosts, do you ever warn your guests beforehand like "hey! We're so excited to host you for shabbos meal. FYI We have a shoe-free home and we offer socks/slippers. But if you prefer your own, feel free to bring along!"?
I've been to these house and felt extremely uncomfortable bc my socks had holes or my feet were really sweaty that day. A heads up could've helped avoid discomfort and lead to less resentful feelings....
Is that socially off?

amother

Honeysuckle

Tue, Mar 26 2024, 3:12 pm

Not socially off but maybe in the future just know that no matter where you go you may be asked to take off your shoes… just so you won’t have to feel embarrassed. Throw out all the socks with holes Smile

(And btw if they are going to insist guests take off shoes it would be nice to let them know before)

Cheiny

Tue, Mar 26 2024, 4:04 pm

amother Honeysuckle wrote:

(And btw if they are going to insist guests take off shoes it would be nice to let them know before)

No matter where you do you may be asked to take off your shoes? I’ve never once been asked to take off my shoes, anywhere, and I wouldn’t dream of asking my guests to either, even though we tend to remove ours, but it’s not a strict rule…

I think it’s an unfair imposition on guests and could be potentially embarrassing, not to mention uncomfortable.

sequoia

Tue, Mar 26 2024, 4:10 pm

This is why I want to go back to Ukraine.

Even delivery men take off their shoes there! And handymen, plumbers, electricians… and of course friends.

Warning people is not necessary.

amother

Ebony

Tue, Mar 26 2024, 4:19 pm

Fortunately this is rare in my life, but I do wish those few hosts had warned me ahead of time. Nothing like deciding to walk many blocks in shoes that aren't so comfortable for the sake of looking good and put-together, only to be asked to remove them when you arrive.

At least at one house they gave every guest a brand new pair of slippers (the kind you'd get as a first class airline passenger). Other people hand me old mangey slippers and I wonder why my feet have to get nasty to keep their floor clean. Banging head

amother

Babyblue

Tue, Mar 26 2024, 4:21 pm

We have a strict no shoe policy, but I would never ask a guest to take theirs off. When my kids have friends over they do take them off. Many of their houses also are shoe free so it's not odd to them.

amother

Cinnamon

Tue, Mar 26 2024, 4:30 pm

amother Babyblue wrote:

Same.

The little kids I ask to remove their shoes but the adults I've never asked although I would say 90% of adult family members come to my house and they all take their shoes off on their home.

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