I need help please?

katb

Tue, Sep 22 2009, 11:31 am

I go to shul every week and it's not just for the "social/kiddush thing". Yes that is certainly a part of it and I don't think it's a bad thing - I think it is important to be a recognised and needed part of my community. But I also like to daven with the community, to listen to the repetition of the amidah and leining etc. You are missing that by davening at home

Ruchel

Tue, Sep 22 2009, 11:32 am

There are frum families who don't have the luck of a shul in walking distance. Or it's in walking distance but one hour or more each way. In that case boys go, not girls, and no one when it rains.

I know of a few families that way, my dh of a lot more.

greenfire

Tue, Sep 22 2009, 11:36 am

once you start going to shul - you get the hang of following ... then again I've been going since I'm ten years old - with few breaks as having an infant or something similar ...

these days they have great siddurim with instructions of all the details - when to stand, when to sit, what to say ... although you can also just copy what the other congregants do ... unless they're busy talking ...

it's sad to note that young girls do not attend shul on a regular basis ... only a handful do ... the rest sleep in - which is why we need sundays to sleep in ... shabbos GO TO SHUL !!!

melbee

Tue, Sep 22 2009, 12:44 pm

Just to point out (and not to make you nervous OP) every shul will have their own minhagim concerning when to stand or sit, and which tefillos are said or skipped. Artscroll includes everything, and very rarely have I been in a shul where they do everything as Artscroll describes. Sometimes whole pages are skipped, and you have to find where the chazzan is. I still think Artscroll is the best for someone who hasn't davened before however, and would strongly suggest picking up the Machzor. I also advise sitting close to the back. In my experience, being in the back was the best b/c this way you can just mimic what those in front of you are doing (they stand, so do you) and there are less people who can see you (although trust me, I doubt anyone will be noticing a slight lag on your sitting or standing, it just feels obvious to you, and if they do notice it won't be mentioned).

Hatzlocha! If it helps, we generally build things up in our minds to be much worse than they are. I hope you find your davening to be fulfilling.