Twins with totally different personalities, how to deal?

TwinsMommy

Sun, Apr 11 2010, 1:41 am

as babies, Reena would only cry for a bottle or a diaper-- that was it. Chananiah was my kvetcher.

Now in the course of a day as 3 year olds, Reena CONSTANTLYYYYY wants my attention and screams when I leave the room to go to the bathroom. If I'm not reading book after book after book to her it's not pretty. And Chananiah, though he's got major transition issues which throw him into temper tantrums, is happy as a clam playing by himself for hours. So an hour will go by where Chananiah will have been sitting with blocks and books and Mr Potato head and alphabet magnets and a coloring book and I'll have forgotten he's in the room because I'm reading the 67th book in a row to Reena.

As babies, Chananiah got a lot more attention. Now, it's definitely evening out.

Coffee3

Mon, Apr 12 2010, 2:58 pm

My b/g twins were very similar in needs (not personality). But they were good. When Baby A was being held, Baby B waited till I was finished to let me know that she needed me.. and vice versa.
I still had twin mommy's guilt. How do I pay attention to both of them? I dont want to keep switching too often. If they were an only child etc etc ...It took me a few years to figure it out but I'm more OK with it now because there is now a Baby C..

Mirabelle

Mon, Apr 12 2010, 4:40 pm

OP here, twins are now 6 months old and their personalities have become even more distinct. One is clearly more of a "people person" and one is more into her own needs. No doubt I still have the "twin mommy guilt" from time to time, especially as they are now eating baby food and there is no way for me feed them both at the same time, but we are certainly getting more used to things. I also have a big girl, so for me the hardest part is making sure that all three get their needs met and attention.

May

Sun, Apr 25 2010, 10:09 pm

As a mother of twins, I find it interesting that you can't feed them both food at the same time. I actually found it so much easier than giving them bottles or nursing at the same time. I sat both babies in thier highchairs side by side and I sat in a chair facing them. I held the bowl of food in my hand (or on a small table nearby) and I fed one a spoonful, and then the other a spoonful, alternating babies between each spoonful. While one swallowed her bite, I was feeding a spoonful to the other twin. I actually didn't find that this took much longer than when I would feed only one baby.

Mirabelle

Mon, Apr 26 2010, 6:58 pm

May wrote:

Maybe I am being overly careful, but I do not feed from the same bowl because the saliva on the spoons can get then get into the food. This way they do not share germs as much (yes I have had the twins sick at different times.) ALSO, one of my twins is a very impatient eater and will freak out if you take breaks while feeding her.

May

Sun, Jun 06 2010, 9:53 pm

Just saw your reply now -

I gave up on the separate germ thing very early on in the game, b/c it was just impossible otherwise and we kept messing up anyway. The funny thing was that they actually did not seem to catch each other's illnesses, despite sharing the same spoons and bottles, etc. They almost never are sick together, and rarely does on follow the other in getting sick.
I dunno, especially when they are the stage that they are eating food they are most likely at the stage where all the toys go into their mouths too. Are you able to keep the toys that they slobber on separate? If not, then whats the difference, they are already sharing germs. Also my twins pull out each others' pacifier and put it into their mouths, whether I like it or not.

About the impatient eater thing, I have one like that too (actually they both were to certain extents) and I always said that its a good thing that they are twins - they are learning to share and take turns from a very early age even though it goes against their grain.