HELP!! How can I adjust her sleep schedule????

SplitPea

Fri, Dec 31 2010, 8:53 am

I have a 11 week old DD (my first) who has B"H been sleeping through the night since she was about 4 weeks old!) the only major problem is she REFUSES to even start to go down till about mignight sometimes 1 am! (and then sleeps till 8 or 9) Dh needs to get up early (5:30) and nightimes alone is pretty hard for me. I would LOVE to find a way to get her to go to bed earlier. I already try turning off all the lights as of about 10:00 and cluster feeding her then 9what she typically does before going to bed....

the problem is if I try and get her down to early she gets cranky and starts screaming and then stays up even later!!!

She has no real schedule as of yet... she wakes up about 8:30 typically is up for about an hour then eats again and goes down for another 2 hour nap then naps randomly through out the day. I am trying not to let her sleep after about 6 but all that is doing is making her cranky and then again at this age she is falling asleep in any position she wants so its very hard to keep her up.

I could really use some advice on this. DH is getting cranky from the little sleep and its taking a toll on our marriage. with Mikva coming up I am wondering how in the world we are going to be together at all we will both wanna crash in bed!

Gerbera

Fri, Dec 31 2010, 9:00 am

So, does she wake up from her last nap at 6pm? If so - once she is up for 30-45 minutes I would bathe her and then feed her and then put her to bed, which will have hopefully tired her out. I just don't know if you can expect her to sleep from like 7:30pm to 8am as she was before - she will probably wake up earlier. Try and establish a bedtime "routine" for her - like bath, feed and bed so she associates the bath with bedtime and nap time - it may take time...but I would definitely aim for an earlier bedtime for her! She's still so little - if she wants to go to sleep like 8 or so at night - then let her and hopefully she'll still do the 8-9 hours she was doing before. She may wake at 5am, but maybe you can then feed her and she'll go back to bed or she may sleep longer. I prefer early bedtimes and early wake ups to late bedtimes and late mornings...I need my evenings and since my other kids wake up early - my baby may as well be up then! (my youngest is 5 months).

amother

Sat, Jan 01 2011, 9:58 pm

This is pretty typical for a baby that age. I bumped up the bedtime by no more than 20-30 min every few days until it was loser to 9:30/10. If he woke up as if it was a nap, I rocked or nursed him in a dark room until he fell asleep again. It wasn't easy, but it's not terrible.

Mikva night. . . ah, memories! Well, let's just say we hung around feeling frustrated for a looong time, until we got the baby to sleep. And he didn't sleep through the night as beautifully as your does, so at that point it was quickie or nothing.

amother

Sat, Jan 01 2011, 10:09 pm

amother wrote:

not op, but I was wondering about the "quickie"
I just had my first and my dh has already been talking about mikva night, and after that also. he asked if my baby cries in middle if ill stop, or suddenly want to rush. hes very nervous of that. so what is the balance?
dont bash my dh. he is very helpful. its not that he doesnt understand that an infant needs attention, but he wants to know that he'll still have his loving wife Very Happy

amother

Sat, Jan 01 2011, 10:24 pm

amother wrote:

I am the "quickie amother." LOL

first of all, it's very likely that things will be painful the first few (or more) times, so you should prepare your dh for the possibility of taking things slowly, and possibly not getting all the way there at first- the quickies will come later!

I totally understand your dh's concern, and it's great that you recognize it too. The best idea is not to try to get into things until your baby is down for the night, or you're expecting a long stretch of sleep. Obviously, that's not always possible, so you may run into those frustrating moments, also known as coitus interruptus. Some people are ok finishing up when the baby starts crying. Some people have to stop immediately, and continue after the baby is calm. I've done both, depending on the situation (towards the beginning, more likely to stop and start after; towards the end, more likely to finish up). You'll see for yourself soon enough what works for you!