Finger sucking | Imamother

Chippies

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 11:54 am

My almost 3 year old son is still sucking his fingers on a regular basis. He is a high anxiety kid and he sucks his fingers to relieve that anxiety. I am getting a lot of pressure from my in-laws to put some bad tasting nail polish type stuff on his finger nails to make him stop sucking his fingers. His teeth have definitely shifted and they worry about long lasting problems. I figure almost everyone needs braces anyway, so I don't care so much about teeth issues - I do worry about his not having a way to relieve his anxiety. I keep giving reasons for pushing it off (such as he needs his fingers for the transition into the new school), and then my next excuse is that the upsherin might cause anxiety too...but after December, I really don't have any reason to push it off. I guess I'm just scared of how my kid will react to it. Sometimes if he has something yucky on his fingers, I tell him to keep his fingers out of his mouth and he listens very well. At a certain point, however, he'll start to cry if he can't put his fingers in his mouth. He says that he needs to do it. I figure that he'll stop on his own at some point, right?

I guess I'm just wondering if anyone has any experience trying to get their kid to stop sucking fingers or thumb. It's obviously different than a pacifier because you can't just take it away!

Thanks!

amother

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 2:08 pm

yes I just went through this with my kids the orthodontist told me to get them
to stop already he even said the 3 year old. I had 4 kids who sucked there thumb/fingers
and was going out of my mind already b"h I put that yuck stuff on there thumb that the orthodontist
told me to buy and I no longer have any thumb/finger suckers.

I thought they would never stop
the pacifier is much easier to get rid of

amother

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 2:23 pm

Chippies wrote:

I figure that he'll stop on his own at some point, right?

Not necessarily. A neighbor of mine thumbsucked her way thru med school. Probably not in class, but at home alone while studying. For all I know she still does fifteen years later.

My kids stopped only when they got braces, and then only because they attached an appliance that made thumbsucking impossible. Had I known there was such a thing, I'd have gotten them the appliance alone years before and then the braces themselves would have been unnecessary.

Chippies

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 8:59 pm

What I want to know is how a kid deals with it when his fingers suddenly taste disgusting. As I said before, my son has a lot of anxiety issues and I fear that he'll cry for days if we put that yucky stuff on. I'm worried that he'll be scarred for life! (he obviously gets his anxiety from me!). Also, how difficult is it to wash the yucky stuff off the nails? I'm wondering if maybe it would make sense to only have the yucky stuff on his nails in the day time and then for sleep, take it off. I really don't think he'll be able to fall asleep without sucking his fingers.

zaq

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 9:27 pm

If you;re going to let him suck his fingers at bedtime, there's no point to preventing it all day, except for the fact that it'll get the neighbors off your back because they won't see it. By letting him indulge this habit at bedtime you'll confuse him at best and undo the work you did trying to get him to quit by day. This kind of thing has to be cold turkey.

the way a kid deals with the bitter pill is he tries sucking his fingers a few times, realizes this isn't working out so well, and quits. Don't be surprised if he picks up some other annoying self-soothing mannerism instead, like sticking his finger in his nose or twisting a lock of hair around and around. But at least those behaviors, irritating though they may be, won't lead to thousands of dollars worth of orthodontia in a few years.

No, your son will not necessarily quit on his own. Some do, some don't.

Hon, you don't seriously believe your kid will be scarred for life because you painted yucky tasting liquid on his fingers when he was three? As marina (I think it was) would say--drama much? But I'll tell you what may very well scar him--being the butt of his classmates' disdain because he's a baby who still sucks his fingers in school. "baby, baby, stick your head in gravy..." Yeah. Given those two options for my child, I know which one I'd choose.

Chippies

Thu, Sep 22 2011, 10:28 pm

zaq wrote:

Thanks, I needed that. And no, I wasn't being entirely serious when I said that my son will be scarred for life - but I do worry about how he'll react and how long it'll take him to get back to being himself. The nose picking thing he already does with his index finger as two other fingers are in his mouth, so that may get worse. I worry a lot - way too much. I know. It's just that he spends so much time sucking his fingers now - in fact it's gotten a lot worse over the past 3 months or so - that I can't imagine how he'll be without sucking his fingers, and I fear the worst. I guess I'll stick to the plan of attempting to cut the habit a few weeks after his upsherin. Let him get used to his new look (which I anticipate he'll really not like at all) and then we'll start with the yucky fingernail stuff. Thanks for knocking some sense into me.