No consistency | Imamother

amother

Sun, Dec 25 2011, 10:36 am

8 months old, mostly nursing, eats 2-3 solid meals a day. His daytime schedule is predictable- nothing deviates from within a half hour. Night is a different story. I know he CAN sleep through the night- he does it once in a week or 2- but he usually doesn't. And when he doesn't, there's no telling whether it's going to be just one waking or five. Sometimes, it's enough to just go in there and rub his back, or pick him up and rock for a minute and I always try that first. Other times, he won't go back to sleep without nursing. I can handle it just fine when he only wakes up once, but those 4-5 waking nights really kill me the next day. How can I get him to consistently sleep through or wake only once?

ellie23

Sun, Dec 25 2011, 11:49 am

I always say this before I give baby advice...this is my opinion some will disagree others wont but I have done this and my babies have been sleeping 12 hours straight since 14 weeks old

basically my philosophy is that we must teach our babies what nighttime means and what we expect of them at night so that they can feel a stable and steady routine and get quality sleep nightly.

this is what I have done:

set a regular bedtime every night usually between 6:30 and 8 pm is good for a baby that age. do the same routine before bed each night. it may be a bath, bottle, book and bed or something like that...if you feed solids at night I suggest doing that first and then doing the bath bottle routine as solid foods require more action and are not soothing meals. I keep my lamps on but shut main lights so the room is dim and relaxing but still light enough to feed and read to them. after that, place the baby in the crib in the position he likes and keep the room dark with maybe a little white noise and close the door. when the baby wakes up NEVER PICK HIM UP. at the first sign of crying, I wait 1 minute (sometimes its just a nightmare and they stop right away) then go in and return pacifiers/pat on the back. I may say shhhh to calm the baby but mostly I say nothing. I leave immediately after EVEN IF THE BABY IS STILL CRYING. this way, he knows you love him and are there but he is also learning that now is time to sleep and stay in the crib until morning. I wait 5 minutes after that (this is so hard for me but it worked!) and if he is still crying, go in again, retunr pacis, blankies etc..pat on the back, no talking and leave..wait 7 minutes and repeat, wait 10 minutes and repeat (obviously, only still go in if he is still crying). eventually he will stop, though not before he tests you if you really mean business. if you try this I suspect on the first 2 nights there will be alot of crying because you have been picking him up/nursing him so he believes you will do the same but it isnt too late to start a new, healthier pattern with him. if he is a decent weight he doesnt need to eat at night anymore at that age and should sleep between 6-12 hours at a time (should really be closer to 12 at 8 months). if you stick to your guns and keep doing it you should see improvement right away! we need to teach our babies how to sleep and be consistent so they learn to self-soothe and get quality restful sleep they deserve! good luck!

5*Mom

Sun, Dec 25 2011, 11:56 am

I am generally not a proponent of sleep training simply b/c from my own experiences and from listening to others asking for this kind of advice there is usually an underlying reason why the baby is not sleeping peacefully. That said, your baby is 8 mos old, is nursing and eating nicely so is not likely to be waking due to hunger, and has very regular sleeping/waking patterns during the day which makes me think that he is just replicating his day patterns at night. I think the above advice is very sound and I'd give it a go.

ellie23

Sun, Dec 25 2011, 1:03 pm

its not easy! here are some tips:

1. keep reminding yourself that you are teaching him an invaluable skill and saving your own sanity which will make you a better parent to him!

2. you will get more sleep and peace of mind in the long run so its worth the time investment now

3. close his door and go to another room where you wont hear it as much or at all...5 minutes later listen outside his door to hear if he is still crying...stay far and keep an eye on the clock..if you dont hear it loudly you will be able to keep your sanity easier...

good luck!

amother

Tue, Dec 27 2011, 4:44 pm

So the first night, not so bad. I spent a half hour going in and out, did not nurse or pick him up, eventually, he fell asleep. Last night was bad. It went on for over an hour. Going in made it worse- I think he was mad that I'd come in but not pick him up. Anyway, by the end, there was just no sign of slowing down, so I nursed him until he calmed down enough to go back to sleep. He wasn't hungry, he just needed calming. Am I back to square one now? How long before he's able to do this without needing my help?