Gift giving expectation at work

blini

Tue, May 13 2014, 5:08 pm

Ladies, I need your advice about proper etiquette. At work we get invited to a small celebration when someone has a special celebration - upcoming wedding, birth, etc.. The department will get a small cake or something like that and have a little get together in the break room. It's a big department and there is a celebration every couple of weeks.

Recently, the invitation started to include the registry information. I just noticed it today and went back a few months in the calendar, and noticed that it was first included when the head of the department had his first child.

In the past, no one bought each other gifts at work. My boss has never bought me one and in turn, I took my cue from him, and never bought him one. Now, is the game changing, or do you think they're just including the registry because people have asked and said it would be nice to know where they are registered in case they'd like to get a gift?

For the record, I don't have a personal relationship with any of these people. Some I've never met because I work in a different country. I would not expect a gift from them in any situation. A good wish on the phone or in person is more than enough, and even that is not expected.

I'm trying to get a sense of the expectation professionally. Money, as always, is tight, but offending someone is worse.

MiracleMama

Tue, May 13 2014, 5:16 pm

It's one thing to do a chip-in gift from the whole department, but for you on your own to gift each coworker for every occasion that comes up, every couple weeks as you say.... how could anyone afford that? Seems crazy to me.

zaq

Tue, May 13 2014, 5:26 pm

Registries are a shameless bid for gifts, and as such, very bad form, even more so in the workplace. Ignore them. If you're especially close to someone and want to give a gift out of the goodness of your heart, do so privately. You don't want to find yourself in a sitch in which you now have to get a gift for every Joe Schmoe who gets his ingrown toenail removed because you once gave a gift to a friend who got married.

The head of the dept. sounds like a crass so-and-so.