My Two Year Old Refuses to Sleep!

Rrs123

Tue, May 27 2014, 4:30 pm

I have the most adorable and charming little boy. But he is also the most challenging kid I ever knew! among all the challenges, the one that is driving me insane is his refusal to sleep!

He was never a good sleeper but now it is really out of hand. I'm so frustrated and exhausted and totally at a loss.

About a year ago we did a sleep training program that helped him go to sleep on his own and sleep though the night (most of the time). But ever since my second baby was born he REFUSES to go into his crib. It's almost five months and the problem is getting worse every night.

So we switched to a bed, but he keeps on jumping out. He also wakes up 2 or 3 times in the middle of the night and he wakes up way too early!

He resists sleep with all his might. He cries, kicks, screams and no matter how exhausted he is he just does not let himself sleep.

Today he woke up at 5am and only had a short nap in the morning. I spent over an hour trying to get him to go to sleep tonight. We went form his bed to my bed and back to the crib.... In the process, he manage to completely drain every ounce on my patience and brake his crib! He only fell a sleep after an hour and ten minutes of tantrums and driving me crazy!

This is a real nightmare!

Any suggestions for tomorrow night?

Yocheved_G

Tue, May 27 2014, 4:43 pm

It would seem that the starting point is to tap into what is so upsetting to him about going to sleep. Going to sleep equals separation from you & he is desperately clinging to being close to you. It would seem that's why things got worse after the new baby was born.

What if you took all the pressure off of going to sleep? What if you lay next to him and told him you just wanted to cuddle and spend time together (reading, chatting or even better whispering) but it wasn't a bed time? That way you can create an association (in the long run) of his bed, not being a place of separation, but place of closeness... I would imagine this would take a while (a number of nights) but eventually you could entirely change the night time dynamic.

Sarah f

Tue, May 27 2014, 5:22 pm

Let him lie on couch and fall asleep there warn him if he gets up he's going to his own bed (follow thru even for a few min)!
Music or acapella on in his room, it may help him to calm...
Lots of hugs my oldest did that to us, he did eventually grow out of it...

Rrs123

Wed, May 28 2014, 2:14 am

Yocheved_G wrote:

Thanks Yocheved! This is so true.
I couldn't understand what was so horrible for him about going to sleep. You helped me look at it in a different way. Now I understand that his problem must be his bad association with bedtime.
My pediatrician along with all the sleep training websites say that the reason he wakes up at night is because he does not have the skills to go back to sleep on his own. So I strictly followed their advice with a very consistent bedtime routine and I try to leave the room before he falls a sleep.
Problem is, he resists the bedtime routine as well.
Now my focus will be on taking away his bad association with sleep.

Thanks for the good advice!

Rrs123

Wed, May 28 2014, 2:18 am

momX4 wrote:

does he snore when he sleeps. My ds had a difficult time sleeping. We gave him melitonim, but it didn't keep him sleeping. We took him to an ENT and had his enlarged tonsilsand adanoids removed. Sleeping wasn't an issue anymore.

This is very encouraging! He does snore a lot breaths very heavily. I have an appointment with an ENT in three weeks. I really hope he can get help.