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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> School age children
amother
Seashell
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Wed, Apr 22 2015, 4:17 pm
What to do with big kid who consistently doesn't wipe well? He is by nature rushing through life, but this is YUCK!
Anon to protect my son.
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ra_mom
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Wed, Apr 22 2015, 4:40 pm
Teach him to keep wiping and throwing the tissue/baby wipe in the toilet until it comes out clean
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amother
Oak
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Wed, Apr 22 2015, 5:31 pm
Please sit and explain how bad this can be, he might not care now, but I know s/o who didn't wipe well, got a scratch and wound up w/ an abscess in that area. Incredibly painful of course! (also can lead to worms)
You can also have him do his own laundry - scrub his underwear until they get clean. He will see how gross and time consuming it is to do this, and might be motivated to keep cleaner.
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amother
Seashell
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Wed, Apr 22 2015, 11:50 pm
Thanks for your responses!
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amother
Olive
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 12:02 am
1. Buy flushable wipes, it is much easier to get clean with them
2. Buy him dark colored underwear.
But I would make him scrub if you can.
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Merrymom
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 12:29 am
Do NOT make him scrub it. That's beyond gross. Put some bleach on it and put it in a separate bleach wash. Teach him and teach him. It can take years. Kids are kids, not mini adults.
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amother
Firebrick
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 12:34 am
Don't make him scrub it
Good luck
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amother
Sienna
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 3:41 am
whatever you do, please somehow find a way to talk to him about it.
otherwise he may turn into an adult man, like my husband, who also frequently leaves skid marks. YUCK.
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Reesa
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 7:52 am
You can keep teaching but some kids just don't get it. I'm at my wits end with my dd with the same issue. She thinks she's doing a great job but just misses the right spot and the tissue comes out clean! She's absent minded in general and this is a frustrating part of it.
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imaima
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 8:25 am
make them scrub it? if he is not good with wiping, is he good with washing hands? wouldn't it be even worse if he gets this dtuff under the nails?
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PAMOM
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 10:28 am
OP, give him a separate laundry container (small) for his closet and 7 pair of underwear. Tell him that he needs to wash his underwear with bleach or bleach substitute and detergent at least once a week in warm water. Show him how to use the washer and dryer. Do all this quietly and privately --and get him flushable wipes also. died he have IBD or another condition that might contribute?
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FranticFrummie
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 12:40 pm
I don't see what's so horrible about having him scrub his own underwear. It's not a punishment, it's a natural consequence. A punishment would be to make him mow the lawn, and would make no sense. There's a big difference.
At my house, we're a huge fan of Costco Kirkland brand flushable wipes (can you get those in Israel, or will we have to bring in several cases?) Still, DD is often in too big of a hurry to wipe, and I have to send her back into the bathroom with the "wipe, flush, wash" reminder.
I've threatened to put up a notice in the bathroom to remind her, and I told her that when all of her friends visit they'll see that she needs reminding. She was horrified at the thought! Things improved somewhat after that. (I wouldn't really do it, but I did consider it for a while.)
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amother
Firebrick
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 3:04 pm
FranticFrummie wrote: | I don't see what's so horrible about having him scrub his own underwear. It's not a punishment, it's a natural consequence. A punishment would be to make him mow the lawn, and would make no sense. There's a big difference.
At my house, we're a huge fan of Costco Kirkland brand flushable wipes (can you get those in Israel, or will we have to bring in several cases?) Still, DD is often in too big of a hurry to wipe, and I have to send her back into the bathroom with the "wipe, flush, wash" reminder.
I've threatened to put up a notice in the bathroom to remind her, and I told her that when all of her friends visit they'll see that she needs reminding. She was horrified at the thought! Things improved somewhat after that. (I wouldn't really do it, but I did consider it for a while.) |
It seems kind of mean to make a little kid scrub his underwear. I'm not a fan of "natural consequences" for everything, sometimes it's too extreme.
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mommyla
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 3:28 pm
amother wrote: | It seems kind of mean to make a little kid scrub his underwear. I'm not a fan of "natural consequences" for everything, sometimes it's too extreme. |
Depends on how old he is. If he's older than 9, I'd say have him take care of it. If you don't want to make him scrub, at least give him a bottle of Shout and make sure he sprays the marks before he puts them in the hamper.
I keep flushable wipes in all the bathrooms and they are a lifesaver. They've made it so much easier to teach my son how to wipe properly. Even I like to use them!
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Miri1
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 3:48 pm
amother wrote: | Please sit and explain how bad this can be, he might not care now, but I know s/o who didn't wipe well, got a scratch and wound up w/ an abscess in that area. Incredibly painful of course! (also can lead to worms)
You can also have him do his own laundry - scrub his underwear until they get clean. He will see how gross and time consuming it is to do this, and might be motivated to keep cleaner. |
Don't mean to nitpick, but how does this lead to worms?
Worms are caught from not washing hands properly.
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sourstix
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 3:56 pm
by giving your child flushable wipes your not teaching him alot bec when you go somewhere you wont be having wipes at a freinds house or whatever. so they need to be taught. and I have the same issue with ds. he has dirty underwear all the time. I know hes grossed out by wiping himself. I dont know why though. maybe he has sensory issues. I dont know.
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Frumdoc
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 3:57 pm
Flushable wipes. Put underwear in a bleach wash with other shmattes etc.
I would not make a kid do their laundry for that unless they all did their own laundry regularly for other reasons, or it will be perceived as a punishment and humiliation which is the last thing you want. Be natural and don't make a fuss, just point out the wet wipes.
Is he constipated? This can contribute.
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sneakermom
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 4:04 pm
Why are we so obsessed? How horrible do we need to make a child feel for being human? A kid? Oblivious perhaps.
Maybe we should send a pair of his undies to his rebbe.
Or make him show you every time how well he wiped.
Tell him a story about a very smart and delicious boy who was so busy. He had so much to do...(play with friends, read books, experiment with mud) that he forgot to wipe. One day he found wipes. And he used it and he felt clean. It was great. No more rashes, no dirt. Nice and clean. He felt good about it. And that was that.
And then leave it alone.
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Merrymom
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 5:30 pm
What is wrong with some mothers? Do they not understand that this is a skill that needs to be learned? That kids are not naturally perfectionists and it takes time to develop adult abilities? I feel bad for these kids. I would hate to make a child feel so judged and made to feel like they did something horrible when in truth they are acting like most children. Seriously do a poll, this is beyond ridiculous.
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naomi2
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Thu, Apr 23 2015, 5:41 pm
he may need probiotics to make is poop come out cleaner.
you can get acidophilus at any pharmacy-ask for ones in the refrigerator the other ones are not live and are pointless.
the pharmacist will be able to tell you a dosage for him, if you ask.
if you think about it, sometimes poop comes out and there's very little to wipe and sometimes, it takes a dozen tissues!
you don't have much to lose by trying. If you mix it with yogurt or applesauce it is virtually undetectable as it has very little taste and it just may do the trick.
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