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Forum
-> The Social Scene
-> Chit Chat
bashinda
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 Mon, Jun 04 2007, 9:09 pm
I was in a similar situation to you MitzvahMom especially when I was in college. I wasn't frum and most of my friends were guys and it wasn't a big deal.
Except it was. Most of the guys ended up becoming attracted to me because it was the next step and it made sense. Almost each time this happened. I now realize that they wre just doing what was natural. I was never interested however.
I guess now I see how you have to be careful with these types of relationships especially since you know it can't go farther for the reasons you told us. I would sugges speaking to your mashpia if you have one.
Hatzlacha!
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amother
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Mon, Jun 04 2007, 9:52 pm
| amother wrote: | | I am friends with a guy, and I have to say it is a totally different type of friendship than with a girlfriend. Its refreshing to get a male's point of view on things. |
I am sure you are, but is he? You don't know what's on his mind.
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Ruchel
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Mon, Jun 04 2007, 10:58 pm
If no one is attracted, where is the problem?
I have had many friendships with men, only a few of them ended up badly (guy became attracted, had to break the friendship). The others b'h, go very well. But of course you need to be clear from the beginning and the two people need the right personality for it. I would say it is much easier with a frum guy because of it.
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songbliss
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Thu, Jun 07 2007, 11:24 am
I as a teenager had a few guy friends but as soon as I got engaged I broke of contact with all of them. I said except 2 wish mazal tov, or if we're in town they could come & chill 2gether with my dh... but I broke off contact b/c you become emotionaly attached 2 another male, and I felt that was wrong. I think the only male u should be emotionaly attached 2 is ur dh. it was hard b/c many of these guys were like older brothers 2 me. but thats life...
its a confusing subject, spesh b/c such a big deal is made out of it!! guys r not aliens... its ok to be corteous... but how would u feel if ur dh would discuss ur personal life with another woman?? I would NOT like that!
with another guy... I couldn't really care less... b''h most of the time it has positive results!
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