Just for fun: Your Toddler’s Shidduch Resume

amother

Seafoam

Fri, Sep 01 2023, 1:27 am

Name: Precocious
Age: 2.5
Height: tall
Gorgeous bleach blond curls and a cute 5 year old smile (missing a few teeth)

Precocious has great zreizus and wakes the whole family up in the morning to start their day. Not only does he wake up early but he doesn't need tons of sleep and can get extra done in the day! He is very makpid with hilchos yichud and makes sure to learn the halachos daily. Precocious loves to drive his trucks and cars and thinks his Mommy is a climbing toy. His favorite song is Lchay oylamim and prefers to listen to it on repeat.
Precocious is a real catch. He will keep his wife on her toes with his wit, wisdom and unique way of doing things.

amother

Chartreuse

Fri, Sep 01 2023, 2:18 am

Name: Shmooki
Age: 2.8
Height: short
Brown hair that doesn’t stay in place for a minute
Melted chocolate colored eyes

Shmooki is very lovable and cuddly. He needs at least 20 minutes of cuddles every morning, and RIGHT AFTER breakfast.
He plays very nicely independently but will call out “watch me!” every 30 seconds to make sure you are paying attention. His love language is definitely touch, so hugs and kisses should be dispensed without limits.
He will clean up after himself, always packs the toys away, but on the downside will tantrum if his nose is drippy or his hands got a drop of oatmeal on it, so he definitely needs a neat freak girl to match his cleanliness needs.
He is very funny and will crack jokes but will border on chutzpah sometimes so make sure you can handle the sarcasm.
He speaks Yiddish Hebrew and English in every sentence.

amother

Wheat

Fri, Sep 01 2023, 4:04 am

amother Butterscotch wrote:

Why do all these boys sound like they're hyperactive? We're looking for a calm, easygoing guy for our amazing daughter.

I might have just the one!

Name: little guy
Age: 10 months
Gender: male

Little guy is full of smiles and loves to play. His favorites toys include deoderant, diaper cream, and electric wires. He is overall calm and even tempered, although definitely has little boy spirit and recently discovered the thrill of diving from high surfaces/parents arms - he has a lot of trust in the world and is unconcerned for his safety. Little guy has a very limited diet and is content to eat only oatmeal and bamba, although his mother would appreciate a girl who will help him expand his horizons.
Little guy is serious about his learning, especially when he can rip off the pages and stuff them in his mouth. He is also a talented swimmer with a love of all things water, including bathtime, hand-washing, and any sort of cups/bottle. He might do well with a girl who appreciates these passions.